To think I’m entitled to child maintenance?

50/50 custody does not mean you aren’t entitled. CMS is about ensuring that the child has an equal quality of life based on both parents earnings. They absolutely do not expect wealthy life with one and not the other.

The calculator is accurate. File for an official claim, he’s a game player and you’re far better off outsourcing that game.

Sometimes you do get maintenance with 50/50. It happened to someone I work with.

He says, “The calculator is incorrect.” Riiiiight…..😒

They don’t pay it 50/50 though. I use it to pay for school lunches/ the inevitable school requests for cash / replacement school ties/ school trips and residential It’s not a lot of money to be fair.

If it's 50/50 he should be getting half of the child benefit!

He absolutely doesn't. He's battled and fought CMS for 18mths. And they simply say "she is the primary carer so is entitled" Primary carer is because she claims the Child Benefit and the kids are registered at her address for the GP. He's been in and asked them and they say they can only have one address!

I've listened to the phone calls and read the letters. They aren't interested.

OP, I think there are probably two things to consider here:

As everyone says, it's worth checking in directly with CMS and/or making a claim.

But, if he's even vaguelly reasonable, the conversation to be had with him is about why? So I'm guessing he's been paying to contribute to nursery or other childcare fees? Do these miraculously go away when the child goes to school? eg if you do 50/50 but there still needs to be wraparound care is he going to pay 50% of this?

And then, as others have pointed out, if he's not going to pay any child support and he IS going to do 50/50 care, does he fully understand that that is not just rent and food? But also clothes, hobbies, clubs etc? is he paying half of school uniform, half of all other clothing, half of dance/football/piano or whatever extra curricular she signs up for, half for any birthdy presents (for her, or any parties she goes to) etc etc.

And of course, there's a moral element here too - if he accepts he has to pay this stuff, is there anyway he would consider paying these things proportionally? I saw a women on here relatively recently who said they have a joint account for this sort of expense which they can both access to pay for clothes/clubs/activities etc. When it runs out, they both pay in but she pays in less as he earns more. That felt like a really mature and responsible approach to me.

If it's 50:50, of course neither of you is entitled to maintenance!. I suspect at the moment, it's not maintenance you receive. It's just that you split payment childcare fees equally and your ex gives you half so that you can physically pay it altogether, rather than the nursery receiving 2 payments.

Tbf if he has them 50% of the time then he is doesn't the other parent have a responsibility to provide

This thread just shows how difficult all this is for single parents.

I have full custody of my children (username gives it away) and get no CM at the moment since he stopped paying when he lost his job - case is open with the CMS just now as to what he should be paying if anything. How do people split the costs when doing 50/50? Keep a spreadsheet and running “IOU” total? Get the other parents permission to buy anything as it will be jointly funded? Any what goes on the spreadsheet vs what is a treat by the buying parent and not considered a cost of “maintaining” them? What if parents incomes vary hugely and treats flow freely from one parent and can’t be afforded by the other? Sounds exhausting and really difficult to manage - and the potential source of many arguments and resentments :(.

Your partner does have some control over this if he pays plus going halves on everything aswell that isn't down to CMS!

This. Just put the claim in op

The only way you will know for definite is to put a claim in.

Stop telling OP to use the calculator please!!

This is what it says.

"You will not have anything to pay through the Child Maintenance Service if you are:

• sharing care equally with the other parent
• a full-time student with no income
• in prison:

The calculator is not designed to be used for 50/50 care

I think in some circumstances, when there is a significant disparity in income (and therefore what each parent can provide for the child) there should be a mechanism to mitigate the disparity.

Note that I said ‘some’ and ‘mitigate’, not ‘all’, and ‘equalise’.

Anyway, it appears that indeed there is such a mechanism.

Exactly I have heard of this too

@Blondeyoghurt not always true! My friend knows someone who has to pay ex partner so much per week even though they share 50/50 care of the children! one parent earns more so it is to keep the standard of living in each home for the children equal!

I'm not sure who this is aimed at, possibly my post for referring to a comment as stupid.

But if you're going to be so misinformed about the disproportionate hardship and abuse women suffer financially (and otherwise) at the hands of men then you deserve to be called out on it, especially when you are making comments like that on a public forum.

Does he have any more children as that can make a difference

No because he's not in receipt of child benefit

What about the gender pay gap?

@Blondeyoghurt there's no way they'd say that, and even if they did they are wrong. They can only tell you to make a claim and it will be calculate from the info given. It sounds like you have her more then 50% i also dont get why he's paying it now, but not once she starts school. Yeah cos school kids need less.

Why do some people on the internet feel the need to be so nasty?

I would check how many extra night you've had your child over the past 6mths to a year and work out what percentage that is. Also does he contribute to clothes etc?

"women can't afford to squirrel away money"

"if a man squirels away money he's financially abusive"

Please do the math yourself.