Wedding rings and DD/DSD

Also, is OP’s stepdaughter’s mother going to give one of her rings to OP’s daughter? If not, why is OP expected to give one of her rings to her stepdaughter?

Agree with you, There your rings now, do want you want with your possessions… your husband is out of order!

My DH is also like this, I've lost count of the number of times I've had to tell him over 42 years of marriage that anything given as a gift ( especially jewellery) becomes the property of the recipient. I wouldn't dream of telling him to whom he should leave anything I've bought him such as watches etc., they are his to do with as he wishes .
I'm also like the OP I've no intention of going any time soon , so the boot may be on the other foot !

Nothing wrong with that x

I have, but I want them to have something personal from me.

Why don't you put the money in a savings account for them instead?
My DM died 2 years ago, with it all being shared between myself and my step-sister. My step-dad died the year before. No jewellery was specified in the will, as assets like that are generally only written down as a special addendum, unless there was an item of individual particular value. I had all the jewellery. I gave some to my Aunts and some to my Step-Sister but nobody wanted much. I need to sell some but every time I open the case where it all is I can't bear to.

Unless you get something like sovereigns, jewellery doesn't hold it's value.

Her own kids are more important to her than her stepchild, sure.

I imagine she spoke to him about it and he agreed, rather than ‘she told him’ - as if he’s not a grown ass man capable of making his own decision. I also imagine he wants his wedding ring to go to his son, given that it symbolises the marriage of his parents. The DSD isn’t more somehow more worthy of it than his son is.

yup it's totally reasonable for him to earmark something of equal value / significance for DSD but no he doesn't get to say who gets your rings.

The reason why is because OP regards her kids far more implrtant than DSD.

Her attitude stinks towards her. She has told her DH that his DD will get his watch. Knowig she has a son who will more likely wear hisa DF watch, the wedding ring of DF should go to DSD. But this won't happen.

Agree with you op, your rings your decision and I would definitely pass to my DD not DSD. Although I did give my DSD all my jewellery from my Ex-H I didn’t want it, it wasn’t valuable but her and I get on well and I asked if she wanted it and she did. None of it shes be able to wear as the rings in particular were too small but she said it reminds her of me. I’m obviously not with her Dad any more and she never liked any of his other partners. I actually think she took it all just to piss her current stepmother off.

My own DDs will get jewellery from me, with the exception of a watch I’ve said is for my oldest, it belonged to my grandmother who she is named after. They can decide themselves who gets what. I’ve started to buy a new piece every couple of years to make sure they all get a roughly equal share.

I don’t think it would be fair to pass jewellery from you to your dsd because she will inherit from her own mum. Is your dh going to make her share with your daughter? No he isn’t. You daughter would lose part of her inheritance and your dsd would inherit twice.

Ex jewellery shop worker here.
An insurance valuation is no indication of what an item will fetch when sold.
It's always the highest valuation you can get, as in order to get these things replaced they may need to be hand made etc.

If your dsd was to take the ring to a shop to sell, she'd most likely get a price based on the metal price of the day, unless the jeweller was particularly looking to sell a secondhand ring of that type (.50 carat solitaire for example ). She'd get 1/4 of the current retail price of such a ring if she were lucky.
The only way she'd get anywhere near a decent amount for it was if she sold it privately.

All that said, if you have a close relationship with DSD and wanted to make her feel special, you could leave her a ring. If you have no relationship with her then why would you?

My Dad's wife has been weird with me my entire life and I wouldn't want a ring from her.

Some of the replies on this are insane lol

Declaring that the ring will be going to your daughter could be seen to undermine the part your husband's daughter is in your family unit. I think this needs to be discussed sensitively to minimise misunderstandings.

He leaves his rings and watches to his daughter and you to yours. I assume she will inherit off mum and dad and just daughter also you and her dad. That is how it works. Just no.

what’s your will like I wouldn’t be happy I’d want my share to go to my daughter - what happens if you die and have no will - he gets everything and can cut your daughter out.

I swear 90% of MN would fail the y6 reading SATS, what with their lack of reading ability, comprehension, lack of inference skills and making shit up.

They were gifted to you, yours to pass on as you wish.

I thought you were laughing at the idea of him buying her a ring. If not this seems like the best solution so both his daughters get nice rings and one doesn't just get a man's watch.

Agree that is absolutely disgusting

I just assumed it was an expression - “take it to sale” as in “take it to a sale room”. I’d never heard it before, but it’s hardly difficult to work out.

What young lady is likely to wear her dads watch? Seems unfair that she gets an heirloom that gets to sit in a box whilst DD gets to parade around in gems worth a lot more and that she can use.

“Parade around in gems”? 😆😆 It’s her mother’s wedding and engagement rings. She’s hardly Alexis Carrington!

Oh so the whole post is in jest? Or are we supposed to mind read which bits are?