Husband embarrassed when I felt unwell

You weren’t “ill” you reacted badly to drinking on an empty stomach, I’d be mortified on your shoes and pissed off in your DHs

I'd understand some of the criticism levelled at OP if she was steaming pissed. But she had 2 proseccos. Calling someone embarrassing for falling temporarily unwell is really harsh.
It doesn't sound like it was a high drama situation, but husband kept on turning it into a row. Saying that 'you must present well as a couple' sounds so superficial it makes me feel pretty grossed out. Did he want her to stand there grinning then suddenly vomit over the bride and her mother?!

OP. I don’t think you should judge your DH on this. Weddings of mates from a different time in your life are always a bit weird. Instant regression. He was poss feeling mildly anxious. I can see how he might have felt embarrassed and acted out a bit. I would just let that go and not overthink it. You say you thought he might apologise once sober - but did you? I don’t think what you did was terrible at all - but I would have started off with an
apology to him as he was clearly upset. Based on the number of people on here being so mortified at the thought of a head on a table - you must have all been to some pretty dull weddings 😆

Tbh, I think your post title should be DP embarrassed when I got drunk and was unwell at a wedding.

Well yes, this.

As for those claiming no-one could get drunk on two Proseccos on an empty stomach - my late mother was 4 feet 10 and under 7 stone in weight. Not only she have been DRUNK on two Proseccos on an empty stomach, she'd probably be ASLEEP with her head on the the table. But she knew that about herself so drank in extreme moderation.

In answer to OP, if a partner put his head on the table during the wedding speeches at my good pal's wedding, I'd be alarmed because:

1. I'd think they were either madly drunk

or

2. really very ill (like, ambulance needed ill).

But at least you know for next time how Prosecco affects you on an empty stomach.

I mean if I'd been sat on your table I'd still be finding it amusing that you were wasted at that point, but I'm not your partner and I can understand why he was embarrassed.
Personally I'd forget about it now apart from the lesson of making sure you at least snack before drinking, rookie error right there.

Fucking hell, imagine caring more about appearances in front of your friends than your partner's wellbeing. Putting your head down for a bit if you don't feel well is, in any sane universe, fine. People would be able to see you aren't doing it for the fun of it.

I would have been really annoyed I'd this was my DP. Its their wedding day speeches - something that cannot be repeated (well, not to each other anyway) and you're drunk with your head on the table.

I would have been completely mortified. I bet the people at your table were put out having you as a distraction and hoping that you wouldn't throw up at the table.

And somehow the OP was the only person in the room to be affected by the "long day" and "lack of food"...

I would have been mortified if my DH had behaved like that in front of my friends. During a wedding. In the speeches.

Yep. Mortifying.

So would I! And then really annoyed because basically, OP wasn’t “unwell” but pissed. In front of all his Uni friends! 😱

It's too late now OP, you did what you thought was best in the moment.

Lots of people have commented on my post saying that putting her head on the table was odd that OP was ill and stealthily moving away could have resulted in further drama. But, at least in my head, I have a picture of everyone dressed to the nines and OP face planting the table with all the crockery and glasses surrounding her. At least pushing her chair back and head between your knees as recommended would look like you were ill - which you were, opposed to well I'm not quite sure. I do wonder if you got caught in the background of any of the photos though.

I would have been embarrassed and annoyed, you are an adult you know not to drink on a empty stomach or to go a long time without food especially at a wedding or similar. But you know now and I suspect wouldn't d it again.

yep!

A lot of this issue is due to the wedding being a long day, no food served until late but lots of drinks served.

Weddings involve lots of travel, ceremony etc. You may eat at home at 9am but between ceremony and drinks reception, dinner is not served til 7pm or later.

It seems at weddings, that it ia socially unacceptable to eat a sandwich in the car at 2pm, or to order sandwiches at the drinks reception at 4pm.

I know you could have excused yourself, but the right thing would have been to bring some food in the car and eat it discreetly. Some people are very spiteful and may talk and laugh if you have something small. As you have found out, people will talk if you feel unwell after drinks and having no food.

