To say no to unwanted visitors?

Bloody hell! You are offering a fully inclusive holiday bed board and trips? I am not surprised they want to come back, they’ve got your number in more ways than one.

say no

I just feel like there must be some omissions. How do you end up paying for all meals and entertainment and the other family not offer to pay their share? Did you or your husband say 'We'll take you to this restaurant tonight. Our treat!" ... or was nothing said and then when the bill came you just paid it all?

Same with the museum trips, when you're in the queue surely you just pay for your own family.

Did they think you're exceedingly rich and want to treat them? It doesn't make sense.

No wonder they have asked to come again - sounds like they had a free all inclusive holiday staying with you!
I would just say you have lots of plans this summer and it won’t be possible. Otherwise your house will become their annual cheap holiday destination!

Agree. Why on earth did you do this to begin with?! If you have guests for several days it’s absolutely fine to cook at home most nights. Or to say “we are eating at home this evening, you are welcome to join us, but if you’d prefer to make your own arrangements and go out, that’s absolutely fine.”

Same for entertaining them and taking them on day trips every day as if they are toddlers. Yes, one or two days out is fine. But it’s also fine to say “we’ll just be relaxing at home today/working/getting on with some chores, feel free to chill out here but if you’d like to go out for the day, I can recommend x y and z local attractions.”

Sorry OP but you’re an absolute mug for doing all of that.

Wow who does this!! I’d just say no sorry it doesn’t work for us!

They invited themselves! Of course you can say no. Even if they were good friends who you love dearly rather than CF acquaintances, you can still say no because they invited themselves.

These things do not work. Not stays for more than a day/night. Unless reciprocated. So if they live somewhere you want to go, it can work. Not if you are the host and payer all the time!

I have a holiday home and couldn’t believe the amount of friends/acquaintances that wanted to stay there, dropped it in to conversation how they want to visit that part of the world. No way, if they have a home I can stay in, maybe I would consider it, otherwise why should I.

@SammyTheDog did you not say something? Why did you keep paying?

How about buying a chap doormat just for the occasion?
EG, doormat reads in cap letters, "U R NOT WELCOME"

OR

"OH NOT U AGAIN" - This one is a bit more polite but one of my clients had it for their neigbour, showed it to me

😂

Did they ever invite you back?
How the hell did you get through five days without asking them for a contribution?
If you want to be polite, a "we're busy' would do it.
They must have been cackling and rubbing their hands with glee at their fortune last year.

@JMSA exactly.

We booked a holiday cottage and invited our friends to stay. They stayed 3 days. No skin of our noses as we were going anyway.

They brought not just a bottle, but a case of wine, cheese and crackers and the makings of a breakfast. And we split the restaurant bills equally.

You know, like decent human beings.

@AhNowTed

You're probably right. I mean, on what planet would you turn up empty-handed to your hosts' home ... and then pay for nowt all week?!

Users like this don't change.

They've probably burned their way through other friendships.

The OP is just the latest pushover.

They'll just move on to the next.

Ok, so it depends. If you're not bothered about seeing them again, then obviously it's a no.
If you'd like to see them again IF they changed their ways, then reply with 'sure, but we'd expect you to contribute this time'.
You have nothing to lose at this point by being brutally honest about your expectations.

I'm inclined to agree. Why the hell did you keep paying?!!

I can't believe you gave them to opportunity to fleece you last time!
No wonder they want to come back
Reply bluntly using as few words as possible
They have the hide of a rhino.. and tbh you hardly know them
If you're too polite to tell them to piss off then " No, that won't work for us( this time or ever again)

Hang on. Likely she was offering. Yes absolutely they should have paid their way but she does bear some responsibility. She should have used her words.

and she seems to be indicating in her op that if they’d brought a small gift or paid for one meal she’d be ok with it. I mean who does that. Pays for everything for a week like that.

Generosity and awkwardness is not the green light for fuckers like this to take advantage.

She should never have been put in that position.

Honestly, I feel you were at fault not to say anything at the time! Why behave like such a mug? It's fine to say no you can't have them to stay this summer. You need to work on being more assertive!

Does it matter if you are honest?
These people can do literally nothing to you. 🤷

I really don't want to. I didn't enjoy it last time and it cost us a fortune to entertain you. I felt taken advantage of tbh.

I wonder whether this is the civil servant in the Karma thread who's now spent all his money on his meal and now wants a free holiday to make up for it.

Were you saying "Oh no, don't worry" if they offered to pay, expecting to have a bit of a fight and then you'd let them pay, or did they not offer at all?

I'm trying to imagine going into a museum and them expecting you to pay - that's just weird.

Agree 💯 % !
I read things like this on here occasionally & wonder wtf?!?

F off should do it....

I wouldn’t give an explanation like this or phrase it with any kind of apology @SammyTheDog. I’d just say, “The doesn’t work for us this year. Have a lovely time wherever you end up going”. Then don’t budge or respond in an apologetic way if they push. Don’t offer an explanation as to why it doesn’t work for you. Repeat next year if necessary but they will probably be milking someone else’s hospitality by then.