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Should petrol money and accommodation be charged?

291 replies

PinkStarAtNight · 11/04/2024 10:23

I am looking for opinions on whether a person should be charged petrol money and accommodation fees or not.

So the situation is, person A and person B agreed to go on holiday with each other and booked a holiday together last year. They paid half for the holiday itself and, because it involves person A driving them there, they of course agreed they would split the petrol money.

Months later, person C, who is a close family member of person A, is going through a tough time and was invited to tag along on the holiday as they live alone and are struggling.

There is now a debate as to whether person C should pay a third of the petrol money and a third of the accommodation costs.

Accommodation has already been paid in full between person A and B, so paying for accommodation would involve person C handing over cash to person A and B to make it so they have essentially all paid a third each. And petrol money would be split three ways on the days of travel.

So...
Should person C pay an equal share of accommodation and petrol?

Or should they not have to pay, because person A and B planned this trip a while ago and would be paying half regardless of whether person C attends or not.

Person C will not be increasing costs in any way as the accommodation has always been big enough for three people, as person A and B booked a large caravan. Person C has agreed that they will not be dictating what happens on the holiday or factored into any decisions or plans for the activities, as they are only going because they don't want to be alone right now.

Also, does it make a difference that person C is close family member of one of the original people?

OP posts:
OhmygodDont · 11/04/2024 21:27

A is an asshole. C is an asshole for accepting.

B needs to realise they are being taken for a mug.

CelesteCunningham · 11/04/2024 21:27

PinkStarAtNight · 11/04/2024 21:26

Person C lives with person A

Hmm. Why isn't C allowing A to go and have a holiday? Living with C sounds like hard work. Now I'm starting to feel bad for A as well as B.

DoreenonTill8 · 11/04/2024 21:26

OhmygodDont · 11/04/2024 21:24

So one double bed and a pull out sofa.

whoever invited C is an asshole frankly. That’s not a big caravan with space by any stretch.

Yep C will need the double, a will need the sofa as she's the driver, b gets the salad box from the fridge!.

PinkStarAtNight · 11/04/2024 21:26

Kelly51 · 11/04/2024 21:13

it was more that person C was telling person A that they really can't be alone for a week
Sounds like C is a bit manipulative, what's she going to do next week? expect company 24/7?

Person C lives with person A

OP posts:
OhmygodDont · 11/04/2024 21:24

PinkStarAtNight · 11/04/2024 21:24

The caravan is designed for 4 people.

So one double bed and a pull out sofa.

whoever invited C is an asshole frankly. That’s not a big caravan with space by any stretch.

PinkStarAtNight · 11/04/2024 21:24

DoreenonTill8 · 11/04/2024 21:21

Cs going to need the ensuite isn't she...

No en suite. One bathroom.

OP posts:
OhmygodDont · 11/04/2024 21:24

DoreenonTill8 · 11/04/2024 21:21

Cs going to need the ensuite isn't she...

Indeed the master bed with the en-suite white b sleeps on the sofa. By the price a cheapo gas fire only
tho not central heated so I guess that’s a plus 😂

PinkStarAtNight · 11/04/2024 21:24

OhmygodDont · 11/04/2024 21:20

How big is the caravan. One bed. Two bed. Three bed.

The caravan is designed for 4 people.

OP posts:
DoreenonTill8 · 11/04/2024 21:21

PinkStarAtNight · 11/04/2024 21:20

Haven't been discussed

Cs going to need the ensuite isn't she...

CelesteCunningham · 11/04/2024 21:21

PinkStarAtNight · 11/04/2024 21:16

Just want to state that this description isn't an accurate one. The holiday isn't planned as a fun piss up, as said previously none of them drink. Person C will not be crying. They are not in the midst of a complete break down, just does not want to be alone at nights for various complicated reasons. But they will definitely not be crying all the time or talking about their issues.

Tbh I think you're going to need to give more context if you want meaningful advice, because as it stands C sounds more and more like a piss taker and A sounds more and more like an enabler with every post.

Fair enough if you don't want to give it, caution on the internet is never a bad thing, but that is how everyone is coming across.

OhmygodDont · 11/04/2024 21:20

PinkStarAtNight · 11/04/2024 21:20

Haven't been discussed

How big is the caravan. One bed. Two bed. Three bed.

PinkStarAtNight · 11/04/2024 21:20

OhmygodDont · 11/04/2024 21:03

What’s the sleeping arrangements.

Haven't been discussed

OP posts:
DoreenonTill8 · 11/04/2024 21:17

Why can't they be alone? Still sounds a manipulative cf with the demands!

OhmygodDont · 11/04/2024 21:17

So person C is known as a bit of a cheeky tag along….

again the new sleeping arrangements ?

