Dd has started running away at bedtime

But also this

Without fail even if my 5 year old is having a complete meltdown if I say...

I'm going to win ...

She will run up the stairs to beat me to bed.

So I would recommend making it a competition to who can get to the bathroom to brush teeth first? Then they choose story or something. I don't think I can ever say when it hasn't worked!

We use this one

Jolik Improved door locks for children(2 Pack) child locks for door & Handles 3M VHB Adhesive - No Drill, No Screw https://amzn.eu/d/73mB0C0

I'd try heading out for a designated run around/bounce on the trampoline half an hour before the normal bedtime routine and see if that helps.

Agree re consequences but immediate ones re no story short bath etc

Age 5 I'd get angry. This is not a fun game.

Every time she runs away, the following night her bedtime is 5 mins earlier?

It's not safe because your young child can open it from the inside. She could just let herself out in the middle of the night if she woke up. It needs a child safe locking system.

Regarding the behaviour, I'd give her the opportunity for time outside before bed and have consequences for not coming in as per the PP. But crucially don't make a big deal of it, just follow through with any consequences without any fuss or shouting.

What time is she going to bed? My five year old gets giddy when he's overtired. So if it's near 7.30 he acts this way!

Clocks change is such a pain, my DD is 10 and still needs convincing that it's actually bedtime when it's light out. She acts like there's a sneaky conspiracy to make her go to bed during daytime lol

You have no way to lock an external door? That's not safe you need to fit at least a high level bolt.

I can’t offer any advice, but I’m in the same boat with having a nightmare with bedtimes recently.

My DD is also 5.5 and since the clocks went forward it’s hard work getting her to bed, she also will only fall asleep with my laying next to her. By the time bedtime is done it’s 9pm and I’m usually tired and ready for bed myself then.

What time are you putting her to bed? Did it start when the clocks changed?

Get a proper lock that is really unsafe.

"You can come in now and we can read before bed. Or if I have to come and get you we won't have time for stories." Shut her in her room "we don't have time for stories because you were messing about"

Then the next day "remember how upset you were when we didn't have time for bedtime stories? Are you going to come have stories or mess about again?"

Why would she stop if it doesn't have consequences?

Why don’t you actively give her that time
outside 15 minute before bedtime and if she doesn’t take it up or come in when you ask then there’s consequences. My DC mess about at bedtime but if it doesn’t stop then I start a count down and I’ll follow through on the consequence

ok controversial but can I suggest the opposite?! lighter evenings maybe better to let her wear herself out with some time in the garden? as they get older it's normal for them to be less tired at bedtime - because bedtime naturally gets later as they get older.

Perhaps your routine could just shift a bit to allow a bit of energy releasing?

Don't understand the suggestion to make bedtime earlier! It's natural as kids get older that they might start not being tired at the same time - especially lighter evenings adding to that sense of energy.

Every time she runs out in the garden, she gets attention - and for kids, even negative attention is good attention.

If you stop her from being able to get outside, you've solved half the problem.

Possibly getting overtired? resulting in giddiness? so could move bedtime routine forward by 30 mins. Otherwise she's just cottoned onto the fact she can wind you up. it's frustrating cos you're so desperate to get them into bed, but you might just wanna make a bit of a joke of it, and throw her over your shoulder, pretend you're a giant or something. Hard at the end of the day I know. Presumably no one else who can take over bedtime so it's not just you every night? Never was for me so I know how hard it is.

You can get something that goes under neath the handle that will stop her from opening it. Loads of similar gadgets on amazon.

Oh the joys! Have a chat earlier in day about a new plan. Explain you’re tired of this behaviour, has she noticed how mummy feels about it etc? Does she like that? My DD of the same age now realises that on nights that she comes in and wakes me for something trivial, that I’m often tired and grumpy the next morning, and less up for playing etc, and she doesn’t like that, so I tie that into discussions about staying in bed unless she’s poorly etc.

In your scenario I’d probably do some immediate consequence thing, like set a timer when I say bedtime is starting, of 30/40min. Give that to her and tell her that’s how long we have to do teeth, jammies, stories etc. If you mess about the time for stories is less or even none. If you go up quickly and get your jobs done fast then we have time for loads of stories and cuddles. Mine also like a bedtime game, tickling, rock paper scissors or who am I, type stuff. This is the first thing to be forfeited if they fuck about.

She's definitely old enough to talk to her about it before bedtime happens. I would explain that it's not nice to runaway from you into the garden like that, and I'd ask her why she does it? If she's just hoping to postpone bedtime then I'd maybe change my bedtime routine so that I warn her 20 minutes beforehand "we're getting ready for bed soon", or give her a choice that's not a choice "do you want to get ready for bed now or in 10 minutes?"

I know it's frustrating, but it's likely a phase (I can't see her running into the garden at 34 when it's bedtime!)