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Original poster

I have 4 dogs and husband hates them all

186 replies

Ndhu · 13/04/2024 09:06

So, I'm a dog trainer and a mum.

I have 4 dogs.... before my husband married me he knew I was in love with animals.
6 years down the line and he hates everything about animals.

He hates the fact I have my dogs even though I walk them. Feed them. Keep them out of his way...
Pick the poo up...
Clean the house....
And deal with my children.

I adopted our 4th dog a while ago as she was feral and I put a lot of hard work into her...

I've offered him to get rid of our other dog who is 6 months old and isn't adjusting well to the house but he wants this one dog gone....

I'm torn, I really am as this dog means the world to me.....

Am I being unfair?

OP posts:
ChimneyPot · 13/04/2024 09:34

Your DH agreed to you fostering this dog not keeping it.
Keeping it needs to be a joint decision if you want to stay married.

fieldsofbutterflies · 13/04/2024 09:33

No, it was a discussion. I work with a rescue and told him the situation and he was fine with it.

But you know he doesn't like dogs so why was it even a discussion? Stop bringing dogs home! Four is enough.

Original poster
Ndhu · 13/04/2024 09:33

Mrsjayy · 13/04/2024 09:31

So you are a dog behavioural trainer? are you out of the house a lot do you just work for the rescues do the dogs you have at home part of your job or are they permanent pets?

My dogs they come to work with me.
I use my dogs to help other dogs.
The dogs are all well trained etc they have never caused a problem.
The house does not smell, I am constantly cleaning when I'm home so I'm on top of everything whilst being a mum and working.

OP posts:
MooseAndSquirrelLoveFlannel · 13/04/2024 09:33

If he knew, and you discussed and agreed and he was happy and willing to have the dog zoo in your home, something has changed clearly.

I mean, if you train rescue dogs, presumably you don't keep them? Maybe he is getting fed up with the merry go round of dogs? Or maybe he just doesn't like that dog?

Either way, you need to talk because as you keep saying over and over and over and over and over and over you're a dog trainer, this dog is lovely and you've trained it up to be a wonderful animal, therefore if this is the case something has changed.

FiveShelties · 13/04/2024 09:32

So you have a six month old dog that you are prepared 'to get rid of'?

Catza · 13/04/2024 09:31

You keep evading the question about arrangements. Is it a foster dog (which, I assume is what he agreed to with the implication that the dog will eventually move on) or did you now move the goalposts and adopted the dog?

Mrsjayy · 13/04/2024 09:31

So you are a dog behavioural trainer? are you out of the house a lot do you just work for the rescues do the dogs you have at home part of your job or are they permanent pets?

newnamechange98 · 13/04/2024 09:30

So from Op's posts her husband does no house work, not much parenting of their children and complains about the dog.

Not sure what the husband is actually bringing to the equation.

GenerousGardener · 13/04/2024 09:30

He knew who you were and what you did when he married you. He can’t change the goalposts now. It’s not like he’s just discovered you love dogs is it? I wouldn’t be getting rid of any dogs. You sound like an amazing person OP, working with rescues and turning dogs lives around. Your OH clearly doesn’t see you in the same light. He needs to think carefully about his future…..

CeciliaMars · 13/04/2024 09:30

I think you're being unreasonable. You are a huge dog person; he clearly is not. You have clearly fairly recently taken in two more dogs since you've been with him, and this is obviously too many for him. I love dogs but would find more than 2 in a household way too much. They are gorgeous and wonderful but also expensive, need loads of looking after and cleaning up after. It sounds like you want to own as many dogs as you want with no thought to your husband's wishes, and now you're on here trying to get people to back up your sense of being in the right.