I get dizzy and weak with such a long fast and cannot eat the wedding dinner!! As I am surrounded by spiteful people I take a protein bar to the bathroom and eat that. No one sees, I have an odd drink, and can 'fast' away for the day.

Wtf

How do people that are so concerned about what others will think actually live their lives?

Slightly woozy rather than pissed I would have thought

Indeed.

Are you lower middle class?

I have a POTs like illness and am prone to fainting. The advice from numerous doctors I've seen over the years is that when an episode comes on I need to put my head on a table or ideally lie down on the floor or on a bed or sofa.

Initially I ignored that advice and made myself worse. I now follow the advice - I've had to lie on many a bench before. I would have done the same as OP as the alternative would be risking a full on faint which would be much more dramatic.

It's in my workplace adjustment passport that if my head suddenly goes on my desk I need some water, some full fat coke and my emergency chocolate rations. This has happened a few times at different workplaces and no-one has found this rude.

I don't drink as unfortunately alcohol is a trigger for my symptoms, especially if I've not had much to eat. It's one of the reasons I always have a full English the morning of a wedding.

fuck being embarrassed. His wife is feeling unwell and he’s embarrassed? Fuck that. It was 2 glasses of prosecco so defo not alcohol related. It’s not like she was necking straight whisky.

what else is going to embarrass him?

@BeretRaspberry
I agree. I’m now alcohol intolerant due to ME/CFS, so don’t I don’t drink at all now. However, before I realised what it was, I had a few occasions where even just half a glass of Buck’s Fizz for, example, made me feel really ill, like woozy and sick. I never drank loads anyway, mostly a few glasses of BF or Asti over Christmas and on other occasions. Sometimes I might have managed a glass of it and felt ok but others it knocked me sick. It was weird and no pattern to it. Obviously I realised after a while I just couldn’t handle it at all anymore so I avoid it completely now.

This is what happened to me. One time I'd be fine then one time I wouldn't be. The number of restaurants and events I was at when I suddenly had to leave or collapsed made me decide I had to stop drinking as it was too unpredictable. It's so fast and so random. I could go out and have alcohol 10 times and be fine but on the 11th I could pass out. Even when I'd eaten. Infact when I'd eaten I would vomit Upon coming to. Or I would make it to the loo and throw up and my blood pressure would stabilise. Usually evacuate my bowels too.

It's not something people can predict and it's not their fault. Imagine telling people who fall into a diabetic coma that it's their fault

The partner needs educating if his biggest concern was feeling embarrassed

To be honest you did drink on a empty stomach you made that choice so yes i absolutely see why your DH was embarrassed everyone probably thought you was drunk and also felt awkward by you putting your head on the table feeling dizzy unwell or not you made that choice to do what you did drinking alcohol without eating first

So you can't handle your drink, and embarrassed him (and yourself) in public by putting your head on the table? During the speeches???

And he was right about you being able to stand up and exit the room?

Imagine a man behaving like that at a wedding. He would be slaughtered on here.

@sandyhappypeople

The point is this sudden and catastrophic drop in blood pressure can happen to someone who has never had it before and isn't related to drunkenness.

There are contributing factors: having a lower typical blood pressure, alcohol on an empty stomach, viruses, pregnancy. But it can be so out of anything you've had before that you can't blame a person when it happens.

My first episode was half a glass of wine in a restaurant whilst eating lunch. I felt clammy etc and tried to make it to the toilet but ended up fall-running and collapsed part way there.

It's not funny. It's horrible and deserves concern not blame.

I found it happened again so I stopped drinking. But it was nothing to do with being drunk and chances are the OP like many people had previously drunk on an empty stomach with no problems.

OP, your "D"P was a dick.

I wonder what he thinks about his partner who drank 'only two proseccos' on an empty stomach and put her head down on the table. The other guests almost certainly noticed and were wondering who this woman was he'd brought to their friends wedding! It would have been far less rude to have excused oneself and left, escaping the speeches would have been a bonus!