My aunts inheritance choices seem to have destroyed my family

Whats going on with all the 'a 24 year old should have the money in trust'

Is this Victorian times or something. Girls with their silly little heads shouldnt hav so much money

Neither your aunt nor your DD are at fault here. Your aunt was free to do as she pleased with her money. Your children don't owe you or their siblings anything. I expect your DD is currently NC with you because of what you and other family said to her at Easter. I'm afraid I don't blame her. You should be happy that your DD is living her best life imo.

Still more than they were entitled to, when what they were entitled to was £0. They should be thanking her, not bitching because they want more.

You and your family are being VVU. Your DD and aunt obviously got on well (similar personalities?), better than aunt did with the rest of you, and your expectations and behaviour over this will ruin your relationship with her. Give your head a wobble and apologise for not appreciating what your DD has already given you. I feel sorry for your DD who has tried to do right by her ungrateful family and is having it thrown back at hr yhrough sheer envy.

Your daughter sounds nice, and level-headed. I'm glad the money went to a good home.

50K is a good sum of money towards a deposit though - and even better if left in a high interest account for a few years.
You can't really blame her for not giving more away. If she was already living and working in London then she took the opportunity to buy there which would be difficult otherwise.
I can't see what the point of a will is if it isn't to express one's wishes after death, whether or not that's what other people are happy with.

And why do you think you are owed anything.

It might be measly in your opinion but I'd snatch someones hands off if offered me that.

She'd be better off in that case sharing it with her friends, surely?

Why should it go to people she doesn't like?

This.

I'm childless, but DH had kids from his first marriage.

DH died during lockdown. One child was shielding and couldn't come to the funeral (but later went to another one close to his home - fair enough). Another child said that they couldn't come because of adult-onset asthma. Okay. Fair enough, I guess.

Then they told me that they didn't want the 20 yr old grandchild to come to the funeral because it might upset them.

I followed the hearse on my own.

There's a lot more to it, but I snapped a couple of months after the funeral. The kids and grandchild have gone NC but took their inheritance. DH hadn't updated his will, but told me what to give the grandchild, so I sent a cheque for that amount.

They were quick enough to cash the cheques that I sent for a wedding and a graduation.

I don't feel inclined leave them anything in my will.

Well they were welcome to refuse that amount if not happy.

Did they no I don't think so.

But £50k is a very small sum in relation to the main capital sum, therefore measly.

I too would have concerns about a twenty four year old inheriting that amount. For that reason alone I'd have strongly encouraged her to share much more equally between the four cousins.

The amount? Whats the amount, Im going blind

So you named your daughter after your childless rich aunt and sent her off for weeks at a time to spend holidays with her?

Sounds like you were trying to get into her good graces and it misfired when the aunt left her money to your daughter instead of you

50 k in the context of 2 mil is a
small amount.

If you consider 50 k measly sort your shit out.

This .. what Jelly said!

You ungrateful bunch!
How dare you treat her like that and hold contempt for her after how much she gave you!
If you're going to behave like that you better give her back every penny she gave you.

My brother split an inheritance exactly three ways between himself, myself and my sister. To the penny. It was significantly in excess of £300k and we only knew of it because he chose to tell us.

You don’t have to do what your solicitor advises. 🤷‍♀️

I'm guessing one of the reasons her aunt left it to her is that she knows how difficult it is to afford anything in London. But, working in finance, this is where dd has to live. Makes perfect sense to me.

Your daughter sounds lovely. Making time to be with her great aunt all her life, spending time and forming a lovely bond. She gave away £300,000 to the rest of the family which she didn’t have to at all, and the rest of you jackals still aren’t happy?

The rest of the family sound far less lovely. Why is no one satisfied with the incredibly generous £50k each? What did you all expect to happen? Were you guys rubbing your hands at the thought of the money you expected to inherit (did you think it would be half each for you and your brother?) and now shocked that you didn’t get that?

And I’m sorry but the great nephews could have made the effort if they wanted. Your description of your Dd as “girly and sweet” is contemptuous in the extreme. Boys can make an effort to do things they don’t absolutely love. “She just happened to like the same things” - or they had a lot in common - that’s a perfectly good reason for a closer bond. What were these boys expecting- to make no effort with their aunt but be treated the same as the niece who did?

Absolutely why should you be obligated to give money to anyone you don't like.

There is people in any family people wouldn't give a penny too, wills aren't a Democracy leave it to who you want to leave to.

Don't expect anything and be surprised if you get something.

I'd be frustrated too but at the end of the day .... its her money. She didn't HAVE to give ANY away! If the aunt wanted her money split between the family, that's what she would have requested in her Will.

I'd be concerned if my daughter was changing too much as a person and losing her personailty due to greed, and making stupid financial decisions that were going to bite her in the ass before long but I don't think you can be too mad at her spending her own money, just because you want it.

Why? You love your children equally and as their mother you would expect to treat them equally yourself, i understand that.

But that obligation does not exist between siblings and, reasonably often, there is not even any love or liking between siblings. Trying to guilt one of them into giving the other money so that you feel better that your children are equally financially provided for is misguided and ultimately self-serving.

Someone else did the sums earlier -
She had 1.9 million. She has given away 275k, she has bought a flat in either Kensington or Bayswater for over a million, so let us say 1.3 million, which is a typical price for a one bed in those areas. That means she has probably spent something like 1.55 million and now has £350,000 left.

So basically she's brought fairly modest property that needs some work in an area where she wants to live. It happens to be an area where property prices are high.

She's had some fun as instructed by her aunt.

So the bulk of her spend was simply on buying a home mortgage free. She's got a bit of a nest egg left. Seems perfectly reasonable to me. I guess her greedy rellies would have been happy for her to be left unable to afford a property in London.

The question was is it unreasonable to think this has damaged the fam - no, it isn't unreasonable.

Regardless of the morality of this,it will cause problems in pretty much any family.