Thinking that women would benefit if they were more open minded about height in a potential partner…

Describing women not finding something attractive in a man as a hang up suggests that it's something they might need to work through to be more available and open to more men. It feels a little off to me, "women you're not obligated to date men you're not a attracted to, but have you considered working on yourself first

I agree with this. OP- did you unpick your prejudices and have a proper period of self examination before you got together with your 6'3" partner?

Which is the opposite of what you claimed a couple of pages back, whining about virginity (male, presumably) and hypergamy.

If it would benefit women to look beyond height then why didnt you?

AIBU thinking that men would benefit if they were more open minded about weight/being a similar age in a potential partner ...

It's a standard dating trope isn't it? Women want tall men. Men want thin women who are younger than them. Anyone with strict criteria about physical characteristics undoubtedly misses out on potential partners.

But on your point there was an article in the Guardian a few weeks ago https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2024/mar/22/i-will-never-understand-heterosexual-dating-cultures-obsession-with-height-just-get-a-footstool

I'd like someone taller than me when i wear my stupidly high heels (which is a rarity these days). As that would make me about 5ft 10, I'm 5ft6 and my highest heels are about 4inches, over 6ft would be perfect.

You still think putting up articles about fiction set in nonsensical versions of the 19th century proves anything? 🙄

Neither men nor women should feel obliged to date anyone they’re not attracted to, especially not because they pity them!

My original point is that we should pause and examine why we might be rejecting certain people with certain characteristics- such as height- to ensure there’s no hang ups that don’t really have much to do with innate attraction… I used the example of tattoos for me.

Why should they stop and pause and navel gaze to unpick why they don't find a man attractive?

Describing women not finding something attractive in a man as a hang up suggests that it's something they might need to work through to be more available and open to more men. It feels a little off to me, "women you're not obligated to date men you're not a attracted to, but have you considered working on yourself first".

There is a sligt danger in this. It suggests that a man who holds down a job, takes decent care of himself, does his share of housework or more and puts his partner first would automatially become a great catch. If he is not particularly charismatic or high rent means he has not that much money left over, they are still not going to be much of a catch "not having their sit together" in MN terms.

And how many men care about boob size? Or slim legs? And absolutely won’t date a taller woman??

having some sort of physical preference is normal.
and height is something that matters to some women.
So what? Why is that so bad or in any way unexpected?

being of average to somewhat below average height still doesn’t seem to prevent the vast majority of men (at least those I know) from being in happy relationships. It therefore doesn’t seem like a particularly insurmountable issue to me…

Thank you!
I have been in the position a few times of speaking to young men who are leaning a bit to the red pill. There are a few things that can help in my limited experience, but one horrible crude example is if they were given a restaurant voucher for a free meal anywhere, but 1 in ten restaurants they could go to would poison them.
Suddenly, it is not so tempting if you are not that hungry and the best restaurants are all taken.
Suddenly you have to be either really hungry or it has to be the perfect amazing restaurant.

Curious now. Before your current partner, if a man who was say, 5'4" had asked you out and was attractive and seemingly compatible with you, would you have dated him?

Why do you care?! Men generally are far more exacting, picky and obsessed with looks in women than women are in men. They fucking rate us out of 10 like animals 🙄.

I hope you have gone on a male dominated site to pick them up on this too op?

Are you both male?

Is that why you seem so up set that nasty women ‘needlessly’ exclude shorter men?

It is not about what should be allowed. It is about how reality is.
We all have shallow preferences and most have deeper ones too.
To a certain extent, this will reflect what people want in a relationship. Someone who wants a relationship with someone who is as small and weak is relating to the world differently to someone who wants a tall and strong partner. Someone wanting a stupider partner is relating differently that someone who wants a smart partner.

There is no unconditional love in this world and we need the circumstances for it to be there. Often men prioritise looks, youth and kindness more and women often prioritise height, wealth and status.

Small men would tend to have the complexes they do if it wasn’t.

No. The small men who do display the traits of ‘short men syndrome’ are not just made that way because everyone is so mean to them about their height. In most cases, the angrily bitter short man would be an angrily bitter tall man - just fixated on something else to justify it.

The whinging from gen Z men that women don’t want to date them is not because women are obsessed with hypergamy. The actual complaints (and sociological data) seems to point to a phenomenon where younger women aren’t interested in a lifetime of doing all the work to look after men while (too many) young men are doubling down on the ‘traditional’ patriarchal expectations and becoming very angry that women want and expect more than the role men want to assign them to.

In that context, ‘hypergamy’ isn’t bridgerton style ‘marrying up’ in a social hierarchy. The ‘up’ in 2024 is trying to find men who are looking to be equal contributors who view women as actual people. It’s having higher standards - and that isn’t going down well with some young men, whether they see themselves as ‘incels’ or not.

and not write off the majority of men who are under 6 foot (85%).

"Women shouldn't write off men shorter than 6 foot"

dates man who is 6'3"

😂😂😂

Your partner is 6’3? ?

😂

😂😂😂

Dont you see the hypocrisy here?

LMAO