to expect host to let her party guests know that she has a no shoes policy?

No, I think it's on the hosts to let guests know if they have a house-rule like this.

If it matters to you so much that you'd tell people to remove shoes if they didn't realise, then you need to be pro-active and give them the heads-up first.

We're talking about a dress-up fundraising event, not a casual house party.

Vacuuming is hardly a big deal, and as for shampooing - it seems excessive, people wouldn't be turning up knee-deep covered in mud for a posh do 🙄. Pretty likely you'd have to hoover after an event with food and drink anyway.

Floors are for people.
People are not there for floors.
Some people just value possessions over any other consideration.

You could have indoor shoes for such occasions!

I don’t think it’s rude, or valuing the floors over guests. Floor coverings are expensive, plus who wants to vacuum or shampoo carpets after every gathering? The guests aren’t going to suffer discomfort - I think it’s inconsiderate of visitors not to offer to remove footwear, and they should bring some slippers ,indoor shoes or slip ons if they don’t want to go without footwear and have their bunions on display! There’s a middle ground here. Nothing to stop guests inquiring beforehand if shoes will need to be removed. If yes - fine , bring indoor footwear. If no - fine!

I wonder if the people buying these know that a nice pack of unopened mens socks would save the need to clean boots 😂

YANBU

I think it was quite rude of her to make people remove shoes when they are removing formal wear. Would have felt uncomfortable in this situation. She's obviously not comfortable with lots of people being in her house so she should have hired a hall or venue.

I would remove shoes if I went for coffee and there was a carpet. I wouldn't remove my shoes if it is a non-carpetted floor or a kitchen. I don't wear shoes in my house but I would never ask someone to removing shoes. It's rude. As a previous poster said, if you do this you value your own floors (which can be cleaned) over a guest's comfort.

I once heard of a woman who made guests wear shoe covers in the house!

I have mobility issues that are well hidden, unless I am barefoot. I have difficulty walking without my shoes, some of which are specially made. I even keep shoes by my bed so that even for a quick trip to the loo, I am shod. I think there are more people like me than you would think. I've never encountered a venue public or private where shoes were forbidden, but if I did, I would have to leave and not participate in the event.

I'm so sorry meant to say in my original.message YANBU OP, çheck all my spellings then miss that vital bit 🙄

I'm in Scandinavia. Almost no-one has carpet but still everyone takes their shoes off inside.

This happened to me. Luckily, I did not live far, so I went home and got shoe covers, which I keep under my sink for workers, put them on and went back into the party with my high heels and shoe covers. (The host was fine with it.)

Only it’s often not wholesome mud and damp! Even if dog mess has been cleaned up , traces remain, plus dog pee, not to mention some filthy person’s spit etc, and I don’t want shoes that have walked on that in my house. A door mat wont remove that, and I don’t intend to shampoo frequently.

Surely spilt food and drink is a greater threat to carpets than a bit of dirt which can be easily hoovered.

@celticprincess Exactly.And note my earlier point too about a sudden fire, premises plunged into darkness, everyone scrambling for shoes, some having to sit to put them on

All the people worrying about a bit of wholesome mud and damp must have led very sheltered lives about what people can shed from their feet.... forgot to mention the very common fungal infrction, very contagious athlete's foot, everyone's skin cells, verukahs etc.

And perhaps they haven't heard of doormats 🤔

I agree about the furniture Aspect. Most of our child guests slip their shoes off and I like this as they tend to play up in the bedrooms where we have carpet, or sit on furniture with feet tucked under little bottoms. But most of our adult guests couldn’t sit like that if they wanted to🤣.

A shoes off event is definitely casual not a posh event and I would go in jeans.

We don't wear shoes in our own home but I don't expect visitors to take theirs off - If they start taking them off I say the only people required to take shoes off are those who are likely to climb on the furniture - if you're just going to sit and chat without gymnastics you're fine to keep them on.

Yanbu op - knowing you can't wear shoes is a vital piece of clothing-decision info!

I agree. Some people will feel uncomfortable exposing their own feet, others might find it off-putting having to walk barefoot with lots of other shoeless people in a small space.
I also wonder what formal outfits would look like with bare feet or socks. It’s all just awkward and uncomfortable.
Taking your shoes off at a friend’s house is one thing, but at a formal event?

Sorry upper class shoes on!!

The class divide is clearly: upper class - shoes on (wouldn’t dream of being bad hosts, have wooden, stone floors with cleaners)

Lower middle class with carpets - shoes off.

Other cultures excepted.

Well I there possibly is except what’s confusing that is this was supposedly a “ posh” party 🤷🏻‍♀️

Well, feeling gutted could be easily avoided by not making guests feel awkward in the first place.
If it’s a formal event the majority of people wouldn’t expect to be asked to take off their shoes.

Would it be rude to say there seems to be some sort of class divide to this.

It was more like the huge whiff in the room!🤣

I think, though, this is where the problem with imposing the rule at a formal function begins. I don’t wear socks under formal footwear.

As someone noted upthread, although this thread is looking very polarised, there is actually a fair bit of middle ground: lots of people saying children should take shoes off inside and even prepared to ask children visiting to, as well as people having shoes off in their own homes. So it’s not all shoes on or shoes off. It’s a “time and place” contextual thing

YES let's make it happen filthy dirty red carpet 😷

Gosh, I have just realised how disgusting all those Hollywood stars are, walking the red CARPET in their filthy outdoor shoes.

Someone needs to stop this! If we all start to create a buzz now, I predict that next year’s big fashion hit at the Oscars will be #unopenedpackofmenssocks