Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to feel irritated by DH asking me to cover up when I don't want sex?

433 replies

RaspberryRippleDuvet · 14/04/2024 19:18

There are times of the month when I really don't want sex but my DH will still be really horny.

At these times he will tell me not to sit in a certain way that shows my curves, or he'll cover my legs with a blanket if I'm showing any part of them. When I seem irritated by this he says he finds it too hard to see me in any way he deems sexy as he knows he won't be having sex with me.

To be clear, I'm not attempting to 'tease' him in any way; I'm just going about my life.

AIBU to find this behaviour of his annoying and controlling? Or should I be more sensitive?

OP posts:
QueenBitch666 · 14/04/2024 22:18

Have dc with this rapey misogynist creep at your peril. Him and his uncontrollable dick will be off like a shot

ObliviousCoalmine · 14/04/2024 22:18

Absolute creep behaviour.

Tashbwth5656 · 14/04/2024 22:17

No no noooooo
I'm a female that served 13 years military and now have a successful career in a male dominated world and got a rosette as a chef......this to me seems like a religion ! Are you Muslim? If not get the fuck out!!!

Deathbyfluffy · 14/04/2024 22:17

lemmein · 14/04/2024 21:54

These posts make me despise men!

Don’t tar us all with the same brush - that’s like me despising all women because my ex cheated on me (which I don’t).

There’s some seriously creepy guys out there, but the majority of us are perfectly normal and can deal with our ‘urges’ without this nonsense.

Pantaloons99 · 14/04/2024 22:16

That makes me feel physically sick. I would struggle so much with this.

He isn't a dog, so I just can't believe any man can't control their sexual urges no matter how ' horny' he is.

You are right to feel uncomfortable about this. It feels manipulative. He has control.

PampasGrass · 14/04/2024 22:15

He’s not a wonderful husband. He’s a man who wants to live in America and wants you to sign up to the transformed wife on Facebook and see him as male leading the house and you say yes to sex whenever he’s wants it as he’s a man isn’t it.
But serisouly, he’s not a good husband if he acts like this, like he’ll attack you for normal behaviour.

Cherrysoup · 14/04/2024 22:15

What the fuck?! Maybe print a sign and hang it round your neck, OP. Yes on one side, no on the other like in those Brazilian meat restaurants. 🤣

MistyBerkowitz · 14/04/2024 22:14

MrsTerryPratchett · 14/04/2024 19:44

He needs to discover the Wonderful World of Wanking.

Many shitty, sexist religions are based on his premise. Control women because men are too stupid to control themselves. I don't buy into that.

This. Maybe suggest he wears a burqa with no eye mesh if he really can’t handle the sight of your body going about it’s normal business..

Beginningless · 14/04/2024 22:12

I’m amazed you want to have sex with him any of the rest of the time. This old school idea that men have these uncontrollable urges that women are responsible for. No basis in reality, entirely constructed by sex pests like him to coerce women into sex.

hottchocolatte · 14/04/2024 22:11

Does he have no self control?

Very odd

how does he cope if he sees someone in revealing clothing out and about?

ohthejoys21 · 14/04/2024 22:09

VickyEadieofThigh · 14/04/2024 19:21

Jeez, who are you married to - Benny Hill?

Grin
Letsgocamping67 · 14/04/2024 22:05

Do not have DC with this man. He will be off like a rabbit on heat looking elsewhere when you are busy with being heavily pregnant or with young DC.

unsync · 14/04/2024 22:04

A 'wonderful husband' does not pester his wife for sex whenever he is unable to control himself. You are being sexually abused. Women's Aid will be able to help you with your next steps. It is shocking when you realise this is your reality. I was shocked when I realised it. Hopefully you can do something about it before he escalates, as realising your husband is a rapist is hard to get your head around.

Mumoftwo2022 · 14/04/2024 22:03

🤮

KimFan · 14/04/2024 22:01

He sounds gross.

ChangeAgain2 · 14/04/2024 22:00

I read this and actually vomited a bit in my own mouth.

Vomit Barf GIF
Houseinawood · 14/04/2024 22:00

ExtraOnions · 14/04/2024 19:21

The behaviour of a sex pest, that would have my vagina clamping shut

This what is he implying that your legs mean he can’t control himself that you need a coat zipped up to the neck. Never heard of this and I would not tolerate it

rainbowbee · 14/04/2024 22:00

Ihearyousingingdownthewire · 14/04/2024 21:14

“Cover yourself up you selfish bitch, otherwise I might be forced to rape you..”

That is basically how I’m reading this. Absolutely fucking horrified.

This. Just get it over with and get rid of the creep. What tf went wrong with men?

Inyourwildestdreams · 14/04/2024 21:59

RaspberryRippleDuvet · 14/04/2024 19:28

It's like he becomes a different person when he's sexually frustrated. He's normally a wonderful husband but if he's horny and I'm not then he gets really strange. It's like a personality change.

@RaspberryRippleDuvet aside from being absolutely vile…this is actually pretty worrying behaviour IMO.

out of interest…how long have your u been together?

Takeoutyourhen · 14/04/2024 21:59

Yuck.
Hope he doesn’t run up the stairs after you when he knows you are getting ready for bed. Been there…
It is so disrespectful! Although these kind of men would maintain that it’s disrespectful for them to not be able to get what they want.

lemmein · 14/04/2024 21:54

These posts make me despise men!

Sharkysharky · 14/04/2024 21:52

ExtraOnions · 14/04/2024 19:21

The behaviour of a sex pest, that would have my vagina clamping shut

And would make that sound like the vaults being closed in Harry Potter films. Or a dungeon door being closed and locked, plus a bit of an echo.

He sounds bonkers.

Sauvblanctime · 14/04/2024 21:49

Errr.

I bet he also says it’s the woman’s fault when she gets raped because her outfit was too revealing

Daisybuttercup12345 · 14/04/2024 21:49

He sounds repulsive.

35965a · 14/04/2024 21:49

This word is overused here but that is so grim

Swipe left for the next trending thread