Friend is exceptionally tight!

You need to be stronger, when you go into a bar, say I’ll have a gin and tonic, but just going to the loo. Either that or you all bring cash and each put £10 in a pot. We’ve known family members like this, I’m afraid we don’t let it happen. Meals are divided up, although we do take onboard if someone isn’t drinking alcohol, if anyone doesn’t want to do it that way, then we pay for our own meals. PS my DH is so soft, he’s the first to pay for drinks and can’t be bothered with the hassle, that’s why we never had money. We also have a friend who gets a calculator out when the bill arrives, DH can’t stand this and will go to the toilet and come back when it’s been sorted.

I'm maybe a bit too generous but it is starting to wind me the fuck up.

Well it only took you 10 years!!

Presumably she counts her £600/mth savings as part of her budget and has got into the thinking that this is non-negotiable. So really, by subsidising her when she socialises, you're actually putting money into her savings for her.

Just stop and say money is tight for you, and you can't afford to pay for two people on a night out.

Why do you keep subbing her when she's ungrateful and can afford her own? Serious question, why are you doing it?

Urgh I had a similar mate.. Would go on her online banking at the cafe then moan she only had £2.75...so I paid.. Without resentment.. 3 days a week, coffee here, lunch there.. Even her parking ticket.. She came to expect it.
Until the day she rocked up in a Mercedes convertible with private plate.. I backed away sharpish. Piss taker. The ultimate cf....
Have posted this before and got accused of lying.. It's a true tale. Haven't seen her for 8 years..

What are the situations? Ordering food I’m going to order x and I’ll tell them that we’re paying for our own or I’m paying for mine as soon as I’ve ordered.
in a pub - im
just getting myself a drink. If she asks for one say’ I’ve got into this bad habit where I always pay haven’t I? I’m just buying my own but if you want to get mine then yes I’ll have a x’
Repeat
What would she say if you don’t pay?

Nothing wrong with being careful with money. But you should NEVER expect friends to subsidise your lifestyle

You’re not being generous - you’re being daft, and being taken advantage of.

Not any more, but I used to have a colleague who came to the pub most lunchtimes, always accepted drinks and never bought a round.

None of the others would ever challenge him on it, but one day I decided I'd had enough and said "Fred, I think it's your round, you haven't bought a drink all week." Unfortunately, he'd come out without his wallet, but I lent him £10* so he could get a round in. He paid me back, and I did this every time until he started buying a round regularly.

Try doing something similar - just tell her it's her turn to pay for the drinks or whatever.

*It was a long time ago, and beer was under £2 a pint!

You need to stop paying for her drinks etc. She takes the piss because you let her.

Just say you are skint and getting your own.

YANBU. She’s not only tight she is taking advantage of you!

She is treating you like a mug.

Go to the bar and just tell her "I'll have a gin and tonic please". If she refuses and moans about money then buy yourself a drink and order her a glass of tap water and tell her you have a huge mortgage and cannot afford to pay for her drinks.