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Original poster

To speak to my adult son's employer?

116 replies

blarneebeekeeper · 09/04/2024 19:20

My son (20) works for a large company that provides various services within a larger organisation, both are national and well known. My son applied, interviewed, and has a contract for a specific job role within the company. For reason that have not been disclosed, they have moved him from the role that he has being doing for over 2 years, to a similar titled, but very different role. His old role was not public facing at all, behind the scenes in a small team, the new roles is entirely public facing, communicating with people is probably 90% of the job, but its working with the public in its entirety. They have told him he has 2 options, he either does the new position, or he quits.

My Son is diagnosed ASD, has been for over 15 years. The company he works for are aware of this. I attended a recruitment event with him when he was just turned 18, and at the informal pre interview i was sat with him. They allowed me to attend the formal interview in order to help him complete paperwork, however i didn't go into the actual interview with him. They were aware at recruitment stages that he wanted a non-public facing position, as he didn't want to have to communicate with 100s of different people on a daily basis, that he wanted the job role he is contracted to do. They are also aware that my son likes routine and struggles with change that is thrusted on him without prior warnings. As such he does a set 4 on 4 off rota, instead of random shifts and has stayed in the same area of the organisation for the whole 2 years (the role he has covers about 8 different areas within the large organisation, my son does 1 of the areas every shift).

This change being unexpectedly forced upon him this morning has caused him to have a huge meltdown. I was on the phone with him for close to an hour as he was having an anxiety attack about being forced into a job role he isn't suitable for, because he doesn't have any say in the change, because this is a 2 year routine that he is in, going in and doing the same thing every single week. He cannot cope with this change. His emotional maturity is much younger than he actually is. But he has done so well in this role, he loves his job, he doesn't want to leave it. He has spoken in the past about how this is a job he can do for life and how pleased he was to have found a job he loves that fits his needs.

In the circumstances, would IBU to try and meet with his line manager with him, to communicate the things he cant? There's no union or similar, HR are not based in our city. The company is notoriously poor to work for, however up until now, barring some issues he was able to fix, they have been supportive of my son.

(Part of me is wondering as he is close to turning 21 if this is a way of getting rid of him before they have to give him a sizable pay rise)

OP posts:
Notimeforaname · 09/04/2024 20:38

Help him write an email from his own email address. Help him in the background.

RazzberryGem · 09/04/2024 20:37

I would draft an email or letter from "him" and get him to sign it/ send it!

Dis23 · 09/04/2024 20:36

The advocate can be his mother or a family member. There is nothing in law that prevents this. Anyone suitable. His mother may be the perfect person. She may even have the experience, qualifications and ability to do so. She may not. But it is possible.

MyMonkeyDanced · 09/04/2024 20:35

Hi. I work in OH and agree-write an email on your son’s behalf citing EA2010 and cc in the HR team. It is surprising how often managers make decisions without HR approval so they may be able to put a stop to this quickly. Contact ACAS and get advice. As a rule, the onus will be on the organisation to justify why the change is necessary or why they cannot uphold any reasonable adjustments especially if they have been in place for the past two years!

PerfectTravelTote · 09/04/2024 20:30

He probably does need someone to advocate for him but it really can't be his mother. Is there a union? Are HR any good?

KeyWorker · 09/04/2024 20:29

I think, unfortunately YWBU to contact his manager. However YWNBU to help him write an email as a PP suggested, mentioning his disability etc. you could also help him contact various charities who support young people in work. Does he have access to Occupational Health at work? I think an appointment with them may also be beneficial.

Ansarework · 09/04/2024 20:25

FYI other posters it is not unprofessional for a disabled person to utilise an advocate.

…To the extent that for an employer to refuse this may well amount to unlawful discrimination under the Equality Act.

DriftingDora · 09/04/2024 20:22

Please don't speak to his company yourself - it will not go down well. By all means help him to draft an email or memo. explaining his reasons, but contacting the company yourself will look ridiculous. He's a working adult, not a child.

Ansarework · 09/04/2024 20:19

FYI other posters it is not unprofessional for a disabled person to utilise an advocate.

Ansarework · 09/04/2024 20:17

@blarneebeekeeper for clarity an advocate can with permission of the person attend work meetings, be copied into correspondence and speak on behalf of the person when needed.

JLT24 · 09/04/2024 20:14

Contact ACAS.

They can’t significantly change his role without his consent, doing so would likely be a breach of his employment contract. They may advise him to put in writing that he is working ‘under protest’ due to the imposed changes and raise a written complaint/grievance so the company can investigate. If his current role is redundant he should be offered redundancy or a suitable alternative role. He may be entitled to request reasonable adjustments in the new role depending on if he has a disability as recognised under the Equality Act 2010.

Don’t speak to his employer yourself, keep it professional and support him with drafting his complaint email and seeking advice from ACAS/employment lawyer etc

Ansarework · 09/04/2024 20:14

@blarneebeekeeper it is perfectly reasonable for a person with disabilities to have an advocate. Also as your son is under 25 it is not unusual for example EHCPs run to 25 years old. As your son has ASD he has protections under the Equalities Act 2010 and is deemed a vulnerable adult. You or another appropriate adult may be his advocate with his permission. Together the advocate works with the person on the issues. You may wish to contact the national autistic society, his union, Acas, citizens advice or a law society for advice. As he has worked for the employer for 2 years he has employment rights. Good luck :)

soupmaker · 09/04/2024 20:11

If he has over 2 years service he has employment rights, which would make it less likely (but not impossible) that the employer is deliberately trying to get your DS to leave, as he would have the right to make a a claim constructive dismissal at ET.

