Ok to leave a 16 year old?

I’m a bit shocked at some of the replies on here… when I was this age I was going on holiday with my girlfriends to Greece…nights out, staying over at each others houses. Maybe it depends on the persons character! I suppose being in a group is different to being ‘alone’. What are your neighbours like? Anyone that can come and stay but not ‘babysit’??

Of course it is. 16 year olds can live alone.

Then I come full circle back to it's all about the individual, you need to trust your own judgement.

It's not very long since you could marry at 16!!

I would ignore your Mum and go by your instincts and knowledge of your son.

I can only go by my own experience of this happening when ds2 was 16. We’d booked a family holiday in Devon, but there was a gathering which clashed, and he particularly wanted to attend, so we agreed he’d make his own way and join us a couple of days after the party. I’m sure I worried at the time, about him spending 3 nights alone, the party, getting back from the party, securing the house, him catching the right trains (involved two changes), but he was (is!) sensible when it comes to important things, plus we were in phone contact for reminders, and know the neighbours well, who would have contacted us if anything was amiss. It all went like clockwork. He survived, so did the house!

Exactly this. In fact I'd feel deeply ashamed of myself if my kids at 16 were unable to look after themselves for a few days. It's only feeding themselves and getting to college. Not working long shifts to pay bills and doing diy on top

I left my daughter overnight but I think that's too long sorry.

I was at parties like this at that age 😂 my friends certainly shouldn't have been trusted!

I would have been a bit clueless but trustworthy however. I suppose it depends on the child and who else is around!

I think that it is fine. My eldest two girls would have wanted a mate to stay. Like a pp I left home at 16. However, the middle of the night, with only your own judgement to get you by, can feel very different to how you thought. Could you do an overnight stay to test things out? This could be the start of a new found freedom.

I wouldn't, but I was left a lot at similar age and that has influenced my view.

The ADHD also makes a difference IMO.

I was left for weekends several times a year at 16. I also have ADHD - I just needed a text reminder to lock the door in the evening.

As long as he feels comfortable that he can manage I wouldn't worry about it. He has lots of people he can turn to if he has any problems and worst case is he just ends up going to stay with a friend.

I left mine for four nights. His GF stayed at home with him and his GPs were ten minutes away. No problem.

At 16, they can leave for college and fend for themselves. They need to learn independence.

Yea absolutely I would

That probably should have been included in your OP, tbh.

But even with the ADHD, I think the set-up sounds fine. He has plenty of people looking out for him and college will contact you if he's bunking off.

This is a trust-your-gut type situation I think. If you know him to be able to handle himself and he’s got a lot of support for if he gets into trouble, then enjoy the wedding!

As long as he is not a total dingbat and/or likely to have a massive out of control party - then he will be fine.
Basics to know that he might not -
How to turn off the gas/water in an emergency.
That's about it really.

So with the ADHD (which IMO is very relevant) I'd be erring on the side of overthinking myself. Make sure he knows what to do in emergencies, how is he going to remember to lock up and turn the oven off, etc etc.

Sounds like you have great back up in place for him, but responsibility should be on him to manage this stuff if he's up to being left.

Yes I would. Though when we left my 16 year old stepson for a week he did have an unauthorised party which caused at least £4k worth of damage - broken window, slashed painting, neighbour's car windscreen, broke my son's cot... (word got out on SM and loads showed up). But if you trust yours then the age itself is fine.

Yes fine. I left my very sensible 16 year old alone for 3 nights last weekend. She is not the party type. I phoned her each morning and evening. A friend popped in every day just to say hello and she had the dogs. She actually loved it! No little brother and no mum telling her to wash up. I came back to a clean house

Personally I wouldn’t but it’s very dependent on the child. DD was a really sensible and mature 16 year old, I would’ve been fine to leave her except she definitely wouldn’t have wanted to be left on her own for that amount of time, it’s different if siblings/friends are around though

It all depends on the individual at that age. You know him, you need to rely your own judgement on this one.

Mine would be fine, as in he wouldn’t do anything stupid, but he would be sad…