PinkStarAtNight · 11/04/2024 21:16

Catza · 11/04/2024 14:34

Why not?
Bethany was planning a fun weekend piss up with her friend Alice, and then Alice invited Cindy who is going through a rough time and is going to spend the weekend crying into her Prosecco and rehashing her painful breakup with a Ted. Instead of a fun weekend, Bethany is now stuck in a moan-fest-caravan and is not even going to be compensated for the pleasure?

Just want to state that this description isn't an accurate one. The holiday isn't planned as a fun piss up, as said previously none of them drink. Person C will not be crying. They are not in the midst of a complete break down, just does not want to be alone at nights for various complicated reasons. But they will definitely not be crying all the time or talking about their issues.

OP posts:
Kelly51 · 11/04/2024 21:13

it was more that person C was telling person A that they really can't be alone for a week
Sounds like C is a bit manipulative, what's she going to do next week? expect company 24/7?

DoreenonTill8 · 11/04/2024 21:09

Person C wasn't invited exactly...it was more that person C was telling person A that they really can't be alone for a week and person A said 'well you're going to have to come with us then. I'll talk to B'. When B was asked they said 'Yes that's fine. I expected C would be coming along anyway.'
Money wasn't discussed.

C is a demanding CF then. And they and A are rude. Unless you are B, it sounds like B has been guilt tripped into this. Bs response doesn't exactly sound positive, more they knew A and C would do this. I'd be suspicious this was the plan from the start for A and C and for B to subsidise their holiday!

CelesteCunningham · 11/04/2024 21:08

Is a third of £170 a lot of money to A, B and/or C? In the grand scheme of things sixty quid doesn't seem like much for three people who have presumably all known each other a long time. We'd all be falling over ourselves to pay tbh. Does someone have form for being tight? Or is anyone/everyone skint?

If someone has form for being a cheap chancer that would influence my answer.

Still feeling for B who's had her holiday turned into a support trip for C.

OhmygodDont · 11/04/2024 21:03

What’s the sleeping arrangements.

PinkStarAtNight · 11/04/2024 21:02

Shinyandnew1 · 11/04/2024 13:31

You don't invite someone who is having a bad time as though you're looking out for them and say by the way here's the bill.

You also don’t invite them on your holiday and expect a third party to stump up costs for them.

@PinkStarAtNight are you ever coming back to answer people’s questions?

How were they invited?
What are the accompany petrol costs?
How does B feel about it?
Do you think A should pay for C?

I have been working and then making dinner. I will try to answer some questions now:

Person C wasn't invited exactly...it was more that person C was telling person A that they really can't be alone for a week and person A said 'well you're going to have to come with us then. I'll talk to B'. When B was asked they said 'Yes that's fine. I expected C would be coming along anyway.'
Money wasn't discussed.

The cost of petrol will be around £40 for the journey to and from. It is a UK holiday fairly close to home. It is a 4 day holiday with no plans for any trips/driving around once there.

The caravan was £130.

There will not be a 'food shop' - each person is taking a big bag of food from home. Takeaways and alcohol are not part of the plan as no one drinks and two of the three are on a diet.

How does B feel? - B feels that this was inevitable as they have known about the situation with C for a while. B is a close family friend and has spent a lot of time with C.

Do I think C should pay? - I am unsure which is why I'm asking.

I never even said I was one of either A, B or C so I don't know how people are making decisions about which one I am 😂

The second invite sounds very much like they only expect C to pay whatever extra costs she incurs - her flights, a third of the food & drinks, etc. And that's what "tag along" sounds like to me. C's had no inputto the choice of holiday or dates, which she'd have been entitled to as a full paying member of the party.

This is one of the arguments which has been put forward. As far as I'm aware its not the plan for C to be seen as an equal holiday member but very much as a tag along with little say in anything. Althoufg along that, there aren't really any activities planned because it is designed to be a cheap holiday.

OP posts:
StormingNorman · 11/04/2024 19:36

Person B shouldn’t be expected to foot the bill for Person A’s family member. Does B even want them there?

If A wants to gift C a holiday, they can. A or C should offer to reimburse B so that B is only paying 1/3 of the costs.

Or if B is feeling generous, C could offer to pay for the petrol in full or take everyone for dinner.

Wyksi · 11/04/2024 19:13

Of course person c has to pay their fair share

does person b mind person c going!

I wouldn’t be impressed that my holiday had been changed without my permission

SunshineAndFizz · 11/04/2024 17:45

Yes, no question. Person C should pay a third.

Georgethecat1 · 11/04/2024 17:41

Person C should pay only
caveat is if they have to take a blow up bed or sofa bed when others are in proper beds then I think they should pay but maybe not equal amounts.

FlamingoQueen · 11/04/2024 16:34

I would say that petrol costs should be split, but I think it would be nice to not make them pay for accommodation. A good deed and all that! Might C pay for a meal whilst you are away as a thank you?