Deebee90 · 13/04/2024 09:30

If you foster this dog and you say many many times they are great then isn’t it time to find a home for the dog. You are losing your marriage here over dogs. I think you need to step back and Decide what comes first your family or your bloody dogs. Sounds like he just agreed with you on the dog as he didn’t want the argument.

fieldsofbutterflies · 13/04/2024 09:28

I also work with dogs but I wouldn't keep bringing random dogs home if I knew my DH wasn't keen, no matter how much he said it was okay. It wouldn't be fair, no matter how lovely their temperaments.

You also say you brought this new dog in as a foster but now she seems to be a permanent fixture? Did your DH agree to that or did he just believe it was temporary?

I think a lot of your posts are a bit disingenuous- you know he's not keen so why do you keep pressuring him and asking to bring more dogs in to the house?

newnamechange98 · 13/04/2024 09:28

Soubriquet · 13/04/2024 09:08

Keep the dogs, boot the husband

First comment has nailed it

Summergarden · 13/04/2024 09:28

Tbh I think even most dog lovers would end up fed up of dogs if they had to live with FOUR of them…

ShowOfHands · 13/04/2024 09:28

I've offered him to get rid of our other dog who is 6 months old and isn't adjusting well to the house

What does not adjusting well look like?

Original poster
Ndhu · 13/04/2024 09:27

kitsuneghost · 13/04/2024 09:20

I wouldn't move in with a dog lover but your husband did, so in this respect YANBU.
However did you discuss the introduction of a feral dog or you did you just rock up with it.
Also agree with PP that you shouldn't be bringing a feral dog into a house with children.

No, it was a discussion. I work with a rescue and told him the situation and he was fine with it.

The dog is fine with children and is completely different.
I do work with dogs etc so he's aware of my job and roles with rescues

OP posts:
MyOtherCarisAVauxhallZafira · 13/04/2024 09:26

I couldn't live with 4 dogs, the hair and smell and constant, we need to get back for the dogs would be too much for me. One permanent dog seems reasonable especially as you also have fosters you train, 4 is just too many.

Original poster
Ndhu · 13/04/2024 09:25

raspberryberet7 · 13/04/2024 09:25

What is your job op I don't think you've mentioned it!

I am a dog behaviourist/ trainer.

OP posts:
MidnightPatrol · 13/04/2024 09:25

I’m an animal lover but four dogs is too many dogs.

And bringing home a feral one… I mean, no I don’t think I’d be too happy about that either.

Mrsjayy · 13/04/2024 09:25

It sounds like it's all got too much for him he's probably agreed because the dogs are your passion, has he maybe seen something in the latest dog that you haven't? Is it maybe a bit more aggressive than he thought. I really think you should stop bringing dogs into the house.it doesn't sound like he copes and the 4th is the final straw.

Original poster
Ndhu · 13/04/2024 09:25

DoreenonTill8 · 13/04/2024 09:23

But do you also work for the household and not just for the dogs? If so great.

Show quote history

Yes, of course...

OP posts:
raspberryberet7 · 13/04/2024 09:25

What is your job op I don't think you've mentioned it!

Original poster
Ndhu · 13/04/2024 09:24

TheBottomsOfMyTrousersAreRolled · 13/04/2024 09:22

My first thought too.

is he not your children’s father either? And is he doing jo housework?

Show quote history

Yes, he's the children's father.

No house work no, I take on it all plus work and be mum lol

OP posts:
bridgetreilly · 13/04/2024 09:24

OP, you are not listening. You just keep repeating how great this dog is.

What about your DH, is he great? Does he matter or only the fact that you work with dogs? Apparently he agreed to everything, and yet he has become someone who ‘hates animals’. Can you not see that you are the one who has made him feel like that?

DoreenonTill8 · 13/04/2024 09:23

Ndhu · 13/04/2024 09:22

I work for my dogs. So he dosent have to.
It's not a large amount as they're all kept healthy and do have insurance incase anything happened.

Holidays, we don't really go on as he just wants to work or sit at home on the PlayStation.
I've offered dog sitters but he dosent want people in the home. ..

Show quote history

But do you also work for the household and not just for the dogs? If so great.

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