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Should petrol money and accommodation be charged?

291 replies

PinkStarAtNight · 11/04/2024 10:23

I am looking for opinions on whether a person should be charged petrol money and accommodation fees or not.

So the situation is, person A and person B agreed to go on holiday with each other and booked a holiday together last year. They paid half for the holiday itself and, because it involves person A driving them there, they of course agreed they would split the petrol money.

Months later, person C, who is a close family member of person A, is going through a tough time and was invited to tag along on the holiday as they live alone and are struggling.

There is now a debate as to whether person C should pay a third of the petrol money and a third of the accommodation costs.

Accommodation has already been paid in full between person A and B, so paying for accommodation would involve person C handing over cash to person A and B to make it so they have essentially all paid a third each. And petrol money would be split three ways on the days of travel.

So...
Should person C pay an equal share of accommodation and petrol?

Or should they not have to pay, because person A and B planned this trip a while ago and would be paying half regardless of whether person C attends or not.

Person C will not be increasing costs in any way as the accommodation has always been big enough for three people, as person A and B booked a large caravan. Person C has agreed that they will not be dictating what happens on the holiday or factored into any decisions or plans for the activities, as they are only going because they don't want to be alone right now.

Also, does it make a difference that person C is close family member of one of the original people?

OP posts:
MsGrumpytrousers · 11/04/2024 22:17

I think Person C is the only one who thinks C shouldn't pay, and it's all going to be horribly awkward and both A and B will wish they hadn't invited her.

Btw.... "Person C has agreed that they will not be dictating what happens on the holiday or factored into any decisions or plans for the activities" is simply not feasible. I would call that emotional blackmail, and I'd run a mile if I ever saw C coming again.

Cough up, C, and ditch all this bollocks about how you don't have to pay because you won't be making the decisions. What are you, 12?

BarbarasRhabarberBar · 11/04/2024 22:10

I wouldn't pay a tenner to have someone make a bed for, assuming full mobility. What a waste.

The holiday sounds cheap enough that it doesn't matter but as b if she wants c to pay. Then ask c what she wants to pay/do financially

C should pay in my opinion.

Notsuretoputit · 11/04/2024 22:03

The costs are thirded and A and C pay £15 each for the bedding.

I think you’re getting a hard time. Perfectly reasonable to suggest inviting C.

CelesteCunningham · 11/04/2024 22:02

PinkStarAtNight · 11/04/2024 21:57

No. Not all. Just person B. Person B likes to save money wherever possible.

If A and C know that about B then it can't be a surprise that B wants C to pay a third of the costs of the holiday.

bellezarara · 11/04/2024 22:01

PinkStarAtNight · 11/04/2024 21:53

Agreed. And B was offered the double bed. However, recently another problem has now arisen over bedding...

There was an option to pay an extra £40 to have all the beds made up on arrival. £40 per caravan not per person. Caravan is made for 4 people so all costs are based on this. £10 per person so £40.

Person A wanted to pay the £40 to get the bedding but person B didn't as didn't see point of extra cost, especially because there wouldn't be 4 people actually going so felt that £40 was too much. So, person A called the holiday company to explain that although the holiday is designed for 4 people, there was only three going so would it be an option to just pay £30 for three people? They said yes, but if there is only three people they won't make up the double bed.

Person A couldn't then backtrack and ask them to make up the double bed because they had already told them there would only be three people and the holiday company said this is how it works...person A is annoyed with person B because person A would have been happy just to split the £40 but person B was quibbling over this and now the double bed will not be made up. So all three of person A B and C are paying £10 each for bedding but if person B is to have the double, they would have to take their own bedding.

Person A couldn't then backtrack and ask them to make up the double bed because they had already told them there would only be three people and the holiday company said this is how it works...

Surely Person A just needs to tell the holiday company that the party size is now 3 and you will pay an extra tenner, please could they make up the double bed?

Why do you feel that’s backtracking?

thecanadianloon · 11/04/2024 22:01

Well person C should have offered to pay the £40, and then they would have been square for the accommodation.
Person C should make a contribution to the travel, because even if they are teeny tiny the extra weight will cost more on fuel and wear and tear on the car.

DoreenonTill8 · 11/04/2024 21:59

So what beds have been made up?

Kelly51 · 11/04/2024 21:58

I think the relationship between them and ages are relevant here.

PinkStarAtNight · 11/04/2024 21:57

CelesteCunningham · 11/04/2024 21:55

Now you're all quibbling over £13 each?

No. Not all. Just person B. Person B likes to save money wherever possible.

OP posts:
CelesteCunningham · 11/04/2024 21:55

Now you're all quibbling over £13 each?

PinkStarAtNight · 11/04/2024 21:53

bellezarara · 11/04/2024 21:37

B should get the best bed and should not have to share with A or C.

Edited

Agreed. And B was offered the double bed. However, recently another problem has now arisen over bedding...

There was an option to pay an extra £40 to have all the beds made up on arrival. £40 per caravan not per person. Caravan is made for 4 people so all costs are based on this. £10 per person so £40.

