Page 5 | I have 4 dogs and husband hates them all

Ndhu · 2024-04-13T08:06:59+00:00

So, I'm a dog trainer and a mum. I have 4 dogs.... before my husband married me he knew I was in love with animals. 6 years down the line and he hates everything about animals. He hates the fact I have my dogs even though I walk them. Feed them. Keep them out of his way... Pick the poo up... Clean the house.... And deal with my children. I adopted our 4th dog a while ago as she was feral and I put a lot of hard work into her... I've offered him to get rid of our other dog who is 6 months old and isn't adjusting well to the house but he wants this one dog gone.... I'm torn, I really am as this dog means the world to me..... Am I being unfair?

Mrsjayy · 13/04/2024 09:47

Pinkdelight3 · 13/04/2024 09:44

And you've fostered the dog and done the work now so someone else could've adopted the dog. You're being deliberately disingenuous because you want the dog.

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Yes, move the dog on if it's ready surely if the op is a trainer and works with rescue she can offer extended support to a new owner .

Catza · 13/04/2024 09:47

Looks like we will never find out the answer to the foster/adoption question. So my best guess is that your husband agreed to foster, you decided to keep the dog indefinitely, your husband objected as this wasn’t the agreement and now you are being deliberately evasive because you want us to agree that your husband is the unreasonable one. I see you.

bridgetreilly · 13/04/2024 09:46

I'm torn, I really am as this dog means the world to me.....

Clearly it means more than your husband.

Am I being unfair?

Yes. And completely ignoring everyone who points that out.

fieldsofbutterflies · 13/04/2024 09:46

Ndhu · 13/04/2024 09:41

Nope.
She had resource guarding when she arrived.
She had dog reactivity.
She didn't know a home.

Now, she is currently sleeping on the floor whilst my children play with not a care in the world.
I bring her to work, if dogs fights she would rather chew grass and run around....so yeah, completely different dog.

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That’s amazing.

It sounds like she’s more than ready to move on as per your original agreement - so why aren’t you finding her a home?

MooseAndSquirrelLoveFlannel · 13/04/2024 09:45

Ndhu · 13/04/2024 09:41

Nope.
She had resource guarding when she arrived.
She had dog reactivity.
She didn't know a home.

Now, she is currently sleeping on the floor whilst my children play with not a care in the world.
I bring her to work, if dogs fights she would rather chew grass and run around....so yeah, completely different dog.

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Then she is ready to be rehomed, which is surely the arrangement you have as you can't keep all the dogs you train?!

You have said nothing nice about your husband, but endlessly complemented the dogs. Clearly you love the dogs more than your husband, so maybe this marriage isn't what you want anymore and your husband is fed up as well.

Pinkdelight3 · 13/04/2024 09:44

Mrsjayy · 13/04/2024 09:42

But 4 month old puppy is different to an 8 month puppy he's allowed to change his mind,

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And you've fostered the dog and done the work now so someone else could've adopted the dog. You're being deliberately disingenuous because you want the dog.

SnugglyJumpersMakeItBetter · 13/04/2024 09:44

As you've reformed your latest, why not find her forever home? That's the point of fostering isn't it?

DoreenonTill8 · 13/04/2024 09:44

How old are the dc and how do they manage any activities/socialising if the dogs are always with you?

Comedycook · 13/04/2024 09:44

You shouldn't have brought the last dog in. Your dh had decided to tolerate the dogs and you moved the goalposts.

fieldsofbutterflies · 13/04/2024 09:43

Ndhu · 13/04/2024 09:39

As I work with the rescue.... I'm not just a normal foster.

She couldn't go with a normal person lol

She needed training 😩 and I told him how she was what she was and he said okay

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But don’t you understand that it wasn’t fair to ask him in the first place? Because you put him in a situation where he was forced to agree to keep you happy. It’s manipulative.

You can’t save every single dog that comes into rescue and needs help. You were wrong to even consider taking on this new dog, especially as you say you also have another dog into the house who is struggling to settle.

bridgetreilly · 13/04/2024 09:43

Have a look at your posts, @Ndhu. They are all about the dogs.

But your post is about your husband. You just don’t actually sound like you care about him at all.

historygeek · 13/04/2024 09:42

You keep stating you work for rescues.

Do you take dogs in, train them in the home, and then they go to a forever home? A bit like people that train guide dogs.

Or do you take dogs home from the rescue that no one would want and then keep them?

Mrsjayy · 13/04/2024 09:42

Ndhu · 13/04/2024 09:39

As I work with the rescue.... I'm not just a normal foster.

She couldn't go with a normal person lol

She needed training 😩 and I told him how she was what she was and he said okay

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But 4 month old puppy is different to an 8 month puppy he's allowed to change his mind,

Pinkdelight3 · 13/04/2024 09:42

Ndhu · 13/04/2024 09:38

I'll agree to disagree....

You can walk around with white socks and leave with white socks.... I do a lot to make my house clean and healthy:)
Especially as I have children. When eating, the dogs go to their crates on their own.
When guests the dogs know to wait until their welcomed in. So, it's hard to explain on text... but yeah, I do a lot to keep them lol

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Perfect example of the dog-lover delusion. Of course your house smells of dog. One dog makes a house smell. Four dogs?? C'mon. The fact you think it doesn't makes me doubt how reasonable you are across the board. Sounds like he might have another take on how these 'discussions' go and what was actually decided, but you do what you want because you're dog-mad and he knew it so he has to suck it up. It is of course his cross to bear as he married you and knew what you were like but still, it's hard to sympathise with you keep adding more dogs because, basically, you want to.

