Friend is exceptionally tight!

I have a friend like this who doesn't contribute to parking. I drive to the beach most Sunday's with my dog and invited her along. I always pay for the parking, we always get a coffee too but she never ever offers to go halves on the parking or at least buy me a coffee. So I have stopped asking if she wants to come.

Why? Why on earth would you do this? Being tight is an extremely unattractive quality.

We used to have a couple friend like that. Used to being the operative words. It just got so annoying in the end that we just stopped talking to them as we felt used.

Yep.

" Does anyone else have people like this?!"

Nope and if i did I wouldn't let it go for 10 years.

OP, if you make a doormat of yourself, especially a financial one, people are always going to wipe their stingy feet on you.

Time to tell her, time for you to pay your share. You can say it nicely, but make it crystal clear that That Is It! No excuses.

If she doesn’t like it, then quite frankly she can sod off and find another mug.

Yes I used to have a housemate / friend like this.

Would happily let me pay for things, if I gave them a fiver to buy a drink for me (showing my age…) they wouldn’t never give the change…

But, if they bought eg some hand soap for the housing they’d be agitating for my 25p share.

You just have to restructure your behaviour around them. It is boring though, I can see it would impact the relationship long term. Imagine a holiday with them - argh!

Another day - another MN doormat

F

Just stop allowing it to happen. You’re adding about £10 a month to her
£600 savings

"Does anyone else have people like this?!"

No, because I don't lube myself up and let people shaft me.

At some point it becomes your own fault that people take the piss.

Every day on here now there's a post from someone who lets their so called 'friends' trample all over them. Why? I just don't get it. Buy your own food and drink. If she can't afford it then she'll have to stay in.

I remember many years ago, one person in my friendship group was tight, too. Same kinds of scenarios as above. One night, we'd all had a couple of drinks and one friend turned on the tight one and really had a go at her, calling her a 'tightarse and skinflint' and a few other worse insults.

None of us saw the tight mate much after that. But she had deserved it. I was in awe of the friend for speaking up.

10 years and you have never actually said "you owe me for x years of drinks"?

Stop being so soft, it's ridiculous

Stop inviting her out. Or only meet up in homes so it’s a cup of tea on the sofa. Or just buy your own from now on and leave her to sit with nothing or get something herself. You don’t need to do anything or have a bit discussion. Just a simple, “I’ve only brought enough to pay for myself.” And buy your own stuff.

I'm tight & live with a tight bloke.

This is different, it's being an entitled user.

It's not fair.

Stop inviting her out.

If she asks why she's not being invited just say you can't afford to pay for her anymore.

Just stop buying her stuff. Buy your own drinks and food, always. Don't pay for hers and then you won't need to "remind" her that she owes you a drink.

You and your other friend who pay for everything, both need to agree on a plan. So when you go out, you each queue up and pay for your own. Neither of you pay for third friend. I am sure she will miraculously find the money rather than sit there with nothing.

You will have to be tough but its the only way to stop her taking the piss.

£20 a month x 10 years is £2500!

Very generous!

We have a woman at work who does this to younger members of staff, forgets her bank card or it’s not working, there’s a block on it, hasn’t picked her fags up, if your going to the shop can you get me… and doesn’t pay.

I’m a bit more straight forward so I head her off with a ‘you owe me X’
I brought a young girl a cigarette case that holds 3 fags so she can’t sponge.

CF everywhere!

Why didn't you stop after the first night?

As for the cocktail guy, I have no words. He must have enjoyed his night all the more for knowing he was ripping you off.

YABU to continue this for 10 years. Stop now and if she still expects it, drop her as a friend.

I've bought her so many drinks/food in the past and in the 10 years I've known her, she has never returned the favour,

I don’t really understand why you don’t stop years ago??

Go into a pub-just buy your own drinks.

Eat at a cafe/restaurant-get the bill and tell the waiter you’ll be splitting it two ways.

Why would you carry on like this?

Stop paying for everything for her, she’s taking the piss of you and you’re just letting her. Put your foot down.

Reminds me of a date I went on with this guy.

He made me buy the first round and he ordered a very expensive cocktail.

On his round I ordered a large G&T but he bought be a small one then got himself a glass of tap water.

My round next and he orders another expensive cocktail...

Oh and then guess what - he didn't fancy another drink.

I half wondered if he was really struggling for money. I later found out from someone else he was just really tight! There was no second date!