AIBU to feel disheartened by the lack of support and the presence of a crab bucket mentality among some women on here?

I disagree. The level of whining about trivia on here is off the scale. But that's not to say I don't read and reply. Be really boring if everyone agreed.

I understand what you mean the "just move somewhere cheaper" people irritate the fuck out of me I live in a cheap area my son used to be able to get the bus to school on our road but thanks to cutbacks they decided in OCTOBER last year to remove the service (he had just started the run up for GCSES) so I know people will say "just walk" to school it's actually too far away well you should send him somewhere closer I can't he has sen this was the best school fit for his needs "sen children get transport" they do if they have an EHCP the school claim they meet need without one 😀 your just "making excuses" to use your car no im really not "JUST MOVE" even if I did I would still be unable to cut costs by not using my car because if I moved I would be moving away from my OTHER child's school 🤣😭

Mumsnet is no place for unwinnable situations and sadly that's what a lot of people are facing right now

No, that's completely different.
Thatcher's comment was about a neo-liberal approach to state intervention, and taxpayers subsidising individuals and businesses.
The Sisterhood is a mythical idea usually used by men against women to put them down if they don't display a hive mind.

I don’t generally join in pile ons but I also resent being told to ‘lift each other up’ or that women should be supporting women - it’s saccharine and nauseating.

I do agree that mumsnet seems mainly wealthy and lots of posters have no idea what real life is like for most people.
I laughed to myself yesterday when someone was posting about their tired and broken house which really needed money spent on it and one bright spark asked how much do you spend on your holidays just drop one of them.

I don't think suggesting that someone struggling to live in the most expensive part of the country might wish to consider moving somewhere affordable is 'tearing another woman down', its just an option that many who manage without living in the SE may consider valid. All the OP needs to do is say thanks but I'd rather stay here, surely? No need for offence to be taken. I also think its important to remember that empathy goes both ways. A person on a high income who is struggling because and only because they are living in the SE, is still going to appear to have won lifes lottery to a person living on benefits in a cheap area who can't afford their shopping. There should be empathy for that too, and understanding that while a lot of people may be struggling, like it or not, there are hierarchies of poverty, and recognition of the privelege of not being at the bottom of that doesn't go amiss.

It's a good sentiment on a basic level...but the fact is, we're not borg.

An example is some of the mother in law threads...I sometimes get the strong feeling that it's a daughter in law issue. A controlling, jealous, self-aggrandising daughter in law issue.
I'm not going to tell her she's a peach and her dh needs to side with her.

Are you saying I'm like a bucket of crabs? Two pigs wrestling in a sack would be closer.

Mumsnet is an incredibly supportive place. I've been here 16 years.

However when someone needs their arse handed to them on a plate it's handed to them.

When someone needs tough love it's given.

Woman and men here are extremely aware of poverty and low incomes and are very supportive and knowledgable about it and where to get support.

Sometimes on AIBU people pile in unnecessarily but the trick is not to post on AIBU when you have an actual serious issue 😂

Agree with above poster that woman shouldn't be some kind of stereotypical "sisterhood". We've been fighting to be recognised as intelligent individuals who can contribute equally to the world for centuries.

I see @pootlin .

I agree with the majority of PP. We’re not a homogeneous group.

Some boards are very supportive though.

This rather reminds me of Thatcher's comment in days of yore: 'there is no such thing as society'.
Ditto The Sisterhood.

Bad women, having own thoughts. Bad Bad women.

These threads never go well - you'll be inundated with replies telling you to get a grip.

I don't think MN ever has been a particularly supportive site. Not in my experience of on/off since about 2010.

Occasionally a thread on the main boards will take off and be popular, and I've heard some of the lesser known boards can be very supportive but on the whole, I don't think it's the place to come for support. Advice? Yes, but not support.

It's the story that if you put one crab in a bucket it will climb out.
But if you put lots in, none get out because as soon as one starts climbing up the others pull it down.

If a woman in the top 5% of earnings comes on here and moans about the COL because of her huge mortgage, no, I'm not going to be sympathetic.
I don't have binary opinions - women good, men bad etc

This is an anonymous forum. Your expectations are too much. You have no idea who anyone is.

I think she means stepping on other crabs/womento get to the top of the bucket and out.

Not really. I like this forum for its brutal honesty! If you want platitudes and blind agreement talk to your friends.

Shouldn't this space be about rallying together to support everyone in the UK?
No. This website has people posting from all over the world which you would have known if you were a long time poster. You would also know about the monthly threads complaining about this site going downhill as well.

the presence of a crab bucket mentality among some women on here?
Men post here too. Why are you only kicking the women?

crab bucket mentality
What's that?

What on earth is a “crab bucket mentality”

I'm sorry but this reads as "I'm very privileged but less so than I used to be, I thought I could come here and moan and get patted but instead people told me that a joint income of circa £100k pa is plenty to be getting on with, even in the South East, and others have to make do in far less."

What the heck is a crab bucket mentality?

It’s a forum with millions of users, you will get a broad range of opinions and views.

Women are not a homogeneous body of support workers.

It’s better to tell people the truth. I wish I knew about MN in my 20s.