What to say to sexist salesman asking for my 'husband' to be present for quote? Should i say something?

I understand that they may have a policy of not wasting time when there are joint homeowners/decision makers. However it is shocking that he used the default “husband” to ask you if anyone else was a decision-maker, and also the assumption that a married woman would be called “Mrs”.
How can someone who deals with the public be so old-fashioned?

I’d have been tempted to say “No, I don’t have a husband but I am one-third of a throuple, let me find a time when Katie and Mike are both available..”

I do think as pp said it could be trying not to waste time. Having both homeowners present to agree on what they want and pricing seems reasonable. Avoids "No I'm not paying for this I wasn't consulted and did not agree to it." Could be he has prior issues. I had a driving instructor(ages ago)that would only deal with df and allow me to drive with him if df was there. Turns out he had prior accusations from a female student about misconduct so he made sure to not be alone with any women after that. Could be he was a stoneage asshole.

"I am the decision maker. So you either give me the quote or you don't bother and I will take my custom elsewhere".

TBH these days its actually less about sexism and wanting to make sure they don't waste their time quoting to you and then having to come back again to speak to the spouse.

It's a high pressure sales technique as old as the hills. Don't let them over your doorstep. Do your research and find another company.

Some years ago a window company refused to come and quote unless my husband was also
there. He worked away at the time and there was no way we were going to give up family time for a window quote so we refused to allow him to quote.

it was probably one of those companies that start at a hugely high price then end up super cheap.

Just shut the door. Anyone asking this question is (i) demonstrating obvious sexism - as a man, I've never had a similar thing said to me - and (ii) in the business of pressure selling and getting signatures on a contract before they leave your home.

The only reason he needs both partners there is so that he can get commitment before he leaves - a sure sign that the company he works for isn't confident anyone would choose them if they had time to compare quotes and read reviews!

We‘ve been getting quotes on work on house and we had a salesman do this to my husband. As an independent contractor came round the following week to quote for same and husband wasn’t available, he was happy to just talk to me. We‘d heard a lot of good things about 2nd quoter, including his integrity, and he‘s getting the job.

The handles thing is sexist, though, and I think the company need to be aware what image they are projecting to their potential customers.

It may be standard but that does not make it right.

@Shinyeyes has the simple response.

My dad owned a window firm. I spent my summers from 13 doing admin for them and then from 16 going out doing solo quotes. I disagree with the pp who said salespeople will do the same with men too...I didn't.

This is my experience. If you got a man who answered the door, more often than not it didn't make any difference if the wife was there. You went through the quote, he (or they) made the decisions. Conversion rate pretty steady at expected levels, whether it was just Mr or both there.

If Miss or Mrs X opened the door, they were alone and you went through the quote, you very often didn't even get to the end of it. Lots of dithering, lots of 'I'm really not sure if Steve would want the white or not' and 'oh gosh, Mike has said something about the French doors, I really don't know which he had in mind'.

IF you even got to the end of the quote process, the conversion rate was through the floor with women. They hardly ever made any decision or purchases without running it by Mr.

The amount of hours I totally wasted was huge. Lots of unnecessary repeat appointments, returns, abandoned quotes half way. It didn't take long for me to catch on and work out how to avoid wasting my time.

Definitely provide feedback to his manager. Sexist behaviour doesn’t sell well…

If I am instructed by a couple I insist on seeing both.

How do you get to 'insist' on anything though? If I'm paying for goods or services, frankly I'm not interested in being told what to do by the person to whom I'm paying my money.

Obviously it's different if it's a legal thing, where both partners are signing an agreement, like with a mortgage or something.

Complain to head office, I do every single time I am dealt this shit. Latest Halifax bank, result £40 for my "hurt feelings" in addressing letters for a joint account to only DH, one before Nationwide, £150 for their data breach due to sending my credit card to DS.

Twats like this deserve no business, it's 2024 not 1924 FFS.

Been through this (with SRN). Be prepared for a hard sell and push for the finance deal (they need both signatures). 1hr sales pitch will turn to 2-3hours.

Say no and shut the door!!

Don't tell me, company begins with a D and sounds like a bad/cheesy house name for a retiree?

They did this to me. After cold calling my house. Impossible for my other half to be there during their working hours, so it was a case of only meet with me or don't meet at all. As it was a potential big order, they relented.

Ended up giving us a poorly detailed quote, which wasn't competitive. Went with a local company, who were excellent and live my new glazing!

The difference is though that you would have went to them, they aren’t going door to door (wasting time) to give info for you to then say no. Those staff members are at their workplace anyway so it makes no difference to them whether you go alone, then come back with your husband, then come back with your best friend etc, they’re there anyway.

With door to door salesmen they have to specifically come to you to give the info, they aren’t going to bother standing giving you it all for you to then do the “well I need to speak to my husband”- it’s one of the most common tactics for delaying so by waiting to speak to both people it removes that excuse from you basically.

I got my windows from this company I suspect. They never asked my husband but when I joined the quote meeting the sales person said it was good because otherwise he would have felt he was wasting his time as people won't make a decision if both decision makers aren't there. Anyway, I negotiate for a job...we ended up with the regional manager round twice and landed a bargain, so much of a bargain they refused to do a quote for the windows on another property I own. Just remember no one has to say yes to a hard sale and have some fun with it.

I think the correct answer to the original question 'Do you have a husband?' is 'None of your business!' There are all kinds of other expensive things you can buy, or have done to your house, for which women don't seem to be asked to defer to their husbands. What's so damned special about window-sellers? Their whole way of selling their service seems ridiculous and outdated.

It's probably not sexist. He's a salesperson. "I need to discuss it with my partner before we decide" is a common line they hear. He's knocking down barriers before they arise. Very standard practice.

If I am instructed by a couple I insist on seeing both. Seeing one always means explaining it all again to the other one as it’s too much information to relay and they both need to understand and make decisions. Hope I’m not seen as sexist.

1* review on google / Trustpilot pointing out the misogyny of their salesman.

TBF I am amazed people are still buying stuff like this door-to-door, given the huge investment it would be to replace your windows

I phoned the dentist to make an appointment for my daughter recently and the guy who answered the phone booked her in and then said 'can you make sure you let daughter's father's name know as he usually brings her'.

There have been threads about a certain window company doing this before. It’s archaic and I would refuse to deal with them.