Can you be friends with a young guy?

Because generally on MN a male 22 years senior to a young woman and having affection for her would be flamed!! Be honest!

Of course you can, although the lighting up your soul stuff sounds too intense, regardless of age and gender.

I seem to have become the aunty figure to several of my daughters male friends. They've been visiting since they were all at uni together and some if them come and talk to me about issues. I don't even have to offer advice that much, just listen while they go over it in their head. Once they've talked it through they usually have an answer and I get chocolate and flowers on my birthday/Christmas.

I agree. When DH was in his early 30s, his company acquired another company and there was a ‘team-building’ day of surpassing awfulness where he met a woman in her late 50s. They were good friends and saw one another outside of work until she died, far too young.

I tend to make friends because of shared interests or worldviews, or shared activities we both enjoy. Left-wing politics, literature and good restaurants aren't really limited to any particular demographic so when I was younger, I made friends with middle-aged people (at least I thought 30-year-olds were middle-aged when I was 20!) and now I'm in my late 30s I make friends with 20-somethings. Obviously both men and women. And as a PP said, in the workplace everyone is sort of ageless and you just end up bonding with whoever.

(It seems to be an article of faith elsewhere on MN that when younger men in relationships make good workplace friends it's never with middle-aged women... except it very often is, this kind of dynamic is quite common in my experience. DP's best workplace buddy is a brilliant and very formidable Greek lady in her 60s, I would like to be like her when I grow up.)

Your kids are young teenage so he's what, a decade older than them? He's more than a few years older. But also, why can't you have a friendship with someone a generation out? Certainly at work lots of the women I got on with had kids my age. I wouldn't have called them my bff but certainly in work we had a close relationship

Of course. My direct report is a man 30 years younger than me. We get on well, great vibe. Whyever not?

When I was in my 20s in London a very old couple were our near neighbours. They gave us 2 pieces of advice a) always take a blessing from anyone of any faith (we were all atheists) which isn't relevant here and 2)always make friends with people in the generations below. Because you might get to the point when all your contemporaries have died. I've failed conspicuously to follow their advice but they made a good point.
Don't let it tip over into something it's not tho

What if it was? A perfectly healthy and lively sounding friendship between two people of the opposite sex who happen to have a lot in common? What's your point?

I'm almost 63 and work somewhere where I am at least 20 years older than my colleagues. Due to the nature of our work we are an extremely close team. There is one team member I'm more close to and he is 33, married and has two kids (I'm also married with a DS24). He talks to me about everything and although he would deny it I think he sees me as a maternal figure. We even occasionally have a drink together.

There is nothing weird about our friendship. It's nothing sexual and everyone at work knows we are good friends. Both our other halves know we are good friends. The weirdness would be if we pretended we weren't friends. Sometimes you just find someone you get on with.

Intergenerational (or at least age difference) and opposite sex (or attracted sex) friendships are fine. I have several (past and present).

Saying someone is on the same "frequency" or "lights your soul" is erring towards inappropriate.

Not weird at all. I have friends of all ages and their sex doesn’t come into it.

Posts like this worry me, (not the OP herself), I am a bisexual woman and some of the logic here would suggest l can’t have any friends.

Absolutely, I adore one of my fellow workers, I was his boss for a while. We are absolutely on the same wavelength and talk or teams every workday. I spent a day cleaning his house when he moved. I am 59yo, he is 40yo.
I am happily married. He is divorced now but I hope he meets a nice someone very soon.

You found a person you enjoy having a conversation with. That's the only thing that is relevant. His age, sex or especially what others think about you is neither here nor there. Why do you care so much if other's judge?
I have a younger male friend. We are very close and this friendship is priceless to me. My partner took a bit of reassuring when we first started dating. Aside from that, couldn't care less what others think about it.

I think people become a bit ageless in the workplace. I am good friends with a couple of much younger people at work. Nothing weird about it.

I'm good friends with a 24 year old man I work with. I'm 40. He's gay though. It really shouldn't matter, but if I'm being totally honest I don't know if I'd feel as comfortable doing things like going out for drinks just the two of us and chatting about personal/emotional things if he was straight, I'm not sure. If something about the situation doesn't feel comfortable, OP then maybe you're developing a bit of a crush? Or are you worried people will think there's something going on between you?

It's more common than you think OP. I was proud of mine when he graduated, got a graduate job and got together with his work crush.

It's normal to have friends of all ages, male or female :)

People should be able to. Logically there's no reason it should be a problem.
For me though, the thought of being friends with someone only a few years older than my sons is too weird

I can't even articulate why it is weird, I just know that it is.

Which as a response to your question is about as much use as an ashtray on a motorbike!

One of my best friends in my 20s was a man in his 40s.

This. I have friends,both male and female of all different ages. I get on with people because I have things in common with them, not because of their ages.

And if this was a man and young woman?

Of course you can have opposite sex friends who are younger.

However if it’s starting to move to regular texting or deep emotional stuff you might want keep check that you’re not developing romantic feelings.