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AIBU?

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Would you have turned her away?

120 replies

Greatbritish · 10/04/2024 20:43

Friend and I were discussing an event that happened back in 1994, when we were 15 yrs old.

We were on a minibus full of teenagers coming home from a youth group week away. The journey home was 5 hours. Friend had vocalised for 30 mins that she needed the loo, and I could tell she was close to having an accident. There were no toilets we could see on the route and the youth leader driving didn't want to hunt around for loos. He just wanted to get us all home.

I persuaded the driver to pull into a residential road, as I was going to knock doors until someone let my friend use their loo. The first person I asked let us in straight away after I explained the situation. It was a man with young children. He happily let her pee in his downstairs loo, then we went back on the bus. I didn't even get his address to write a thank you card after the event.

Would you have let her in to use the loo?

YABU: I wouldn't let a teenage stranger in my house.

YANBU: If you gotta go, you gotta go. In you come teenager.

OP posts:
HollyKnight · 10/04/2024 21:32

If I had a downstairs toilet near the front door (and DH was home), maybe. If not, no, I wouldn't let a random stranger walk through my house where my children are.

Greatbritish · 10/04/2024 21:30

CammyChameleon · 10/04/2024 21:23

These days I imagine that whoever was in charge of the 15 year olds wouldn't be keen on letting them go into a stranger's house!

I suppose I'd let a teen girl or younger child, but not a teen boy without DH home.

These days there's Google. We'd have likely located a nearby supermarket just off the main roads we were on.

OP posts:
LeaveTheClocksAlone · 10/04/2024 21:28

In 1994 yes. In this day and age probably not.

Delatron · 10/04/2024 21:28

Sorry just seen your update. But if she was disabled then this was all down to the Youth Leader and her parents should have put in a complaint. It must have been very stressful for her.

Delatron · 10/04/2024 21:26

I wouldn’t as I’d be worried it was a scam.

She should have just gone behind a tree/bush.

No need for a thank you card. You were lucky you knocked on a chilled person’s door.

CammyChameleon · 10/04/2024 21:23

These days I imagine that whoever was in charge of the 15 year olds wouldn't be keen on letting them go into a stranger's house!

I suppose I'd let a teen girl or younger child, but not a teen boy without DH home.

TheNurdnugget · 10/04/2024 21:20

Times are much different now, I think we are a little more cautious.

It wasn't much later than that when we as a youth group got lost on a walk. We flagged down a bloke on the side of the road and he gave us a ride back in his Land Rover. We were in the arse end of nowhere with one female adult to 4 kids, he could have been anyone.

Yozzer87 · 10/04/2024 21:16

No. I'd be inclined to think it was some sort of scam.

BettyShagter · 10/04/2024 21:15

Greatbritish · 10/04/2024 21:05

Because I was grateful he helped?

Because it's nice to be nice?

That's what you've picked up on from my post? 🤦

Yes, that and the fact it's all about piss.

But surely the nice thing to do would be for the person who used his toilet, to note the address and send the card?

Notamum12345577 · 10/04/2024 21:15

Yes I would

PassingStranger · 10/04/2024 21:13

kellion · 10/04/2024 20:52

No, I wouldn't have even answered the door.

If I desperately needed to wee I wouldn't have knocked on a stranger's door, I would have just weed behind a bush. I would have been a bit unimpressed with friend for needing the loo during a 5 hour journey anyway, I've been on 9 hour flights and not needed the loo.

You must drink nothing then and that's bad for you.
Don't believe that nobody needs the loo in 9 hours away.
Also you should walk around the plane and exercise anyway.
The girl on the school trip should never have been treated like that. You should have toilet stops.

betterangels · 10/04/2024 21:10

Probably back then. Not a chance now. It's a known con for thieves where I am, strangely enough.

Greatbritish · 10/04/2024 21:09

The driver had planned in a loo break for the 5 hour trip @Sapphire387

The stop was over an hour away, which is why the problem needed solving.

OP posts:
Sapphire387 · 10/04/2024 21:06

@kellion unless you're asleep, it's pretty unusual to go nine hours without a wee. Even five is quite a long time. You should probably drink more water.

TowerRavenSeven · 10/04/2024 21:06

Nope

YeahComeOnThen · 10/04/2024 21:05

@Greatbritish in 1994 it was a different world. I would have without a second thought.

2024 yes, but only easily if we had a downstairs toilet, I'd let her, but I'd go upstairs with them both to 'show them where it us'. A bit uncomfortably if home alone but happily if another adult was home too.

Greatbritish · 10/04/2024 21:05

BettyShagter · 10/04/2024 21:01

No, probably not.

But why would you want to get the address anyway, and write a thank you card because someone else had a pee in his house?

Because I was grateful he helped?

Because it's nice to be nice?

That's what you've picked up on from my post? 🤦

OP posts:
XenoBitch · 10/04/2024 21:04

kellion · 10/04/2024 20:52

No, I wouldn't have even answered the door.

If I desperately needed to wee I wouldn't have knocked on a stranger's door, I would have just weed behind a bush. I would have been a bit unimpressed with friend for needing the loo during a 5 hour journey anyway, I've been on 9 hour flights and not needed the loo.

Fucking hell, the audacity for some people to have smaller bladders, or struggle to go long hours without peeing. I doubt anyone can help that!

User79853257976 · 10/04/2024 21:04

If I could see the coach etc then maybe yeah but I’d be scared of it not being genuine.

MolkosTeenageAngst · 10/04/2024 21:04

To get to my bathroom you have to go right through the house and upstairs so I wouldn’t let a stranger use it. I also live alone and have adhd, my bathroom isn’t always ‘guest ready’ in terms of cleanliness so there are times I would be embarrassed to have someone else use it without me at least giving it a wipe around first. So no, I wouldn’t let a stranger in but I wouldn’t have any issues with them going in my garden if desperate.

BettyShagter · 10/04/2024 21:01

No, probably not.

But why would you want to get the address anyway, and write a thank you card because someone else had a pee in his house?

BlancheSaysYes · 10/04/2024 21:00

I would let anyone in to use my loo if they were desperate.

Riverlee · 10/04/2024 20:59

On the basis that there was an obvious youth minibus nearby, I would have done . Maybe not if the teenager was by herself and I was by myself. Toilet is near front door which makes it easier.

itsgettingweird · 10/04/2024 20:59

But I e also let delivery drivers use my loo etc.

It's a loo. If you've gotta go ..... Grin

ThirtyThrillionThreeTrees · 10/04/2024 20:59

I would, teenage girl, clearly desperate and mini bus in view absolutely.

I wouldn't let everyone in and am highly suspicious by nature but yes.

I have endo bladder and a friend has kidney issues - sometimes when you have to do, you have to do.

What do people think would happen if they let a teenager in? Theft? Murder? Stranger never leaves?