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Original poster

Would you be offended if your Bil picked you up?

318 replies

Stressedjustthinkingaboutit · 11/04/2024 15:12

If you were flying to visit your sister on your own with your kids to another country. Would you be offended if her other half came to pick you up at the airport and drop you at your hotel?
Reason being, it’s at night and your sister is doing bedtime with their dc, would this bother you? Or would you expect your sister to be the one to come?
They will see each other the next morning

OP posts:
TheSnowyOwl · 11/04/2024 15:40

I wouldn’t mind.

Catza · 11/04/2024 15:39

Over the years I have been picked up by my aunt's husband, my mum's boyfriend, my cousin, my cousin's wife, my great uncle, friend of my mum whom I never met before. I am just grateful to be picked up as otherwise it is a bus or an expensive taxi for me. Never once it occurred to me to get offended or to question why a blood relative couldn't be there or what they were doing instead. If it was your sister who kicked up a fuss about your husband picking her up, I would think twice about inviting her in the future.

fieldsofbutterflies · 11/04/2024 15:36

Not at all. My mum and I were often picked up by her BIL when we flew overseas to visit for a whole number of reasons.

What an odd thing to be offended about.

saraclara · 11/04/2024 15:36

It would depend on when I last saw my sister and how far I'd travelled. If I'd not seen her since COVID and had flown to Australia, I'd wonder why on earth her husband couldn't have done bedtime for once so that we could have had that emotional hug at arrivals.

If she lived in France and I'd seen her at Christmas, I'd just be glad of the lift.

Ellie1015 · 11/04/2024 15:35

No not offended at all. If not really late i would expect to see sister when i got back and bedtime done though. If not it would indicate she is really tired/struggling but i would be sympathetic not offended.

Edit - just realised being dropped at hotel so next morning would make sense.

pootlin · 11/04/2024 15:34

In theory this is fine, but my BIL is a creep and I would not want to be in a car alone with him.

I’m polite to him to have continued access to my sister and her children.

Bumblebeeinatree · 11/04/2024 15:33

Apart from bedtime it might be sister doesn't like driving alone at night to an airport car park and wandering around trying to find her sister, depending what country this is, it could be very safe or not so much. And some people are not very confident driving in the dark specially to places they don't usually go. Whatever the reasoning I would just be delighted that anyone was taking me to my hotel.

mitogoshi · 11/04/2024 15:33

Depends on age of children and if she had a drivers licence. If she didn't drive obviously he picks up and if they have any young enough to be still breastfeeding then fair enough but if neither were a factor I'd wonder why he doesn't do bed time! I wouldn't be offended though just bemused as to why bedtime is women's work!

skippy67 · 11/04/2024 15:32

SkaneTos · 11/04/2024 15:16

OP, who are you in this scenario?

Fairly obvious OP is the one doing bedtime with the DC

UltramarineViolet · 11/04/2024 15:32

I can't imagine being offended unless I literally hadn't seen my sister for 10 years or something

BingoMarieHeeler · 11/04/2024 15:31

Yearendjoy · 11/04/2024 15:21

Won't the sisters see each other later that evening though once BIL has picked up? Will the sister still be up by then?

No because as the OP says, BIL is dropping them at a hotel.

Id wonder why sister didn’t do lift and BIL did bedtime tbh. But if I was going to a hotel I wouldn’t expect anyone to pick us up, we’d get a taxi.

Dartmoorcheffy · 11/04/2024 15:30

Is this reverse of some kind. Are you the sister and asking if your sister and her kids will feel insulted if your husband picked them up?

I just can't see any issue at all.

poetryandwine · 11/04/2024 15:29

Fine with me. My DSis dislikes night time driving

MonsteraMama · 11/04/2024 15:29

I love my BIL, he's hilarious, I'd be happy to have a lift from him and not offended at all. Just grateful someone was picking me up!

Aquamarine1029 · 11/04/2024 15:29

Anyone offended by this has form for being a little princess.

Awrite · 11/04/2024 15:28

I have always been very grateful whenever bil has me me/my kids up. I would send DH out at night to do the airport run. He's more than capable of doing bedtime but I don't want to do the airport run, no matter who needs picking up.

betterangels · 11/04/2024 15:28

No. I'd be happy to be picked up and not having to navigate getting to a hotel.

huuskymam · 11/04/2024 15:28

I wouldn't care who picked me up once I didn't have to queue for a bus or taxi. My dh regularly picked up my parents or sister from the airport to drop home.

SoEmbarrassed2024 · 11/04/2024 15:26

Why on earth would someone be bothered? BIL is part of the family and the recipient of the lift should be grateful that someone is coming to get them (particularly during kids bedtime)

Inkblue · 11/04/2024 15:26

My BiL has picked me up many times. I’m always really grateful to be met and get a lift.

FrangipaniBlue · 11/04/2024 15:25

I wouldn't be offended but I probably would wonder why BIL couldn't do bedtime routine and my sister pick me up......

It kind of perpetuates the patriarchy doesn't it, the woman's job is in the home and the man's job is operating the motor vehicle.......

AGodawfulsmallaffair · 11/04/2024 15:23

WalkingThroughTreacle · 11/04/2024 15:15

I wouldn't be if it was me and if I had a sibling that precious I would tell them to get a taxi. Actually, I'd probably not have invited them in the first place.

😂

missnevermind · 11/04/2024 15:23

I would be very grateful to be getting a lift at all.

Geebray · 11/04/2024 15:22

Wouldn't bother me in the slightest. I assume this is a reverse?

HuminaHuminaHumina · 11/04/2024 15:22

Was it your DH that picked your sibling up and they are sulking about it op?

No, I would not be offended.

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