Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be irritated by Asda card woman?

236 replies

ExitSandyman · 10/04/2024 20:57

At our local Asda there is a woman who hangs around the cards - she’s ALWAYS there. She doesn’t seem to do much other than tidy up the shelves and bother customers. She wears a badge that’s says volunteer.

Anyway whenever you go down the cards aisle she will come over and ask if you need any help. No matter what your answer is, she will ask who you’re buying for and start pulling out cards that you might like.

I personally like to shop in peace. If I’m buying a card, I know the person I’m buying for and I know what kind of thing they’ll like.?having this woman pushing various cards into me is a distraction and an annoyance. Has anyone ever heard of these volunteers at Asda? Is it some kind of scheme? She’s been there well over a year. My heart sinks everytime I need a card and I see her stood there as she just won’t leave people alone.

and yeah I know people will say shop for cards elsewhere but I shouldn’t have to!

OP posts:
Ladyluckinred · 10/04/2024 23:45

OP, do you shop there for cards often? I usually get all mine in one go for upcoming birthdays over the next few months. I imagine this isn’t a weekly thing?

I agree with a previous suggestion, could you ask her to get the 5 for £1, whilst you choose the one you want? I had a security guard in Morrisons speak to me for about 5 minutes the other day about the new baskets. He had SEN and actually I could tell he really enjoyed sharing his knowledge. He was nice and cheery, I thought he was lovely.

I like to shop in peace too but if you alter your perspective, it probably won’t annoy you anymore.

Screamingabdabz · 10/04/2024 23:43

Damnyourheadshoulderskneesandtoes · 10/04/2024 23:16

I am sorry that your communication skills are so poor that you don't know how to make conversation with this woman OP. Keep trying and maybe one day you'll be able to talk to all kinds of people, even people different to you.

Shame your empathy skills only work intermittently too.

ilovesooty · 10/04/2024 23:42

Perhaps you could get a very large badge saying "don't talk to me. I'm busy".

ExitSandyman · 10/04/2024 23:41

Damnyourheadshoulderskneesandtoes · 10/04/2024 23:16

I am sorry that your communication skills are so poor that you don't know how to make conversation with this woman OP. Keep trying and maybe one day you'll be able to talk to all kinds of people, even people different to you.

I don’t go to shop to chat, I’m busy and need to be in and out.

OP posts:
ilovesooty · 10/04/2024 23:39

It's hardly "saintly" to respond kindly.

It's sad in my view that it seems so hard for some people to exercise a bit of understanding.

Miloandfreddy · 10/04/2024 23:34

How many cards are you buying and how frequently that this bothers you so much?

DoreenonTill8 · 10/04/2024 23:27

Sconeswithnutella · 10/04/2024 21:58

Maybe try a polite “thanks so much for your help but I prefer to find one myself”. It’s really not something to get worked up over.

But that must take 30 seconds at most
The trauma.
I didn't know asda did this scheme and I think slightly better of them for it.

StellaGibson2022 · 10/04/2024 23:24

Aw OP cant you ask her to choose you the 5 cards for a £1 (or similar offer)?

She just wants to be helpful and it isn’t intentional that she irritates you.

Im not sure if I might take it too far but I would probably ask if they do cards for neighbours with new dogs, specific happy birthday cards for bosses etc etc

Damnyourheadshoulderskneesandtoes · 10/04/2024 23:16

I am sorry that your communication skills are so poor that you don't know how to make conversation with this woman OP. Keep trying and maybe one day you'll be able to talk to all kinds of people, even people different to you.

Clafoutie · 10/04/2024 23:13

Princesspollyyy · 10/04/2024 21:46

She shouldn't have to shop elsewhere

Well, if the volunteer does have a learning disability as many are suggesting then that’s not really fair either. She ‘shouldn’t have to’ have a learning disability. The levels of perceived injustice are really skewed.

Screamingabdabz · 10/04/2024 23:11

Glad there are so mainly saintly people who are willing to be kind and patient and spend all day chatting and being endlessly charitable. Me? I’ve got my own bucket of shit going on, I’ve got a big shop to do and I’m so time poor I could cry - I just want to choose the card in the most efficient way I can and get the hell out.

Call me horrible but I’m with you op.

KreedKafer · 10/04/2024 23:04

the80sweregreat · 10/04/2024 20:58

She sounds nuts ! Why voluntarily volunteer to work in Asda ? No offence to the lady , but this sounds a bit bizarre !

The words “no offence” are doing some fucking heavy lifting here

Clafoutie · 10/04/2024 23:01

Sorry OP, I can see it is irritating, but I think you have got it out of proportion and it is not very kind to complain about this person on here.

TokyoSushi · 10/04/2024 22:31

OP, just give her 30 seconds or do your card shopping at a different time/somewhere else. She clearly has a reason to be there and a bit of kindness goes a long way.

RollOnSpringDays · 10/04/2024 22:26

How low can you go ? NIMBYism in a different guise. It is quite clear reading your post that the lady is there for a reason - and I would imagine it gives her real joy. But go on, complain that you don’t like her attitude and get her moved away - and pat yourself firmly on the back afterwards.

CammyChameleon · 10/04/2024 22:22

It's fine to be irritated by little "personality clashes" like this, or to find someone's voice or mannerisms annoying. You just recognise that some things rub you the wrong way without it meaning the other person is "bad", and let it go.

the80sweregreat · 10/04/2024 22:22

Ahh, sorry , apologies
Yes, she might be doing some work experience in there.
I haven't seen any volunteers in supermarkets before. In charity shops , but not in Asda.

CrazyforShoes · 10/04/2024 22:21

Galliano · 10/04/2024 22:07

I'm as antisocial as they come and hate supermarket shopping but I hope my empathy and compassion never hits such a low that I would object to this or respond with anything other than tolerance and respect.

Absolutely this.
This thread has really saddened me. The "I shouldn't have to/why should I" brigade is what is wrong with society.

MeMyCatsAndMyBooks · 10/04/2024 22:21

Just say "thank you for your help, but it's okay I can pick a card today myself."

She's clearly SEN. Be kind. It doesn't take much.

Crapuscular · 10/04/2024 22:16

If it really bothers you, shop elsewhere.
Supermarket volunteers are there for an incredibly good reason.

My local supermarket has sessions where staff and pupils from the local SEN school come to learn social skills, buying skills , self care skills etc...

Just embrace it or say a pleasant 'thanks but no thanks.'

Galliano · 10/04/2024 22:07

I'm as antisocial as they come and hate supermarket shopping but I hope my empathy and compassion never hits such a low that I would object to this or respond with anything other than tolerance and respect.

MrsClatterbuck · 10/04/2024 21:58

JanglingJack · 10/04/2024 21:52

I'm sure the voluntary worker understands no thank you as well.

It does say in the op she doesn't leave people alone so maybe it isn't that simple.

Sconeswithnutella · 10/04/2024 21:58

Maybe try a polite “thanks so much for your help but I prefer to find one myself”. It’s really not something to get worked up over.

JanglingJack · 10/04/2024 21:52

Princesspollyyy · 10/04/2024 21:46

She shouldn't have to shop elsewhere

I'm sure the voluntary worker understands no thank you as well.

JanglingJack · 10/04/2024 21:51

I Love Asda for employing people with learning disabilities.

I know the guy there now, who keeps the trollies dry, clean and in order misses his Covid job of offering masks and hand cleanser - and having a little chat about the football.

I feel uplifted coming out if I have a nice chat and there's no hidden agenda. Or if it's not for you, a simple no thank you suffices.

Swipe left for the next trending thread