Do our household bills sound reasonable? What could be lower?

@itsalentilsone not asking, but if the private payment of 150 is debt/credit card you'd be better off paying that off than saving 160. You can get a cheaper Netflix. I wouldn't have the music and I wouldn't pay for apple storage. Dont know what qura ring is.

At the ripe old age of 43 i just found out about 50:30:20 rule for budgeting. Found it useful when trying to figure out how much to save.

50% of your income on essentials
30% on stuff you want
20% save

Of course need vs want us tricky. But 20% saving is useful to me.
I'm not too sure if saving say for a holiday should be in the 20% 'saving' or 30% 'want' so I'm still sort of working on it. But it's at least a guide.

Your broadband looks a bit on the high side. You should be able to get it down to £25/26 if you aren't still on a contract.

Can you make your car cheaper at all? Is that HP or PCP?

Is that your electric a month? Mine is £50 a week in a tiny two bed. Don't get me started on the cost of hearing oil!

Do you pay council tax over 10 months? Most councils will let you pay over 12 months if you're not in arrears. You won't pay less over the course of the year but it will spread payments thinner.
Does your water bill include sewerage? See if your water company provides water saving devices if you're on a meter. It will reduce both the water and the sewerage parts of the bill. Also look at social tariffs and non return to sewer allowances.

You have £1k plus unaccounted for ever month.

You need to set yourself a "fun money/treats" limit every month and when it's gone, it's gone.

Messing around will the small money seems crazy when there's such a big unaccounted for money issue.

Also,if you are really struggling to account for it, put the extra £1k into a immediate access account at savings account as soon as you get it. Then everything you take out becomes a conscious choice rather than a passive purchase. People tend to spend current account money quicker than savings account money.

Are you paying a car loan or a pcp? If it’s a loan then the cost will end at some point and you’ll have the car. If it’s a pcp see when you can change it without penalties and either buy a car outright or get a car loan

Service charges are ridiculous
I'm in a 2 bed in the NW and pay £200pm

£160 is a random amount to save. It’s also quite small considering your disposable income. Can you increase to £250?

This!

The eating out and extra spending is where you are likely to have to cut back I'm afraid if you are getting to the end of your money before the month ends.

I can't really see anything else really obvious, except car payment and that ring thing that I haven't heard of before. Seems and awful lot of money per year for a fitness tracker. I'd get a cheap Fitbit second hand and use that instead.

Do you need the income protection insurance? A lot of people are over insured - check work benefits first before adding insurance.

For exmaple I don't bother with life insurance as I have no children and my work death in service benefit will more than pay off our mortgage.

Broadband shouldn't be more than £20 a month . Have a look online at comparison sites and then check cashback websites for cashback for that particular provider.
Your bills are ok but I’d cut back eating out to once a month until you have a good buffer saved. How much you have in savings will/ should dictate how you spend the spare money per month. Cut out eating out until you have 3-6 months expenses saved.

Impressed with grocery/electric & gas - that's really good.
Do you need the £10.99 Netflix premium plan with HD/multiple screens & without ads?
Can you make do with the bog standard £4.99 plan/1 screen with ads? That's what we have.
We ditched Amazon prime as that was £90 we could have done without paying annually.
Do you need Amazon music? Lots of songs on Spotify are free last time I looked & can link it to Alexa I think?

I had to look up an oura ring I thought it sounded like some kind of contraceptive device :)

Just eat less cake and nice things and get rid of it, kind of joking.

Get all your statements and make a massive spreadsheet with all outgoings, if you never draw out cash it’s easy done and I know there are some apps that can do this but we have a nice old fashioned spreadsheet and know out exact outgoings and it’s free. You are bleeding money on unknown fun, your actual sensible bills look fine.

Did you shop about for car insurance? I just found a better deal for MIL thats going to save her 210 PA, also play yearly. A car gets you from A to B and car finance is one of the worst how much is the apr? Probably 25% or something horrendous. Tell him to stop worrying about how he looks, we have an older car, its the worst on the road as we live in road where people have top of the range Tesla and Mercs, but who cares really.

It's not the bits that you have listed that really need trimming. It's the unaccounted for 1k a month that is dissapering that needs to be identified as to what is necessary and what is not.

This. None of what you've written is easily reduced.

The most illuminating thing to do would be go through last 3 months transactions and see where the £1k/month fun money has gone. There may be more easy wins there.