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AIBU?

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Original poster

What to say to sexist salesman asking for my 'husband' to be present for quote? Should i say something?

332 replies

Sailawaygirl · 04/04/2024 11:52

So man selling windows (well known company) came to door saying he had done some work on a house up street and they have a good deal atm ect ect. It just so happens I do need new windows and getting quotes is on my todo list so for once door knock could be helpful. ( i will obviously contact more than just his company but its a start)

my AIBU is --- in door step conversation he asks if we own house ( obviously important). he then asks if I have a husband, I say yes ( we arent married but I know what he means and he is probably asking for finance reasons ect)
He then says he wants to come back ' when my husband is around' so he can talk to us both!!!!! i say DP is working today but window man can come back to give me a full quote latter in day. He then insists on coming when 'husband' is back from work or at a weekend so husband can have quote!!! I tell sales person that i deal with quotes and DIY stuff and to just deal with me. Its a loose quote im not going to sign on dotted line today! He says it so i can choose what colour handles on doors ect!!!! I tell him im more interested in energy efficiency and cost and that i dont want him to come when DP is back from work as this impacts family time.
Then when he takes my details and asks for my title - i say ms , he says mrs and then miss and i correct no ms.

How can a salesman be so out of tune with the times? he wasn't an older sales person either!!!!

He said someone would phone me for feedback after, AIBU to bring up that i felt he had a sexist attitude? how do i phrase it constructively

OP posts:
KeepingItUnderTheRadar · 04/04/2024 11:58

Standard in window sales. For anyone that's worked in that sort of environment they'll know that it's for very good reason, to avoid wasting your time 🤷‍♀️

yogpot · 04/04/2024 11:58

Sales tactic, as above. But the ‘choose the colour’ crap is misogynistic. And it means he uses high pressure tactics. I would just not purchase from them. You could complain to head office, but he’s probably using their script anyway so they won’t care. Fucking annoying though!

Original poster
Sailawaygirl · 04/04/2024 11:57

Revelatio · 04/04/2024 11:54

It because people often deflect and say, ‘oh I can’t sign as I need to talk to my partner’. They are trained to do this, my friend did it at uni to earn some extra cash (soon quit). They are told to do the same if speaking to a man and their partner isn’t there. It’s so they don’t waste the hard sell.

i did wonder this? but it just came across so much like ' dont you need your husbands permission'
also I arranged a new kitchen a few years ago and none of the big kitchen companies asked for my husband to be there!!! even when I set up the finance deal so ????

OP posts:
Nightblindness · 04/04/2024 11:56

Well, it might be because he wants to talk to both home owners as he has to ensure that both are in agreement about the work. Maybe there have been instances of one half of a couple claiming they won't pay for the work as they did not personally agree to it initially?

But yeah, I'm just clutching at straws. If you want to complain, say it like it is. No need to frame it constructively imo.

Mazuslongtoenail · 04/04/2024 11:55

It’s a hectic to reduce your ability to say no because they‘ve removed one of the obvious delaying tactics.

So as well as being a sexist knob, he’s a high pressure salesman. Double reason to tell him to do one.

Revelatio · 04/04/2024 11:54

It because people often deflect and say, ‘oh I can’t sign as I need to talk to my partner’. They are trained to do this, my friend did it at uni to earn some extra cash (soon quit). They are told to do the same if speaking to a man and their partner isn’t there. It’s so they don’t waste the hard sell.

Shinyeyes · 04/04/2024 11:53

"I don't do business with misogynists. Goodbye"