Would you raise an eyebrow? Can’t work as teenager sick

Well especially if its not actually a migraine teen... broken leg/arm teen, of course no issue if sm...

Then surely it’s pointless as nobody is responding to what actually happened?

I'd be suspicious that the child is not ill at all to be honest. Does the team member have a record of being sick at busy times, or being very selective in their requests for days off?

You can get migraine with just disturbed vision and a headache. Usually it is a warning for a bigger one but sometimes it isn't but you can function.

My last one I could look at my phone despite feeling sick and ill and eventually puking. It depends on the individual. Other ones I have had I wouldn't have been able to.

Sometimes I can look at a screen. Sometimes I just need a distraction from the pain and boredom.

I have chronic migraine so rarely have a day off from either a full blown migraine or some combination of symptoms.

I’m not going to judge how anyone gets through it.

At my very worst the increased pain in my head from vomiting caused me to pass out.
I came round on the bathroom floor.
I could have choked on my own vomit!!!!
I am medicated against them and I have fewer to worry about.
If anyone was suffering a migraine like I used to I would not leave them alone.

Allegedly on sm, according to the children of the people who're complaining about the parent. Bloody hell @Asprogata just tell the staff member they and their child are the hot gossip topic at work, and that you're leading the witch hunt against them.
Hopefully in writing so they can have evidence.

Think that the key point.

I would be so upset if I found my manager crowdsourcing opinions on the legitimacy of my child’s illness 😬

It’s not a luxury. If your child is ill you do what you have to do.

I used to suffer with such regular debilitating migraines between 8-22 (touch wood only a couple a year now)

but if hes throwing up (water or bile could choke) slight noise or light would feel like a lazer. But in one of your posts said he was on Social media, get everyone is different but most people with a migraine can barely move or lift their head let alone look at a screen because its too bright so that sounds sus.

If they’re sick and cant move because laid up in bed etc its safer to have someone around.

ive friends who still suffer terribly, one has medical botox and one anti sickness injections and been hospitalised, and after its passed she’s out of action for a few days still.

if it is was just a headache sure at 16 deal with it but a migraine is not a headache Theyre debilitating especially at 16 when you need the added support. But the being able to be on socials seem sus.

So many people confuse a really bad headache or headache for an actual migraine and its infuriating 😅

Any normal parent would prioritise their child’s health over a day at work, FFS! And please don’t assume that because you’ve had migraines, everyone else can deal with them in the same way - they vary hugely. As PPs have said, unless your employee frequently makes suspicious excuses to miss work, you are being very unreasonable and highly unprofessional.

OP, you say I suffered crippling migraines during an extremely abusive childhood

I'm sorry to hear that. It sounds awful.

I wonder whether it may have coloured your view of how people can and should look after the people they love? The situation at work today must have been quite tough without your staff member in, I get that. All the same, there are times when it's more important to be there for a teenaged child. I guess your parents never showed that to you, which must be very painful for you even now.

I once had a migraine so bad that I couldn't see so yeah a legitimate reason to want to be with your child if they are suffering one.

Most people would not have the luxury of being off work in these circumstances

My eldest suffers from horrendous migraines. When he gets one, he disappears into his bedroom and sleeps for 24 hours, waking only to sip water, use the toilet and take painkillers (if he can keep them down). He's not on his phone or any other devices as he can barely see when he has one - and wouldn't feel able to even if he could see. I've always been on hand in case he needs me, and check on him at regular intervals in case he needs anything. So yes, it's entirely plausible that your employee needs to be with their child.

As a migraine suffered, no I absolutely would not raise an eyebrow because migraines are utterly vile and debilitating. I wouldn't care if I was the Queen, if my child had a migraine, even at 16, I would absolutely stay with them. Unless this is a regular occurrence and you can prove the child wasn't ill, I'd be telling other staff in the nicest possibly way to mind their own business.

Ordinarily I would say Yanbu but as a sufferer of migraines with aura I can confirm they’re deeply unpleasant.

I do remember though in work a few years ago a lady I worked with left work to go be with her daughter who had a sickness bug. The daughter was 30 and married. It did raise
a few eyebrows given that it wasn’t that serious and her husband was at home as well.

tbf if my had fuck all to do with me but my mum would not have done the same (despite being a very loving mother!)

No, that isn’t because it’s not hearsay.

Strongly agree.

If I were the staff member and I stumbled across this post, I'd know it was about me and my teenager, and I'd also cringe with embarrassment at my manager using a parenting website for advice on management.

so is the migraine

OP, it’s really neither here nor there. Your employee is allowed time off for dependents. You can raise eyebrows all you want but you are not at liberty to decide when a dependent is fit to self care nor, presumably, to alter your company or government policy.

Yes, the gripers may be grasping at imaginary straws.

Unfortunately DH has the type of job where he can’t stay at home when I have a migraine, but I wish he could. Instead he leaves me in bed with vomit bowls close by, pain killers to hand, ice packs on my head and I have to hope for the best.

DS1 has had horrendous migraines when he was a teenager and we’d have never left him alone, because we didn’t need to. Be a bit more understanding, OP.