Given the employer is aware of your DS' diagnosis and appears to have put reasonable adjustments in place for him at the very least an email to his manager (or whomever told him about the move) asking for the reasons why and what considerations have been made given his disability would be a good first move. Does he have anything from the employer in writing about this move?

As previously suggested, a call to ACAS for advice. Are you sure there is no suitable trade union, even if just for the purposes of individual representation?

PlasticOno · 09/04/2024 20:07

WinterDeWinter · 09/04/2024 19:52

I agree that you cannot have a word, but you absolutely should help him draft an email which he will send from his account, citing the Equalities Act and the duty of 'reasonable accommodations', and also stating that because of his disability (state the aspects of ASD which come into play here) he either needs to be accompanied by an advocate in face to face meetings or for all communications on this issue to be done in writing.

In other words, a letter which records what has been said by them so far, reminds them of their duties under the EA, and indicates that you are laying a paper trail and are generally not to be fucked with

With luck that will make them think that it's not worth the candle.

Edited

This is what I would do.

Notonmy · 09/04/2024 19:59

I am so sorry to hear this op, well done to your DS for managing to get and stay in a job long term. My DC also has ASD and I know how difficult it can be.
I think that you should contact the ACAS helpline, it’s free and they are usually very helpful. You could help your son write an email asking why he has been moved, explaining his difficulties and asking for reasonable adjustments. Surely, if it was to do with a wage increase that would apply to the new role? Good luck!

mathanxiety · 09/04/2024 19:56

Is he a member of a union?

BusMumsHoliday · 09/04/2024 19:53

I would help him draft an email and then see if you can source a professional disability advocate to help him. I know it shouldn't be an issue for him to have assistance advocating for his needs, but I think it will look bad if that's his mum. I say as someone whose DH is autistic and has held up signs to coach them through tricky phonecalls.

Another thought, could he request to have the conversation with his boss about the move via a text medium? And you could help him out behind the scenes? If he's got auditory processing difficulties, that would be a reasonable adjustment. My DH often asks that communications on emotive/challenging work subjects are all done by email.

WinterDeWinter · 09/04/2024 19:52

I agree that you cannot have a word, but you absolutely should help him draft an email which he will send from his account, citing the Equalities Act and the duty of 'reasonable accommodations', and also stating that because of his disability (state the aspects of ASD which come into play here) he either needs to be accompanied by an advocate in face to face meetings or for all communications on this issue to be done in writing.

In other words, a letter which records what has been said by them so far, reminds them of their duties under the EA, and indicates that you are laying a paper trail and are generally not to be fucked with

With luck that will make them think that it's not worth the candle.

Bestyearever2024 · 09/04/2024 19:51

blarneebeekeeper · 09/04/2024 19:49

I agree, its the why i cant fathom. He has done the job successfully for over 2 years, theres no reason from a work perspective of forcing him out, which is why i thought possibly the 21 year old pay rise which is now quite a jump.

Show quote history

Yes.....I'd chat to acas. Constructive Dismissal sounds an option.

Original poster
blarneebeekeeper · 09/04/2024 19:49

Bestyearever2024 · 09/04/2024 19:47

I mean no unkindness by this - but could they be moving him to an unsuitable role to encourage him to leave?

There will be a part of his contract which says that the organisation can expect him to do anything they deem suitable

I wonder if there is an underlying manipulative element to this role move

I agree, its the why i cant fathom. He has done the job successfully for over 2 years, theres no reason from a work perspective of forcing him out, which is why i thought possibly the 21 year old pay rise which is now quite a jump.

OP posts:
ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 09/04/2024 19:47

A lot of ASD people need an advocate. You are being your DS’s advocate, so l think it’s fine to contact the company.

Original poster
blarneebeekeeper · 09/04/2024 19:47

beetr00 · 09/04/2024 19:43

@blarneebeekeeper you've just said "I work within the larger organisation" which, to me, puts a slightly different spin on you approaching his manager.

I'd have an informal, low-key conversation with the manager wrt the changes in your son's position.

Would that be possible?

I don't work for the same company, essentially just in the same building, so i don't know his managers, or any management for that company, but i see, work alongside, and deal with their staff continuously so know when they are short staffed. Just happening upon them informally for a chat isnt possible really, i would have to seek them out or arrange it prior to it happening.

OP posts:
Bestyearever2024 · 09/04/2024 19:47

I mean no unkindness by this - but could they be moving him to an unsuitable role to encourage him to leave?

There will be a part of his contract which says that the organisation can expect him to do anything they deem suitable

I wonder if there is an underlying manipulative element to this role move

beetr00 · 09/04/2024 19:43

@blarneebeekeeper you've just said "I work within the larger organisation" which, to me, puts a slightly different spin on you approaching his manager.

I'd have an informal, low-key conversation with the manager wrt the changes in your son's position.

Would that be possible?

Anewuser · 09/04/2024 19:40

I would absolutely get involved. You’ve clearly empowered him up to now in order to successfully work for 2 years. It is not unreasonable that you want to continue supporting him.

I would write an email as it will be more concise. You need to quote the Equality Act 2010 not disability discrimination act (that’s old), and reasonable adjustments. I would also threaten constructive dismissal.

I wish you both good luck.