To leave my son alone in the car?

We usually leave DS, who is 7, in the car park when we go shopping. He watches something on the phone and isn't fussed at all. He dislikes shopping and would just run around the shop trying to play tag with DH otherwise.
I lock the car but it has a feature where it can be opened from the inside even if it's locked, so he could get out and walk to the shop, if he wanted to. (In theory, he'd be old enough for me to send him to the shop by himself at this age.)
We live abroad, though, and shop at our rather small Aldi in our rather small town most of the time. I'm aware that British parents seem to be a bit weird with these things. 10 is plenty old enough to be left for a few minutes.

Some poor woman sat in her car in the rain contemplating the shit day ahead of her and she has a bitchy resting face as she's glanced over at you and you've taken it to heart.

You have a problem if you think random people have it in for you.

You did nothing wrong, at my kids school people do this with sleeping toddlers

You mention having anxiety, and I think it’s obvious that most commenters think that leaving a 10 year old in a car for three minutes, is absolutely fine. But it really does sound as of you need to let go the apron strings a little bit. A ten year old should have been absolutely fine in the house, on his own, while you were taking your other child to school. Even more so if he wasn’t feeling well. Most kids would prefer to be left in bed, than dragged out in the rain. As you say, he’s going to comp/ high school, in a little over a year and he needs to be a bit more self sufficient by then. I think you need to start working on both your own and his confidence a bit, to allow him to start doing things independently now.

I'd imagine the dirty look was more about you parking on the pavement in the makeshift car park and nothing at all to do with a 10 year old sat in a car.

I’d have left him at him to be honest if it was just school run and he’d stopped puking. Definitely left my 10 year olds in car before when nipping to shops and they don’t want to trail round. Suspect she was more judging about why he wasn’t in school??

I would have left him at home. YOu do need to toughen up a bit. It shard, I know. But we all have to deal with a shedload of judgement as it is without adding additional jdugement that's just in ou rheads.

He’s 10. He’s fine to stay in the car. I would have even left him at home at 10

Another one who thinks that it would have been fine to leave him at home.
I think you need to introduce responsibility and freedom gradually.
Big leaps are more risky than small steps. Try to use this sort of opportunity to motivate yourself if you find it difficult. Need to drop sibling somewhere, leave him at home, pop to the chemists, again at home. At this age start small 15/20 mins, then 30 mins etc.

Was he sitting with a sick bucket or something? Maybe she was more concerned that disapproving. You absolutely did the right thing.

I sure that the woman was not judging you in any way.

Indeed! Not sure why she's being called names at all she probably didn't even notice the 10 year old sitting in the car and if she did she gave them no more than a passing glance. Poor women literally did nothing.

That’s a bit extreme. Why the ‘old’? Also we don’t know she was doing anything.

The person could have been having a bad day, been cursing the rain. Thinking about something else. Anything at all.

The OP made a judgment based on her anxiety.

Absolutely fine! I wouldn’t think twice about it!

I regularly pop into shops etc and leave my 10 year old in the car ! If he doesn’t want to come in I’m not going to force him.

I would be more hesitant if it was not a nice area , it was night time or I wasn’t parked that close to where I was going etc .

In this situation too - he’s poorly and it’s raining , it was the best option !

Don’t worry about it , chances are you are just overthinking it and the woman wasn’t judging you at all and if she was , well it’s ridiculous and quite frankly , none of her business !

You have done absolutely nothing wrong ❤️

You will always get judgement from others and shockingly other mums are the absolute worst. If you weren’t being judged for leaving him in the car you would’ve been judged for dragging a sick kid out in the rain or judged for taking him into school grounds and “risking” other kids.

At 10 he is absolutely fine to be left in the car for short periods of time. If I was running into a shop for a couple of things or nipping into the chemist etc I would ask my oldest if they wanted to come or stay in the car and 9/10 times they’d stay in the car and I’d take my youngest with me (much to their dismay).

At 10 I left my DS alone in the car several times. He was even spending time at home alone at that age.

It’s absolutely fine. I had the same situation recently and I left my 10 year old home alone while I walked my other daughter to school as I was away less than 30mins. She didn’t even leave her bed.

Ah don't dwell on it. She's a nobody, isn't part of your life so just put it out of your head and move on.

Not an issue. Ignore the old busybody!

Yes, absolutely. Poor boy probably would have been happier left in bed.

Absolutely fine I don’t see the problem personally I would rather you keep him in the car and not risk potentially spreading the bug I mean that in the nicest possible way OP let people give you dirty looks nothing to do with them he’s old enough to be left alone in a secure place it’s not like you left the doors open and the engine running, honestly some people are so perfect it’s hard to fit in 😂 hope your son is feeling much better xx

I remember my mum doing an entire food shop leaving me and my brother with our gameboys in the car park (from about 7 and 10 years old). That was 20 years ago I guess but I wouldn't think twice about it now either.

Absolutely fine, you were doing the best you could under the circumstances.

He’s 10 not 2 - pretty sure it was ok to leave him for a few minutes! He’ll be walking himself to school in a year’s time at secondary!! Ignore judgemental people - their opinion doesn’t matter to you! Hope he’s better soon :-)

He's 10, leave the poor kid at home in the warm fgs.