DD angry at mature student for inappropriate email

Can we see the email? What was embarrassing about it?

I think it's hard being a mature student and especially when younger classmates take to judging and condemning normal adult behaviour, such as sending friendly emails.

Are you saying there were things in there directly about your DD that were embarrassing? Otherwise embarrassing for whom?

Why do parents get so over involved in their adult children's educational course anyway? It's weird!

'hard of reading'?

Agree. OP not coming off that well herself.

Why is the email embarrassing. The mature student is saying they’ve finished an assignment early. Where does the bragging come into it, I can only imagine if there is any bragging, it was done tongue in cheek. I think your daughter is likely envious she’s not finished hers yet.
If the email is in anyway inappropriate then I’m sure the lecturer will have a word with that particular student, or flag it with their own manager seeing how it’s gone public.
It’s hard being a mature student amongst a load of 18 year olds, without your daughter isolating them further and reporting them.
If she does report the message I would say it’s her that will end up looking foolish, not the other way round.

The fact that the email has been sent to the whole class will - I am sure - soon come to the attention of those who need to know.

I missed this bit about sleeping on it.

I’d also tell her that at best her formal complain would give the lecturers something to laugh about (although it’d be a complete waste of her time) but, most likely, at worst she’d end up embarrassing herself when posed with the inevitable question of “What exactly are you making a formal complaint about?”

Lecturers get to know their students over the course of three or more years. Mine did and I did a course where there were hundreds of us. I really wouldn’t have wanted them to remember me for this reason tbh. I received a congratulatory/farewell email from one senior professor I got to know (as I did a few of his modules and he oversaw my dissertation) after I finished and he put a kiss on the end! It was just his personality. Post grad students sometimes meet up with lecturers (and their families) for a drink/meal while they supervise them and stay in touch in the future.

No I mean by going bleating to her mummy about normal innocuous communications between two adults. And forming a pitchfork posse with other likeminded silly people.

But your response to me shows the apple didnt fall far. So good luck to the both of you.

It's none of her business! Can't believe she's even bothered, how bizarre!

I'm a relatively new lecturer but the age of more experienced lecturers as I got my PhD in my late 30s. I recently moved from teaching in a department which was almost exclusively female students to a department which is much more balanced. I was initially surprised at but now accustomed to the fact that a lot of the male students are a bit flirty. I am not conventionally attractive and it's clearly based in either a desire to get their grades up or some kind of power dynamic thing. It hasn't crossed a line yet but we have to report anything that makes us uncomfortable and there are processes to follow, precisely so that a thoughtless action by a student doesn't end up endangering our job. I highly doubt the lecturer in question is anything other than mortified by the email and your daughter is making jumps of conjecture by assuming it will lead to favouritism in marks.

As others have said, anonymous marking and moderation is the norm in most institutions now. I'm working through 100 essays this week and I have literally no idea who wrote what.

Probably a character defect but I loved watching shit hit the fan as a uni student.

I always got the popcorn out when my coursemates got into a public tizzy and went running to Mummy and the "authorities" over stupid things – it was a privileged uni, so a fair few coddled/entitled kids with little self awareness, though equally lots of independent and clever kids, all with the popcorn out too! – and embarrassed themselves in the process lol

This is a similar experience to me. I had more in common with my tutors than many of my fellow students.

No. By thinking it's any of her business at all, by wanting to bring it up "formally" and then saying she's going to "sleep on it" 😂

I work with post grad students and quite a few of them establish friendships with academics. They go out for drinks together, they know each other's families. It's not unusual at all.

Who will she report the email to?
what does she want to happen?
Why does she think it’s up to her to pass judgement?

Teach your daughter, some empathy - that mature student will be excruciatingly embarrassed. Perhaps she could think how best she could help.

It does not affect her in any way! Why would she report it - what has this person done wrong??

Sounds like she's still at school

Oh dear. I have to admit I cringed more for your DD and her mates more than the student who sent the email. I’d tell mine to grow up - albeit more politely and diplomatically - and to gain some perspective. The woman prob feels enough of a tit as it is.

And by the way, as an undergrad in late teens and early 20s, and then as a masters student, I had really good relationships with my professors, and even would go for a drink every now and then with them. Not an immature relationship at all and that you think so explains the overreaction by your daughter.

Seriously? Bloody hell, OP.

Also, why is the email embarrassing? The only thing of note is the 'send to all', and that was a mistake. Everything else is shit-stirring from your daughter and her mates.

I think you and your DD need to give your heads a wobble! Complete mountain out of molehill, by your daughter in relation to the email and by you in your responses on this thread!

Ha ha!

Your DD could reply to all saying "Please note that we can all read your replies if you reply to all. Good work on getting all the work in with time to spare!"

Now dd give your mum her phone back.... how on earth is @MrTiddlesTheCat in an 'immature relationship' if that's your context for relationships not meeting your approval everything else said so far needs to be seen totally differently!