10 year old alone after school?

But you are considering leaving a vunerable child alone? Strange priorities

Are you claiming benefits as you can claim childcare back, i dint see you have much choice as they are too young to be left alone, or find a babysitter

Is there an after school wrap around care or clubs they could go to? Any friends of hers at school who may be happy to have her at theirs after school and you can pay them back by helping them out other times by babysitting or days out in the school hols? If not then I’d look for a childminder who does pick ups from school or a secondary school pupil who perhaps lives locally and would be happy to earn a bit of cash collecting and staying until you get home. Maybe ask on a local Facebook page

After school club. Or childminders do after school care

As a childminder I am horrified that a cm in a small village is charging £16 per hour! £5-6 is the average here. If I knew a cm was rinsing parents like that for afterschool care I’d be appalled. I do after school until 530 for £12 with a hot dinner. It sounds a very hard situation. Do you have any neighbours who would keep an eye on your child? Could they catch a bus to your workplace and wait?

Bloody hell, calm down Esther Rantzen

We aren't talking about young children though, we are talking about older children. Mine was happy to be home for a couple of hours, he read, did any homework or played on the PC with a friend. He was allowed a friend from our street over from age 10.

And SS would completely ignore your "concerns".

My daughter is the same age as yours - year 5 but 11 in September. We are trying her at home alone on Tuesday after school for the first time.

My oldest is in Year 5 and about half of his classmates walk home alone and let themselves in and wait for a parent to get home.

We’re in London if that makes a difference (so as per most towns, no country roads to navigate and lots of immediate neighbours/shops etc if help was needed).

Depends on your child...it's potentially a year too young but every child is different...only you know if your child can do it...can child call you or 999 in case of a problem

Only problem I’d have with it (assuming child is happy too) is that it is every day and possibly a bit boring for them but if there’s no after school clubs then needs must. We started leaving DS home alone for brief periods from about 11 to build independence before high school. We have a ring camera and I can call him on iPad to check in. It would be a disservice to him otherwise imo. Common for most children to start walking home alone here at about 8 and almost all NT children would be by end of P4 (think that’s Y3 in England?) - UK, large village for context.

I think it's absolutely fine as long as you and her are both confident about it. It doesn't sound like you are though so you have a couple of months to work on that. In our area kids walk to school from 9 when they start middle school. My child was nine recently so we are already practising talking about scenarios, leaving him at home for short periods, making sure he knows our phone numbers and who he can trust etc. You guys have got this! Two hours isn't so long and presumably she can stop and run some errands en route etc. so it's not as daunting.

Are there any after school clubs? Does the school run a breakfast club? The latter is usually inexpensive. Could you change your hours to start work earlier and finish earlier and bridge the gap that way?

It's fine op. If your kid is responsible and knows to lock the door behind them and not answer it then it's fine.

Ds is 13 soon and has additional needs. At 10 he had a key to the house and got himself to and from school either alone or meeting friends each morning. I was around in the morning before he left but wouldn't get in until 4pm so he was alone for 45 minutes 4 days a week.

His friend at 10 was alone in the house from 8am, had to make his own lunch each morning and get himself to school.

My son's been doing this one day a week since he was 10. He's quite an anxious child but he's fine with it. Any problems and I call an Uber and be home in ten mins (but there has never been a problem)

In my primary school, if we knew that a child was being left alone for 2 hours every night after school we would be concerned.
You mention not being able to leave a vulnerable adult alone - I assume that’s your job? But neither should you leave a vulnerable child alone for that length of time. You also say ‘we’. Again I assume there is a DP/H around that can also contribute to childcare costs?

My year 5 child has walked herself home since the start of y5 when she was 9 and let herself in and looked after herself until 5.30pm 3 days a week. More recently 5 days a week as I’ve had to work additional hours. She even sorts her own dinner, usually warming something I’ve made up in the microwave.
It’s no different to what I did as a child from y5 you were on your own taking yourself to and from school, latchkey kids and the dangers have not changed. We just mollycoddle kids more these days.
As long as he has means of contacting you should he need to it’s fine and doesn’t sound like you have an alternative

Well, he plays outside in the grove with his friends , he’s just not ever really been on any kind of journey alone or left the grove . It’s not really been a conscious choice - we live quite far from the local shop , he would have to cross 2 roads ( admittedly it’s a quiet area ) , but he’s never asked and there has just never really been a need . He has no additional needs and I guess you are right , I probably should start encouraging him a bit more .

“fending for themselves “ ? She’s considered her 10 year child being alone for a 1-1.5 hours, in a safe warm house which I’m sure has food in, during the day . She’s not asked if it’s ok to dump him in the middle of a forest , with a hunting knife to find his own dinner !!!

Just reminded me of my DD's scout camp when she was 10. The children were 'dumped' in the middle of a forest (in groups of 3) with a map and a compass and told to find their way to the campsite, in the pouring rain. No adults with them (they had their phones with them with whatsapp location sharing to the adults, but turned out reception wasn't that great in the forest) and they had to cook their dinner (though not hunt it!) over camping stoves (which DD said was the best bit).

Pay a teenager to be a "buddy sitter" for a couple of hours after school every day.

Are there any other families in the area who you could come to some sort of shared arrangement with? Whether sharing a babysitter or actually remunerating in some way DS friends’ families to have him regularly?

second suggestion - possibly a no goer but it sounds like maybe you are a carer? Could DS get to your place of work and watch TV or do homework somewhere quietly in the persons house where you work? Is it worth asking?

Then could you come to some kind of termtime timetable - he goes to one friends house Mondays, another friends house Tuesdays, to your place of work weds, your partner deals with Thursdays, pay childminder just one day? Or something??

have you checked Koru kids as they match families to babysitters for regular after school care - patchy coverage though and also can be £££

good luck

@LanaL It's quite extreme for a 10-year-old never to have been outside alone. Does he have additional needs? If he's starting high school next year you really should work on getting him some independence.

What an extremely useful , informative and well thought out reply . Not based on opinion but based on facts and well informed . I think this is exactly the type of response the OP needs to help her make an informed decision , rather than judgement , accusations of neglect and opinions .

It also concerns me on this thread at how quickly people throw the word neglect around . It makes me wonder if people are blinded to the actual , real neglect that some children suffer .

“fending for themselves “ ? She’s considered her 10 year child being alone for a 1-1.5 hours, in a safe warm house which I’m sure has food in, during the day . She’s not asked if it’s ok to dump him in the middle of a forest , with a hunting knife to find his own dinner !!!

These are not all options that all parents have . Not all schools have childminders that serve them. Not all schools have after school clubs . Not all workplaces offer flexible hours or working from home ( eg teachers - absolutely no way to change your hours or work from home , that’s just one ) .

It is absolutely not neglect . I think many children of this age probably do this . It’s all dependant on circumstances . Guidance by NSPCC says that “children under 12 are rarely able to be left alone for long periods of time “ - it doesn’t say it’s neglect and it doesn’t say ‘never’ and it doesn’t specify what a long period of time is . Because it is all dependent on many circumstances. There are children that are too young to be able to be alone safely at all that are left alone , that are not fed , that don’t have their basic needs met and this is neglect - neglect is a strong word and I don’t think this situation calls for it at all .

Schools are happy to let children leave alone in y5 . They are 9 when they start year 5 . I’m not saying 9 is ok , but that is what happens .