Thinking that women would benefit if they were more open minded about height in a potential partner…

She couldn’t have meant Rishi could she. 😮

I've dated shorter and taller men. I agree that as a society, men who are shorter than their partners should not be emasculated or ridiculed.

However in my case most of the stick came from his friends. It then made him uncomfortable if I wore even the smallest heel. Eventually he didn't want me socialising in group sessions with his friends and their partners.

Safe to say I left him.

I would suggest that it is insecurity that is more unattractive to women, rather than small stature.

Tom cruise is a creepy twat and would be one if he was 10ft tall.

What's being challenged here is the must be 6ft tall bit. I don't believe it is true women are only interested in men who are at least 6 feet tall.

If the op had said straight women are generally only or at least are more interested in men who are taller than they are, I'd agree. I think a significant number of straight women do prefer men who are as tall or taller than them. Prefer does not even mean would not date if shorter though.

But the whole must be six feet tall or not interested claim?

Nah.

im 5”4 and my DP is 6”1. If anything I would prefer if he was a bit shorter. 5”10 is probably my ideal, but I wasn’t going to rule him out for being “too” tall, same as I wouldn’t rule someone out for being “too” short. It’s merely a preference.

I think it’s more of a thing on OLD than in the wild as you have nothing to go on other than a couple of photos and a few facts such as age, location, height. It’s human nature when faced with a sea of options to filter in some capacity so height is a common one. I doubt many women are meeting attractive, friendly, funny men in bars but saying no thanks you are an inch shorter than my criteria

DH is about same height as me I'm 5 ft 6 he's 5 ft 6.5. Kids have ended up about our height DD1 same DD2 few inches taller and DS about my height.

I'm not a big heel wearer due to own issues but I think DH being noticeable smaller than me - I may have found that off putting though not sure why.

IL are odd about height - FIL inordinately proud of being 6ft - yet own Dad and paternal GF were so it seems not such a big thing to me. Their comments over years have led me to worry about DS height a bit - though recently family event older ladies kept coming up and remarking on how handsome he was and he doing well academically and aiming for a well paid career - so hopeful.ly a non issue.

I did see data from decades back in USA that height and seniority and pay were related - but not sure that holds here or even there now - quick search found this:
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1184250/Size-matters-comes-salary-Tall-men-highest-earners.html

I think dating apps add extra blocks but not sure it's clear how successful they are anyway.

Rishi is not dishy.

You’re not ‘your’

I find a partner being taller than I am really awkward, to be honest. Hard to have a conversation or kiss if you're constantly on tiptoe.

But your very tall though.

IME when younger, female friends teens, early 20s went for more pretty boys, at the time it was Band members of Blur so quite pretty men, men that were cool with music tastes and could talk about interesting things like Art and politics but the biggest attraction point was definitely humour and if they could make you laugh. I think it is in no way an arbitrary 6ft and that will do, attraction is more dynamic than that imo, a boring 6ft man is just that.

The objectively most attractive man on earth is about 5’6”/7” ish. If you don’t know who that is I can’t help you.

But the whole, women have preferences which are mean and unkind, is a particular preoccupation with the incel crowd.

Commented on by who? Hollywood standards are not real life.

Again, wanting a man taller than you doesn't mean all men need to be 6ft because most women are not anywhere near 6ft, so the majority of the time "taller" means over 5'6 (or 5'9 if you wear heels).

I think it’s because Tom Cruise is a bit of a twat!

I think any preferences are fine. Every person I’ve ever discussed that with thinks that too.

Are you a bloke trying to point out double standards where there often aren’t any, by any chance?

btw I’m 5’6”. I’m happy with my height or over.

Whatever height people are it depends on their personality and how they carry it. Any height can be unattractive combined with the wrong attitude about it.

If a man is brave and good, I actually find combining this with being short an additional attraction.

I really get sick of people here accusing other Mumsnetters of secretly being men. All it really says is, “You’re not acting the way I think a woman ought to act, so you can’t really be one,” which is shitty.

The whole thing with only wanting to date men six feet or taller is a real phenomenon on dating apps, and noticing that doesn’t make someone a man. 🙄

I’m intrigued by the number of posters claiming this isn’t a thing - men’s height is constantly commented on, look at Tom Cruise, and it’s still incredibly unusual to see a man shorter than his partner (I have a lot of friends and only know one couple where she is taller than him but they’re both tall).

I don’t find short men attractive - I’m very tall and have always gone for men 6’ snd over. I think it’s a biological drive and I’m not going to override it 😄

I don’t think this is really a thing, OP. It seems to be something men trot out “oh women all want someone over 6’”, but I haven’t met any women who care meaningfully about that - many want someone at least as tall as them, but by no means all.

I personally don’t mind if men are tall or short or middling.

I do mind the two “syndromes” -

Short man syndrome - where a man clearly has issues about being short and is always trying to make up for it by being Uber aggressive and forever making about about how they won’t be crossed.

Tall man syndrome- when a man thinks being tall is an achievement and wants prizes for it - the most or only comfortable bed or seat, the front seat (they move forwards and backwards so no need whatsoever) etc

Your fantasy man is just that though. Fantasy. It doesn't mean anything.

My fantasy man is Ryan gentles, and my husband looks like Howard from the Halifax ads. And he's bloody fantastic!

I'd be interested to know the statistics on the 'arbitrarily-decided' searches on dating sites of the 6-foot requirement.

Truth be told, I think it's more psychological than anything... like how people statistically tend to pick 7 as a lucky number, or round a selection of objects to ten. I suspect 6-foot is nothing more than a convenient round number, because you're right... if the majority of women in the UK are 5'4... say 5'7 in heels... is a 5'10 man really not going to tick the box if she met him in person?

I'm 5ft and I don't believe I've ever met a full-grown man shorter than me! The year 5 & 6 kids at my sons primary school are taller than me!

My DP is 6ft, I didn't go out looking for a man of any particular height and his height was never a factor when starting a relationship with him. Although I will admit that it is nice having someone to reach the things on the high shelves for me!

No they’re not, my 5ft 8 husband is incredibly handsome, my son takes after him in looks, is just under 6ft and has absolutely no problem attracting girls but then again he’s interested in things other than looks, politics, music and is incredibly funny so maybe that is why he hasn’t been written off as just under 6ft🙄

Well, if there's anything I've learnt about the internet, it's that everyone is always honest about who they are......

(Quick someone, close the gate to the incel farm, one of 'em's wandered in)

The average height for a woman in the UK is 5'4.

So a man needs to be in average 5'5 or more to be taller than his female partner.

So very much not 6ft.