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Original poster

I feel like my daughters dance school is inappropriate

312 replies

grossedouteurgh · 05/04/2024 23:48

Got back this evening from my daughter's dance school performance at the local arts center and was horrified.

Prefacing this by saying I have had a few issues in the past with what I feel is money grabbing (introduced a charge of £20 recently to drop kids off in the car park. Their studio is on an industrial estate - why?!! This only serves to put safety at risks/makes money).

Also feel they have such a feeling of superiority and favouritism at the school which I don't think is healthy to foster in teens and pre teens.

Anyway, got home this evening from the Easter dance show and literally feel sick. I've seen more clothes on moulin rouge dancers and the way they had them gyrating over the stage is just gross. I filmed some of it because it genuinely felt like a strip club, and if that was my daughter I'd be horrified (she's still in a class below).

I obviously won't share but we're talking flash dance style, suspenders, gyrating... from 15/16/17 y olds.

It made me feel so awful.

I guess the parents in this situation are brainwashed by the school and it's a step to the next thing?

What can I do? I don't want to let this lie.

OP posts:
BettyShagter · 06/04/2024 00:06

grossedouteurgh · 06/04/2024 00:04

She's been at this school three years but this is the worst I've seen it. The girls were wearing suspenders and I guess underwear (or what looked like underwear) for a Chicago number. I get that this is in keeping with the musical but they're all under 18 so can't consent to it themselves. I've seen strippers wear more in Las Vegas

I just think if there were nefarious people in the theatre - yuck. That's my daughter in a couple of years (and other people's daughters right now)

Show quote history

That's my daughter in a couple of years

You must be so errrm....proud of your parenting?

Original poster
grossedouteurgh · 06/04/2024 00:04

Foxesandsquirrels · 05/04/2024 23:59

It really depends on the dance school. You vote with your feet in this instance. I found schools in outside London, esp home counties seemed to be especially bad with this. Esp schools that compete in DFR.... For some reason they've taken a very American pageant type style.
My DDs dance school in London was never like this and still isn't. I do think the type of dance styles on offer really do tell you a lot about how the school will be. Schools market themselves heavily on social media too, so it's unlikely you wouldn't have seen pics from previous shows tbh.

She's been at this school three years but this is the worst I've seen it. The girls were wearing suspenders and I guess underwear (or what looked like underwear) for a Chicago number. I get that this is in keeping with the musical but they're all under 18 so can't consent to it themselves. I've seen strippers wear more in Las Vegas

I just think if there were nefarious people in the theatre - yuck. That's my daughter in a couple of years (and other people's daughters right now)

OP posts:
BettyShagter · 06/04/2024 00:04

grossedouteurgh · 05/04/2024 23:56

You can know what flash dance is and be in your mid thirties?

I don't feel like it's enough to pull my daughter out though - how can I report this/escalate it? I feel there's so many vulnerable girls here on a stage with no clothes on, dressed up as art/dance and it's not right.

I say this as someone who spent their teens dancing. I never felt taken advantage of.

Gyrating in suspenders aged from just 15

You genuinely felt it was like a strip club

And yet you don't feel like it's enough to pull your daughter out???

Fucking hell.

Foxesandsquirrels · 05/04/2024 23:59

It really depends on the dance school. You vote with your feet in this instance. I found schools in outside London, esp home counties seemed to be especially bad with this. Esp schools that compete in DFR.... For some reason they've taken a very American pageant type style.
My DDs dance school in London was never like this and still isn't. I do think the type of dance styles on offer really do tell you a lot about how the school will be. Schools market themselves heavily on social media too, so it's unlikely you wouldn't have seen pics from previous shows tbh.

Original poster
grossedouteurgh · 05/04/2024 23:56

You can know what flash dance is and be in your mid thirties?

I don't feel like it's enough to pull my daughter out though - how can I report this/escalate it? I feel there's so many vulnerable girls here on a stage with no clothes on, dressed up as art/dance and it's not right.

I say this as someone who spent their teens dancing. I never felt taken advantage of.

OP posts:
LovePoppy · 05/04/2024 23:54

If you don’t like it, leave.

I doubt they will change the dances for you

ButterflyKu · 05/04/2024 23:54

Move to another club asap

saltinesandcoffeecups · 05/04/2024 23:53

I think you went a bit overboard with the flash dance reference…

If that is what your frame of reference is, then your children are grown ass adults

Countrygirlxo · 05/04/2024 23:53

Take your child out. I never wore make up or fake tan in my dance classes at that age, now they're caked in it.

Catsmere · 05/04/2024 23:52

I'd get her out of there immediately.

NeverDropYourMooncup · 05/04/2024 23:52

Put her in a different club. Sorted.

CountFucula · 05/04/2024 23:51

Yup. They are always like that. Don’t send your kids - they make them dress up like Lolita and cover them in hairspray. Weird.

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