Is it lazy or AIBU?

I completely agree with @Lovetotravel123 The OPs husband is being lazy and disrespectful. If he was leaving takeaway wrappers all over the place or mess and crumbs all over the kitchen that the OP had to clean up on a daily basis people would say he was selfish and LTB. Why is this mess any different? He literally won’t take 2 minutes to change into clean clothes and prevent something expensive getting ruined. I couldn’t stay with someone with so little respect for me and our home.

It would take an entire two minutes to get changed, maybe ten jf you shower as well. It's all about respect and basic cleanliness (never mind basic manners).
I could not respect him

Only on MN 😂

I would have put a throw on the sofa. That's something you learn to do when you have cats!!

He can relax while having a nice shower.

So you work, as well as doing the laundry and hoovering and tidying… what does this hero do domestically apart from shit the place up?

Yep - you've nailed it! His relaxation shouldn't take priority over ruining the furniture or the comfort of others in the home. Plus, he can lay down and relax in the bath whilst getting clean!!!

Like Marie had in Everybody Loved Raymond!

I couldn’t live with someone like this. It would actually be a deal breaker for me!

My husband does the same. Fucking irritating. We have leather sofas which helps. He also walks around with work boots/gardening boots when he can't be arsed to take them off.

My dad was in construction. Minute he got home, boots in the hallway, he was in the shower. Dirty clothes in the washing machine. Without fail.

Do you have a garage? My mate goes in the garage, puts his overalls in the washing bin and changes into something else, so doesn't have to be an immediate shower if your DH likes one later on. Always a pile of home wear ready for him to put on, takes no time yet he doesn't have to feel the need to get scrubbed immediately. Xx

I understand how he feels, he's knackered and just wants to flop. That's how I feel when I come in from work. I agree with putting a throw on it.

It's bloody rude. He doesn't care because a dirty sofa is no skin off his arse and he doesn't have to clean it, and the fact he's making work for OP doesn't even register. He'd be pissed off if he'd spent the day at work and someone came along afterwards and knocked down a wall a wall he'd built though wouldn't he.

I'd tell him fine - he may sit on the fabric sofa and muck it up every day he comes in from work........HOWEVER he must buy a professional steam cleaner for sofas and spend time PROPERLY cleaning it each evening before he goes to bed.

DF was in flooring. He always came in through the garage into the outhouse/utility and changed there before coming into the house.
DM was a SAHM but he respected the clean house

Some of the comments here talking about letting him relax and reminding you it's his home too are prioritising him over you. His relaxation time. His comfort in his home. His actions aren't benign. He's actively ruining a piece of furniture that in all probability was expensive, which you financially contributed towards (even if that contribution looked like staying at home with the children so he could work).

If he sat all over your clothes every evening, it would be immediately obvious how disrespectful his behaviour is. But because he's sitting on something he also owns, he takes priority? No. He's destroying property that jointly belongs to you.

Honestly he sounds grim enough that I probably couldn't stay with him.

What type of dust does he have on him? I wouldn't accept bringing containments into the house. But then my DH is a firefighter, so we have this drummed into us! 😂

Ask his advice on which new sofa to buy, show him catalogues or send links online. Mention that you are worried that having such a dirty sofa might affect children's health so needs replacing. Might get this attention. In the meantime use an old sheet when he gets home. Easier to wash than a throw!

My father wore overalls for his job, they came straight off when he came in and there was only one chair he would sit in, whilst in the work clothing he had on underneath, in the kitchen and that usually had a throw over it. He absolutely would not have gone anywhere else in the house in his overalls and certainly not the sofa in his work gear.

Make sure you have a seperate blanket otherwise he will take the throw off and use it as a blanket. Only saying as you said sometimes he gets under a blanket.

He feels the opposite way though after a hard physical day and it's his home too. A throw is a simple solution

If you're dirty you wash yourself. If you have a job that makes you dirty then you have to wash when you get in from work. Really unacceptable to just spread dirt around the house for other people to clean up. I'd be very cross. If you can't get him to cooperate though then the throw is a good idea.

Does he actually own enough work clothes? I wouldn't want to wear the same t-shirt for three days in a row sitting at desk all day.

Yeah, mine's a joiner and puts his shorts on as soon as he gets in as his kecks are always covered in sawdust and glue. Doesn't need telling.