To worry about my kid's intelligence?

most likely inattentive adhd.
even if the school haven't flagged anything go private with an ed psych. and have her assessed.
unlikely to be an intelligence/cognitive issue.

Tbh I’ve no advice … but can say this .. your daughter will get to the best she can be and the reason for this is because she has you backing her up all the way .

I would say, based on everything you have said, that there do appear to be some developmental delays with your dd. However these could be due to a range of possible reasons, not only cognitive intelligence.

It is great that your family is now on an investigative pathway and that support for your dd will become more accessible.

I hope you are feeling ok. My son is neurodiverse and 'red flags' were first raised with me by his school when he was 5. It was a shock and I experienced quite a complicated emotional reaction, including worry, guilt and distress, so I know it can be difficult news.

Yes, at this stage of Reception she should definitely be able to write her name and other basic words (even putting them into simple sentences), follow basic stories and patterns, and read some basic words.

I would echo pp that your first step is to have a meeting with the class teacher to discuss this further and see if senco needs to be involved.

Surely, your first port of call is a meeting with her class teacher and the school SENCo?

CBeebies - Alphablocks and Numberblocks are really great, as a PP said. Only short and fun. In fact loads of the Cbeebies output is fab (you probably know!)

My son has some mild learning difficulties, at year 3 (age 8) we are still reading picture books. He’s just started stage 2 reading books and struggles, he can write a basic sentence when coping or tracing the letters. He also still has some speech therapy and gets upset if you can’t understand him however he’s progressing at his level so we not concerned and neither is his teachers (sen school for autism).

my friend is a primary school teacher and her advice to me was to have fun with the learning they’s no good pushing it but if the child is having fun that’s the main thing. She also mentioned that a lot of the kids in reception start at completely different stages and a lot of it is teaching basic skills such as sitting and listening. I would discuss with your daughters school to see what they advise.

I recommend the orchard toys games but keep to the level she’s working at nothing too advanced. The same with books we don’t read chapter books with DS yet and he won’t sit through a Disney film. Blippi is meant to be great for help with speech as he sounds everything out

@Booboobunnywoo does this resonate?

https://contact.org.uk/conditions/aphasia/

She needs a full assessment for physical eg ABC MOVEMENT BATTERY and educational. (Standardised verbal and non verbal testing and speech and language)
To see which areas are a struggle and which are not. Get a baseline. Have a plan . Is her clumsiness worsening or stable?

Everyone seems determined to tell you that your daughter is probably still very clever, but I think it's reasonable (if there are no issues with motor skills or a difficult or premature birth) to assume that she may simply have a lower than average IQ. Which is fine. So does almost half the population, and she doesn't sound seriously behind all other children of her age. If she's otherwise happy and developing normally then I don't think there's anything particularly that you can or need to do. You sound like a lovely and caring mum and are already offering all the right kinds of stimulation.

Honestly even if she does struggle academically it makes little difference in the long game.
Yes school will be her nemesis but she will find her friends and it won't stop her being a hard working, productive member of society, having a relationship or being a decent human being.
It's horrible now when you feel they are behind but in 15 years when some of the brightest and best are derailed by life and the kids are making their own choices, you'll see that these early years are just that. Part of a journey not the be all and end all.

The chapter books you’ve described are higher level (my 9 year old average reader chooses those to read) but some of the rest sounds a little like there may be some difficulties.

I’d go back to the school and see what they suggest. It might be a case of extra interventions for her in house by the school right now x

OP, you sound like an amazing parent and I applaud you for considering whether your dd might need some help - it's so easy to be in denial or bury your head in the sand.

Given the significant parental input that she has obviously had at home, I think you're right to be asking questions. She might just be a late bloomer, or there might be something else going on. I think it would be a good idea to re-open the dialogue with the school about what they think might be going on, and what interventions they might recommend.

On the positive side, it seems that she is great socially and has lots of friends. Whether she turns out to be "academic" or not, good social skills are a wonderful advantage and will get her through life as least as much as being "clever".

But she is so little right now, it's too early to predict whether or not she'll crack the academic stuff at some point. For the time being, just focus on supporting her in the her and now, in collaboration with the school.

Not sure films and chapter books are helpful anyway. Stick with simple picture books to build her vocabulary and understanding. Read everyday with her. Practice phonics with her.
Disney films are dreadful at the best of times, I would recommend things on Cbeebies like numberblocks and alphablocks.

Sometimes kids have what are known as language or auditory processing issues too @Booboobunnywoo. I would ask school for a written assessment and take it to GP and request an urgent referral for further specialist intervention while she is still little.

I don't know if normal or not, but re books, I'd go simple. My kids loved Dr. Suess, really simple and got them involved, the rhyming and repetition seems to help their confidence with the words

This!

Work with the school and support her the best you can. We're in a similar situation, our DS is one of the oldest in his reception class but can hardly write any letters and is completely hit and miss with phonics and sounding out. He's in intervention and we do 'fun' reading and writing practice with him but theres slow progress. It's hard but its early days and they are still young. Keep as open minded as you can and be her cheerleader.

I think the point to be asking more questions is when the inputs are not equating to the outputs. It sounds like you’re doing all the right things to develops skills and abilities and so there may be a barrier to her developing accordingly. It’s unlikely school will test until 7/8. They don’t like to diagnose too early incase it’s developmental. Do you have any learning barriers in your family?

She sounds a bit behind and I would want an educational psychologist to have a look at her, and check for hearing and things. The school should be able to guide you.

It doesn’t mean she won’t be bright, so don’t panic, but do start addressing it

Listen to what her school is telling you. Her teachers have taught hundreds of five-year-olds and they wouldn’t have said anything if they thought your DD was progressing within the parameters they’d expect. Take whatever steps are required to get her assessed. To be honest, I’d be inclined to start with getting her ears and eyes tested and then take it from there.

Don’t think of it in terms of ‘intelligence’. There are many reasons she might struggle with language, sequences, narratives etc but that doesn’t mean she isn’t intelligent. There are many kinds of intelligence, and it’s possible she might just need to be taught in a different way or have some specific support.

FWIW, my friend’s child could barely hold a pen to write at all when he was five and had zero interest in narratives like stories and films. He needed specialist support to get by. He’s now 17 and has just been offered a place to read Physics at Cambridge.

I would really encourage you to talk with school again. You need to be in partnership to best support your DD. Explain that you were defensive when they raised issues before (very common - we all want our children to be perfect) and now you see what they're saying and want to work together to support DC. She may well be delayed - not unusual. The most important thing is getting support as early as possible.

Based on all the things you've said, she does sound like she needs some extra support and that there's ~something going on. I wouldn't like to guess at all. This is mainly going on the expectations of my DS in Reception - before Easter they were learning to write sentences and short stories for example.