To never contribute £ to a person leaving work collection ever again?

Oh, it sounds like this colleague 'needs to be needed'.

I have a colleague like this who organises the workplace..... everything. Gifts, charity fundraising, gardening at a hospice, raffle tickets.....the lost is endless. It's continually something every month and we've all got 'giving fatigue'.
Her personality is fake bubble and cheery, so no one likes to say no. But some people do. I'm one.

I turned down her offer of holding an International Women's Day sign and having my photo taken with it. There's no point in doing it , especially since manager's attitudes to women don't seem to change at my place of work. So I said No, and she axcept d I, but looked confused. 😂

That just makes you look a bit of dick though and it will just make them uncomfortable around you in the office going forwards . They really didn’t leave the company just for a leaving gift I’m sure. Sometimes things don’t work out and that’s life. As someone said do you ask for wedding presents back if someone divorces?

I would be jokingly asking them for my tenner back, honestly.

Yes. Definitely stop giving so much money. I'd sign a card and let that be that in the future.

My son recently restarted a job. When he left the staff bought him a cake to share and some chocolates plus a card so when he returned a few weeks later he bought a bigger cake and a bigger box of chocolates to share out. He is on a higher salary than most of the rest of the staff so felt a bit guilty

Throw in a couple of quid. £10 is way too generous.

Were they given cash or given a gift bought with the collection money?

We’ve had people leave - mostly to go to uni - then come back. We’ve done a collection for their leaving gift but if they leave again we don’t do another one!

Well you said you had to work extra hard because she left... 🤔
Totally unfair anyway, it shouldn't be on you to pick up the slack, but it's sorted now!

I've never worked a normal office job and didn't know this was a thing. Maybe for retirement, but not for leaving one job to go to another.

I'd reduce the amount you put in, just because it sounds like you've been overly generous until now.

I would find it irritating OP. And I say it’s fine to stop contributing globally to all requests. I have a very sweet conworker who alone has organized …Xmas for our boss….baby gift for 2nd baby…birthday for our boss..retirement for coworker…adopt a family for Xmas…and just yesterday texted me to ask…would you like to donate to purchase a peach tree for xxx’s FIL who died? We all including her dislike our boss and for good reason. The deceased FIL lives in another country. I texted back no thanks and as I did it I thought thank thank you MN for pointing out how this is perfectly fine to decline. The sweet coworkers love language is apparently gift giving and she picks overly sentimental tat. I never like the gift it’s always sit around knickknacks. And I’m not donating again in the future. Our boss has been demoted to staff and I’m going to say…no more boss Xmas gifts from me. And I actually like and enjoy my coworkers but gift giving is not my love language.

I genuinely do not understand what you are annoyed about? It's not like anyone intentionally ripped you off, it just happened. I'm sure the leaver/returner was really sad her new job didn't work out. What do you want? your money back?

Don't worry, when you leave I'm sure you will get the same treatment.

Similar happened at a place I worked once. Manager left to work at a difference branch, it didn't work out so he returned. I have never until this moment thought about his leaving gifts OR the farewell party we threw him.

Why haven't your company hired someone to fill the vacancy? They should have started as soon as the other left.

You shouldn't be expected to do someone else's job as well, I know it happens, but a month is too long.

You need to pull back from the job, the company and the colleagues a bit.
Give less money, chill out, do less.
Become less connected to it, then you won't have these worries. .

That was exactly me once. Came back after eight weeks away back into my old job. V embarrassed about the generous leaving gift but v happy to be back with a much nicer company. I just asked for no leaving gift when I finally left again four years later.

One place I worked had a scheme of collecting money off staff annually which was supposed to cover these sort of things - leaving gift, babies, weddings etc. Fine in principle but too many staff members dodged the request and never contributed. I put my share in for years but by the time I came to leave they'd abandoned the idea and I got nothing back. Slightly galling but what can you do?

I also think £10 is a bit overly generous. If everyone in a fair sized work team puts in £1 -5 then it's enough to get a decent gift.

I wouldn't blame future leavers for this one person. however, if this person decides to leave again (while you are still working there), I probably wouldn't contribute to theirs again.

We had someone do this once, and when she left the second time, she just received a bottle of wine and card.

I think you're making too much of this. They didn't do this all just to get a gift and it's not a lot of money individually. You chose to put in £10. Put in less in future if you think it's too generous.

Although I always contributed for fear of getting a reputation as tight, I always thought the idea of a leaving gift collection was a bit off, especially when the preferred gift was usually vouchers. In my workplace, almost everyone leaving was going on to a better paid position elsewhere but there was an expectation that one of the admin staff (who were already really busy) would take the time to organise a card/collection then everyone in the office (including the most junior staff) would contribute. So quite often the leaver received £££ in vouchers paid for mainly by lower paid staff, by way of congratulations on leaving for a much higher salary somewhere else in town. Personally, I think if the owners of the business felt the person leaving should be thanked for their efforts the business should buy them a gift and for everyone else a card and turning up for a goodbye drink is enough.

I’d be a bit annoyed but I don’t think the person would’ve left thinking they’d be coming back

Not practical for us as most teams are in different locations (and countries!)

With the added bonus it saves trees too! 🌲

Well she did you a favour by coming back so! 😄 And she won't need any training up. Everyone's a winner!

Except you. Sorry about your tenner...

Yabu it's just one of them things do you feel the same about wedding gifts when the couple divorce a few months later

A paper card would be better and more of a keepsake. There are some lovely ones for £1 - £1.50

Definitely contribute less in future! However if I was the colleague who left and came back I'd be quietly feeling very awkward about the fact people chipped in for a leaving gift. Perhaps they are well aware and quite uncomfortable about it but don't know how to raise it (if it should be raised at all, it's not like they asked for a gift). But this is life and sounds like a one-off.