Man in ladies’ loo

Women don't bring their sons into the mens toilets.

Generally speaking, you would expect the adult to take the child into the gendered toilets , so in this case the dad to take his daughter into the gents. However, could it be the gents toilets were in a bit of a state (they often are according to my partner ,especially in a park) and so he then went into the ladies instead? If that was the scenario, I wouldn't have an issue with that if they were straight in and out.

Wouldn’t worry me any more than it would a woman alone with a toddler.

I would have peed and got on with my life.

Apart from one person saying preteen girls shouldn't go the toilet unsupervised, still no one has answered whether they would be happy with their 8-10yo girl in a toilet alone with a random man only accompanied by a toddler...

Yep. Did the same when my daughter was young. Managed to never have to go in the ladies toilets & I'm sure if I had, I wouldn't have been commenting on anyone else in there.

They can wait a minute, have you ever tried?

@SparklyBracelet so which female in this equation have you decided is more important than the other? The small female child less important than the adult woman? Or is it better in your opinion that the child is brought into the male toilets and possibly exposed to a strangers genitalia? Is that really less harmful to you than a man using a cubicle with his child when everyone is fully clothed and covered in the communal areas??

I have two boys and I’ve always taken them into the Ladies with me. My youngest is 8 and on a camping trip I brought him into the ladies showers with me so we could shower together as I wasn’t about to send him alone to the men’s. One mother there got upset with me, so I apologised and explained the situation and she shrugged it off - she wasn’t happy. I mean, he’s 8. He’s not looking around, he’s just showering with me and that’s all. Everyone has their issues about this, but I suppose this man should really have taken her with him to the men’s and used a cubicle.

Agree I wouldn’t want a young female child in the gents loo.

Bold fail

Here we go. All about keeping the trans out.

Who mentioned trans @ilovesooty?

Really?! I used to work in a place where one of the women systematically left each of the toilet cubicles in the women's bathrooms unusable by the end of the day. Women can be disgusting unfortunately that's not just a male trait.

Depends on how old the child is for me, up to about 5 then I think they need supervision and possibly help, over that he could wait outside, so if around that age I wouldn't have an issue with it because I certainly didn't want my DD exposed to the use of urinals at that age, and we all know how younger ones can get distracted, touch things they shouldn't and just not get on with what they're supposed to be doing without someone prompting - not to mention it can be a scary proposition for a younger child.

So if a little one he didn't have much in the way of choices as far as I can see. Not ideal but if fathers are to spend time with their daughters alone and there isn't the facility for them to use a separate toilet to male and female, without infringing on disabled toilets, then there's not much choice really.

The commentary was a bit 😳 but then you see a lot of performance parenting around from male and female. And young kids are curious and chatter nonsense which most people humour, although I would have said that we don't talk about other people when OP was brought into it.

I mean I'm not a 'Not my Nigel' because I don't have a Nigel, or anyone else for that matter, and I'm well aware of what men can be capable of unfortunately, and it would have made me a bit uncomfortable to be honest but I'd also be thinking that the little girl in the men's due to the layout etc would be worse on balance.

Here we go. All about keeping the trans out. 🙄

Of course we can exclude them. We don’t need to make this into something it’s not

Absolutely. It’s the aggressive entitlement

It doesn't bother you. It bothers other people. Your coolness about a man in a female only space doesn't make it okay. If we make it normal for men to be anywhere and everywhere that is for females then we can no longer exclude the ones who are not there because of a child who needs to wee.

At my local shopping centre there is a large baby changing with a child’s cubicle, BF cubicle and two change tables and my husband has been challenged for changing our child in there before.

Him doing that commentary is giving off pervert vibes. I don't believe a decent man would do that in the ladies.

I would not have a problem if he was bringing his young daughter in there.
Completely inappropriate taking her to the men's toilets.

The guy was trying to do the best for his daughter in circumstances which were not ideal. Obviously embarrassed and defensive when he was challenged
I’d be tempted to show some tolerance

It is a pretty difficult situation for fathers of daughters.

Last week at an English Heritage place I was rather taken aback to come across a man in the ladies but the baby changing facilities were only accessible by going through the ladies.

Men's toilets need to be more suitable for fathers.

I was with my dad constantly as a child and went into a lot of men’s toilets as a result. He’d just poke his head in first and call out “Alright to bring my daughter in?” or something like that. If there were men using the urinals they’d finish up first and then we’d go in. Or if they hadn’t started they’d offer to wait until we were done. I never saw anything indecent and never felt weird or upset about it.

On the few occasions when he felt the men’s was either too dirty or it didn’t have stalls he would send me into the women’s and stand near the outer door so he could hear me if I needed to call him. I remember one time it was busy and I kept hearing him say “Sorry, just waiting for my daughter!” over and over as women came in. 😂

No reason men today can’t do the same. It seems ridiculous that they’d rather risk making women uncomfortable than communicate with other men.

Have you ever had a young child? When they need to go, they need to go.