Person A wanted to pay the £40 to get the bedding but person B didn't as didn't see point of extra cost, especially because there wouldn't be 4 people actually going so felt that £40 was too much. So, person A called the holiday company to explain that although the holiday is designed for 4 people, there was only three going so would it be an option to just pay £30 for three people? They said yes, but if there is only three people they won't make up the double bed.

Person A couldn't then backtrack and ask them to make up the double bed because they had already told them there would only be three people and the holiday company said this is how it works...person A is annoyed with person B because person A would have been happy just to split the £40 but person B was quibbling over this and now the double bed will not be made up. So all three of person A B and C are paying £10 each for bedding but if person B is to have the double, they would have to take their own bedding.

OP posts:
Isthisit22 · 11/04/2024 21:50

Who is C? It makes a big difference eg daughter, husband, mother, etc.
I feel sorry for B. What option but to accept the extra person do they really have?
Please make sure B at least gets the best room.

Starlightstarbright3 · 11/04/2024 21:48

B should not have to share a bathroom . A caravan for 4 with one bathroom is more inconvenient for B .

If I was B I wouldn’t pay the share of c’s holiday - they aren’t even friends .

yes it does sound like C has hinted she wants to go , maybe B felt obligated to say yes .

OhmygodDont · 11/04/2024 21:39

Yes C was basically saying I need to come or you cannot go to A.

CelesteCunningham · 11/04/2024 21:39

PinkStarAtNight · 11/04/2024 21:32

Gosh, I always feel shocked when people say things like this. You must have known some horrible people in your life if your first thought really is that person A and C planned this all along to get a subsidised holiday! Goodness me...

And to the person who mentioned person C's 'demands' - what demands exactly? No demands have been made. Person C just said that they don't feel they can be alone in a house during the night. Person A is usually there. Person A decided to ask person B if C could come along. B said yes. That's it. What demands have been made?

It's emotionally manipulative though. Telling your live-in spouse/sibling/parent that you can't bare to be alone overnight when they have a holiday planned means they only have three choices:

  1. Cancel
  2. Invite you along
  3. Go anyway without you in the knowledge that your can't simply bare to be alone

So B was demanding, just without saying "you must welcome me on your holiday". They've acted badly, and so has A by going along with it.

B really shouldn't be paying more than a third, but if I were B I reckon I'd be leaving A and C to it.

QualityDog · 11/04/2024 21:37

And to the person who mentioned person C's 'demands' - what demands exactly? No demands have been made. Person C just said that they don't feel they can be alone in a house during the night. Person A is usually there. Person A decided to ask person B if C could come along. B said yes. That's it. What demands have been made?

It's quite manipulative to say to another adult that they can't be without you for a week.

bellezarara · 11/04/2024 21:37

PinkStarAtNight · 11/04/2024 21:34

You must have very bad friends if you are assuming this scenario :(

B should get the best bed and should not have to share with A or C.

DoreenonTill8 · 11/04/2024 21:36

Not at all. Just know from mn the amount of cf out there!

PinkStarAtNight · 11/04/2024 21:34

DoreenonTill8 · 11/04/2024 21:26

Yep C will need the double, a will need the sofa as she's the driver, b gets the salad box from the fridge!.

You must have very bad friends if you are assuming this scenario :(

OP posts:
DoreenonTill8 · 11/04/2024 21:34

So are you A or C @PinkStarAtNight ?

OhmygodDont · 11/04/2024 21:33

What else could B say though.

if B said no sorry you’d of just said oh ok then would you?

User56785 · 11/04/2024 21:33

This sounds more and more like a disaster.

Two people were supposed to be going away together and now one of them has invited their partner or their child because they are having a hard time' but not so much that they will want to talk about it. And the one who invited them thinks that having this family member there will make no difference at all and that they shouldn't have to pay anything.

I feel sorry for the friend.

PinkStarAtNight · 11/04/2024 21:32

DoreenonTill8 · 11/04/2024 21:09

Person C wasn't invited exactly...it was more that person C was telling person A that they really can't be alone for a week and person A said 'well you're going to have to come with us then. I'll talk to B'. When B was asked they said 'Yes that's fine. I expected C would be coming along anyway.'
Money wasn't discussed.

C is a demanding CF then. And they and A are rude. Unless you are B, it sounds like B has been guilt tripped into this. Bs response doesn't exactly sound positive, more they knew A and C would do this. I'd be suspicious this was the plan from the start for A and C and for B to subsidise their holiday!

Gosh, I always feel shocked when people say things like this. You must have known some horrible people in your life if your first thought really is that person A and C planned this all along to get a subsidised holiday! Goodness me...

And to the person who mentioned person C's 'demands' - what demands exactly? No demands have been made. Person C just said that they don't feel they can be alone in a house during the night. Person A is usually there. Person A decided to ask person B if C could come along. B said yes. That's it. What demands have been made?

OP posts:
Ddff · 11/04/2024 21:29

In light of your recent updates OP I’d say person B should get the bedroom and person A & C share the sofa bed. She may happy then for C to come along for free

DoreenonTill8 · 11/04/2024 21:27

PinkStarAtNight · 11/04/2024 21:26

Person C lives with person A

B needs to run. So is the faaamily of a and c married?

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