To be irritated by Asda card woman?

@CruCru good idea! Go elsewhere, problem solved.

I wonder if OP has thought of that 🤔

So, when the OP says “No thank you, I don’t need any help” the volunteer tries harder to please her by ignoring her and carrying on waving cards under her nose? I think that’s a bit of a stretch. The way the OP worded it makes me think that the volunteer isn’t trying harder or less hard to please - she wants to find people cards and doesn’t listen when they don’t want her help.

I don’t expect the OP to come back but, in her position, I’d shop in a different supermarket altogether so I can buy cards if I need to.

Who knows? Maybe the volunteer when she's shoes her irritation, try's even harder to please her?

The question is, how does she show her irritation? She can’t be particularly rude or the card woman would leave her alone. If she shows her irritation by saying “No thank you, I don’t need any help” a few times then leaving without buying anything, I wouldn’t consider that rude or unkind.

Whether OP did or not, some people WILL show irritation if they're not left alone when they've asked to be. Which is why the shop is failing this volunteer.

If you take on people with some kind of learning or social need, they need to be supported in a way that helps them, rather than which puts them in a position where costumers get frustrated with them.

@CruCru she's said she's irritated and I suspect she shows that irritation!

I’m wondering if I am reading a different thread to everyone else. At no point has the OP ever said that she is not polite to the volunteer. I suspect that she is polite - which is why the volunteer ignores her when she says she doesn’t need any help.

Use the internet then.

Your whole post reeks of ableism and tbh I think you should take a long look in the mirror. It takes, what, 2 mins to be kind to someone and treat them with basic respect and dignity.

How many cards do you have to buy that you would be there regularly or long enough for it to really be an issue? No wonder you’re so time poor if you need to be in the card aisles all the time!

Did you bother to read the OP's post at all? Or any of the others pointing out that OP has said 'No thanks', to no avail? No, because you and others like you just want to come onto the thread to swipe at the OP whilst posting something irrelevant and condescending to make.a.point.

Along with OffToBedfordshire who tells her delightful colleague the same thing 10 times as if that is some sort of industry gold standard. It's patronising and reductive. People with SEN who are in the workplace need to be supported and guided into the roles they're placed in, with feedback and mentoring so that they are doing what's needed and not just paid lip-service to.

It's difficult to believe that some posters have any actual experience, never mind professionally.

Someone should run through them with OP too.

Agreed, just be polite.

I'd also be concerned that if this volunteer can't/won't accept "No" and continues to try and help that they themselves might feel hurt or offended or like they did something wrong if someone blatantly ignores them after the initial "No thank you" and tries to pick their own card

It's not Safeguarding them at all

Someone needs to run through some appropriate responses and reactions with the volunteer- for her own sake. Just as they should with any member of staff.

Exactly

That. The volunteer is not being supported by the shop if she's not being monitored and trained in how and when to help.

I've spent a 40 years career teaching autistic and learning disabled people, and even I would be irritated by this volunteer repeatedly not taking no for an answer.

In an ideal world it would be possible for a customer to mention this and ask if the volunteer could be helped to interact more effectively. But as this thread demonstrates, it might not be taken well.

This

It's not hard is it.

YANBU OP. The issue here is that the volunteer doesn't seem to have had any guidance, support or mentoring- which would include learning what to do if someone says no. This will only change if it's fed back to ASDA. Before someone bites the head off the obviously well meaning volunteer or worse. Not everyone has the time or inclination to chat longer than necessary in a shop. As long as they're polite in their dealings with staff, no one should have to apologise for this.

I've worked in retail and new staff - particularly anyone on their first job or just lacking a bit of confidence, would often spend a bit of time watching us and sort of learning what to do and say to help them get in the swing of it. We'd have quarterly staff meetings and they'd usually include some customer service discussion and skills chat / training. This was two fold; Shops need sales to survive so we had to get it right and the staff needed to feel resilient and empowered to deal with whoever came in. Including people- no doubt some of whom have posted on this thread lambasting OP- who had no problem tearing chunks out of shy, new to the work force 17 year olds who were still learning. And I worked in quite a "naice" shop for a very mumsnetty brand when people did this to my staff. Someone needs to run through some appropriate responses and reactions with the volunteer- for her own sake. Just as they should with any member of staff.