Original poster

Ndhu · 13/04/2024 09:41

Mrsjayy · 13/04/2024 09:39

Is the 4th puppy aggressive/jumpy/bitey?

Nope.
She had resource guarding when she arrived.
She had dog reactivity.
She didn't know a home.

Now, she is currently sleeping on the floor whilst my children play with not a care in the world.
I bring her to work, if dogs fights she would rather chew grass and run around....so yeah, completely different dog.

OP posts:

Whaleandsnail6 · 13/04/2024 09:40

When you discussed taking the dog in, was it put to him that it would be a temporary foster? If so, then I dont think its unreasonable in him wanting to stick to this arrangement. In all honesty, were you hoping from day one that he would relent and want to keep her?

If it was only ever a temporary measure in having her, I'd adopt her out and not bring any more dogs into the household. That is if you want to keep the relationship with your husband...if you aren't happy with him, you could always end your relationship and have as many dogs as you want.

MooseAndSquirrelLoveFlannel · 13/04/2024 09:40

Ndhu · 13/04/2024 09:38

I'll agree to disagree....

You can walk around with white socks and leave with white socks.... I do a lot to make my house clean and healthy:)
Especially as I have children. When eating, the dogs go to their crates on their own.
When guests the dogs know to wait until their welcomed in. So, it's hard to explain on text... but yeah, I do a lot to keep them lol

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You can't agree to disagree, its a fact. Dogs smell.

That doesn't mean your house is dirty, dogs have an odour. You won't notice, you're nose blind to it now.

But dogs smell....fact!

Original poster

Ndhu · 13/04/2024 09:39

fieldsofbutterflies · 13/04/2024 09:37

You’re missing the point again.

You know your husband isn’t keen on dogs and still decided you needed to bring a fourth dog into the house (hence the “discussion”). Why didn’t you just leave it and find another family to foster her? Why did it have to be you?

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As I work with the rescue.... I'm not just a normal foster.

She couldn't go with a normal person lol

She needed training 😩 and I told him how she was what she was and he said okay

OP posts:

Mrsjayy · 13/04/2024 09:39

Is the 4th puppy aggressive/jumpy/bitey?

Original poster

Ndhu · 13/04/2024 09:38

MooseAndSquirrelLoveFlannel · 13/04/2024 09:36

Only dog owners think their house doesn't smell. Dogs smell, full stop. Doesn't matter how much you clean. You won't notice as you're around dogs all the time.

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I'll agree to disagree....

You can walk around with white socks and leave with white socks.... I do a lot to make my house clean and healthy:)
Especially as I have children. When eating, the dogs go to their crates on their own.
When guests the dogs know to wait until their welcomed in. So, it's hard to explain on text... but yeah, I do a lot to keep them lol

OP posts:

TheHeadOfTheHouse · 13/04/2024 09:37

It’s unusual for a dog lover to use the term “get rid” 🤔

also I would really struggle to live with that many dogs. He did however accept you as a dog lover and your job when he met you.

your house will smell with 4 dogs, regardless of how much you clean. You will be nose blind to it.

Mrsjayy · 13/04/2024 09:37

Ndhu · 13/04/2024 09:33

My dogs they come to work with me.
I use my dogs to help other dogs.
The dogs are all well trained etc they have never caused a problem.
The house does not smell, I am constantly cleaning when I'm home so I'm on top of everything whilst being a mum and working.

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Ah so they are out of the house when you are fair enough, It sounds like he is just done with dogs and the last puppy was a pup too far. He sounds like he wants a quiet life to do what he wants his laziness sounds unacceptable to me.

fieldsofbutterflies · 13/04/2024 09:37

Ndhu · 13/04/2024 09:34

I'm not bringing more dogs home?

It was a discussion because the 4th had issues and he agreed to it, so hence whilst she's now here.

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You’re missing the point again.

You know your husband isn’t keen on dogs and still decided you needed to bring a fourth dog into the house (hence the “discussion”). Why didn’t you just leave it and find another family to foster her? Why did it have to be you?

MooseAndSquirrelLoveFlannel · 13/04/2024 09:36

Ndhu · 13/04/2024 09:33

My dogs they come to work with me.
I use my dogs to help other dogs.
The dogs are all well trained etc they have never caused a problem.
The house does not smell, I am constantly cleaning when I'm home so I'm on top of everything whilst being a mum and working.

Show quote history

Only dog owners think their house doesn't smell. Dogs smell, full stop. Doesn't matter how much you clean. You won't notice as you're around dogs all the time.

Original poster

Ndhu · 13/04/2024 09:34

fieldsofbutterflies · 13/04/2024 09:33

No, it was a discussion. I work with a rescue and told him the situation and he was fine with it.

But you know he doesn't like dogs so why was it even a discussion? Stop bringing dogs home! Four is enough.

I'm not bringing more dogs home?

It was a discussion because the 4th had issues and he agreed to it, so hence whilst she's now here.

OP posts: