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Original poster

Ok to leave a 16 year old?

115 replies

IncognitoUsername · 03/04/2024 11:27

I know that this will provoke a variety of responses but just wanted to get a selection of ideas
Is it ok to leave a 16 year old home alone for four days/three nights? DH and I have the opportunity to go to a wedding- in this country but few hours drive away. Midweek and DS has college. We are involved in the wedding (complicated) so would be away for the above time. We have a fab neighbour who would be on call for any domestic dramas, he can have tea with his best mate every night (we did same over Easter for the friend) and my best friend lives two minutes away and would check on him every day. At the moment we have 3 options - we all go and he misses college, one of us goes and the other stays with him, or no-one goes.
DH says he’s old enough and very sensible but my mum heart says he’s still my little boy! What would you do?

OP posts:
Original poster
IncognitoUsername · 03/04/2024 11:37

fieldsofbutterflies · 03/04/2024 11:33

Of course, it's absolutely fine. I'd be more concerned if an NT 16 year old couldn't cope with that level of responsibility, to be honest.

Well he’s not NT but neither am I. Both have ADHD, which is probably why I made this post to be honest. Manifests as overthinking rather than an inability to actually deal with things.

OP posts:
KalaMush · 03/04/2024 11:37

I have teens and I think this is fine, maybe with someone popping in to check all is ok.

Hermittrismegistus · 03/04/2024 11:36

Of course it fine.

MolkosTeenageAngst · 03/04/2024 11:35

Absolutely fine, my parents went away for a week when I was that age.

IDontLoveTheWayYouLie · 03/04/2024 11:35

It's fine

MasterBeth · 03/04/2024 11:34

All fine.

Original poster
IncognitoUsername · 03/04/2024 11:34

GoofyGoldie · 03/04/2024 11:32

Well, when I was 16 I had my own flat & a baby!

It sounds like he has a lot of support, so if he's happy with it, I think you'd be OK leaving him.

We leave our 15 & 17yr olds to have a weekend away occasionally. Although my 35 Yr old son does pop in & usually spends the evening with them.

Best mate has said she would spend an evening with him but he’s not so keen! He’ll be online most of the time I guess.

OP posts:
fieldsofbutterflies · 03/04/2024 11:33

Of course, it's absolutely fine. I'd be more concerned if an NT 16 year old couldn't cope with that level of responsibility, to be honest.

Original poster
IncognitoUsername · 03/04/2024 11:33

FrenchandSaunders · 03/04/2024 11:29

If he's sensible I would do it. Is he likely to throw a party or let other friends know he's home alone which can get out of hand.

Totally depends on the teen ... one of mine I would have left at that age, and younger, she would have had a mate round, done some baking, chilled out, gone to school. My other, no way, she'd would not have got up and gone to school and would have had endless parties.

He’s very sensible - totally not the party type. We will obviously text all the time and college would let us know if he’s not been in.

OP posts:
GoofyGoldie · 03/04/2024 11:32

Well, when I was 16 I had my own flat & a baby!

It sounds like he has a lot of support, so if he's happy with it, I think you'd be OK leaving him.

We leave our 15 & 17yr olds to have a weekend away occasionally. Although my 35 Yr old son does pop in & usually spends the evening with them.

Dontwanttobefatanymore · 03/04/2024 11:32

With you saying college as opposed to school I assume nearly 17? If so I’d say yes as long as they were sensible. If only just 16 then not for that long

Icannoteven · 03/04/2024 11:31

It’s fine. In the 90’s, when I was a teenager, you could leave school, get a job and move out at 16. 16 is not an infant.

InTheShallowTheShalalalalalalalow · 03/04/2024 11:30

I wouldn't think twice about it tbh. I have faith in the way I have raised my teens, and I was living by myself at 16 too.

FrenchandSaunders · 03/04/2024 11:29

If he's sensible I would do it. Is he likely to throw a party or let other friends know he's home alone which can get out of hand.

Totally depends on the teen ... one of mine I would have left at that age, and younger, she would have had a mate round, done some baking, chilled out, gone to school. My other, no way, she'd would not have got up and gone to school and would have had endless parties.

CarrotCake01 · 03/04/2024 11:28

I probably wouldn't leave a 16 year old that long, no