I'd use the example @melj1213 suggested, praising the work the volunteer does and her positive presence but highlighting your concern. If it were my store, I'd want to know. I couldn't fix it otherwise. If ASDA aren't able to accommodate this / don't have this in place as part of their practice around this scheme then they need to take a look at the scheme and perhaps make changes and improvements. It sounds like a lot of people get some great opportunities and get a lot out of it so hopefully they're properly supported in doing so.

@melj1213 this was sadly the sort of thing I was thinking about with how volatile situations with customers can be in my first post on this thread. Hence why I’d also suggested OP gives feedback to the store because I also don’t feel this volunteer is being appropriately supported.

I’m sorry to read you’’ve been smacked across the face at work and I hope the police were called and those customers were banned. Years back I had a customer throw a cup of coffee at me. Thankfully it missed because that could have been painful. Customer on that occasion was just a plain horrible individual and completely reckless,

In my earlier post I’d mentioned about customers playing tricks on this volunteer in the card aisle. That’s still not nice but probably lower end of the scale compared to a customer losing their wrag with the volunteer, which based on our experiences is sadly a likely possibility. Something that could be avoided if this volunteer is coached/given feedback/supervised.

Well you’re not an arsehole and I’m afraid people who think negatively of you have had a very lucky existence of clearly not working for an employer where they are very strict about timekeeping. What you’ve posted here was exactly what I was thinking. Sadly it wouldn’t hold up in a disciplinary meeting and equally sadly there are employers out there that would hold being a minute or two late back from lunch against an employee.

I agree with that, Hospitality, I think that most people are very much in favour of people with SEN being helped and assisted into the workplace. I wonder if sometimes it is a fear of doing/saying the wrong thing, causing upset that is a barrier to making contact? I mean, it's bog standard to respond to a statement about how awful the weather is, we generally know how to answer and the limitations of what's expected.

Supermarkets are a hotbed of stress really, busy, noisy, full of other customers and for most it's not a social arena. A thread was posted a little while ago about elderly and/or lonely customers wanting to chat at checkout. Understandably, many people want to zip in and out, they don't want to be held up. Posters were being called intolerant for not wanting to indulge chat - either directly or indirectly - but again, you have no idea a) what's going on in the time-pressed person's life and b) how long the chat is going to take and will it be possible to get away. Those are definite factors.

From my own experience of working with people with SEN it's not quite so easy to navigate every situation and where time is at a premium I can absolutely understand that shoppers want to get it and get out of the shop. It's the wrong format really. The best project I worked with was a group in a botanical gardens. It's not a high pressure environment, people don't call in when they're in a rush and it's just a different atmosphere, perfect in fact.

I think not enough has or is being done to understand barriers - not from anybody's point of view - and until that work is carried out, there will be an uneasy alliance and an 'underground' group of people who don't want to be involved.

I totally agree, they do have a duty to train and support the volunteer(s) that may struggle with interactions like this to protect them and the scheme itself.

I just think the emphasis should be on the protection and support of what is likely to be a vulnerable person, rather than a customer not having to see the bigger picture and have a little bit of tolerance and understanding for people who need that bit of extra support in learning boundaries and social cues. People will likely say that it's 'Not the customers job or problem' but we're all people whether customers, staff or volunteers and isn't it just a human thing to do?

The effect will still hopefully be the same but the approach could be so different.

The OP has already said that doesn’t work.

I don't disagree with your post but Asda has a duty to train this volunteer, to put in place the methods that will help. Those have already been mentioned - mentoring/shadowing experienced staff. That is a great resource and it would show any new employee how it's done. Nobody walks into a job knowing everything about it.

If that step has been missed then a really good scheme is placed in jeopardy. It is the responsibility of the employer to carry out risk assessments for all roles and where an employee or volunteer has SEN, it places even more importance on making sure that the person is comfortable and secure in that role.

It's not the customers who don't enjoy/appreciate the interaction who should be the concern, it's the customers who are not tolerant and who may become abusive.

Oh now you're trampling on the feelings of the sanctimonious posters who get their kicks from talking to volunteers and berating anyone else who doesn't want to spend their shopping time patting shop staff on their heads. Perhaps the think they're doing their 'royal duty' or something? It's nauseating.

It all went quiet when talk of training and support was mentioned because that's not what the majority of posters on this thread want, they want an object of pity and they want one to vilify and froth at.

Treating people with respect doesn't mean patronising them. Giving somebody the tools to do their job well so that they can feel good about themselves is priceless; meaningless platitudes are not.