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Original poster

I hate our holiday and want to go home

841 replies

Backwoods57 · 30/03/2024 11:10

I need to rant.

Day 10 of a 13 day visit to the UK. We moved to the USA in 2014 and have to come back every year because MIL can't afford to visit us, and is scared of flying. We are in Aldershot/Farnham area. There is nothing to do apart from walk up and down dead high streets. Traffic is terrible, I smell the pollution and cigarette smoke everywhere.

If we don't come we get a massive guilt trip about MIL not seeing grandkids etc.

This trip cost $4000, we have done very little apart from visit family and sit in my SiL's cramped dirty messy house.

2 weeks of my 3 week vacation allowance has been thrown away. I have start working remotely for A. Something to do, and B so I can claim some vacation days back.

I miss my home, our dogs, I miss countryside and wildlife, I want my space back.....and tap water that doesn't taste like bleach.

OP posts:
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Desecratedcoconut · 30/03/2024 12:45

Sarahconnor1 · 30/03/2024 12:13

I would love to hear the SILs side to this story

Right? I wonder how she feels about having to play host and driver to a miserable family who throws a disgruntled eye over her housekeeping and complains about the quality of the water? Poor woman, I bet she is counting the hours.

Jimjamjaroo · 30/03/2024 12:45

Yeah, for the future OP, sounds like you need to organise an itinerary for yourself and make the family visit bit a PART of it, rather than the focus. I personally would hate to have family come a stay for a solid block, dependent on me to entertain and drive everywhere! Just talk it over with everyone, in a what worked/what didn't work kind of way.

BWSS · 30/03/2024 12:45

Townhallbride · 30/03/2024 12:44

You're a stones throw from the new forest, one of the most beautiful places in the UK. get a hire car and go explore the great outdoors.

Just don’t touch the donkeys or ponies!

MooseAndSquirrelLoveFlannel · 30/03/2024 12:45

There is tonnes of stuff to do in the UK, outdoors, indoors, historical sites alone are incredible.

You need to plan your time better, book train tickets and get out there!

crackofdoom · 30/03/2024 12:44

There's no point trying to emulate a hunting, shooting backwoods type of holiday in the South East of England. Not to say that there aren't amazing landscapes- Salisbury Plain, the South Downs, but they reflect thousands of years of human activity. You might as well fully immerse yourself in the city experience and go to London. Or visit the kind of historical sites that you can't find in the US. Or go to the coast, if you don't live near the sea.

Townhallbride · 30/03/2024 12:44

You're a stones throw from the new forest, one of the most beautiful places in the UK. get a hire car and go explore the great outdoors.

Setyoufree · 30/03/2024 12:41

Next time get MIL to meet you somewhere train distance from her house. Don't use up 2/3 of your holiday in Aldershot 😱

LittleBearPad · 30/03/2024 12:40

pickytube · 30/03/2024 12:39

The problem is she has 2 days left in the UK and she can write this holiday off as there's no way to save it but what is she going to do next year and the year after? This surely can't go on forever, there needs to be some compromise from the mil too jumping on a plane or meeting half way.

Of course there’s a way to save it if they get off their butts and do something!

LittleBearPad · 30/03/2024 12:40

Nevermindtheteacaps · 30/03/2024 12:37

@LittleBearPad

I know, but the suggestion was to go jump on it, as OP HAS NOT booked in advance

True.

Though what would OP do in Paris. She seems unable to do anything off her own bat.

pickytube · 30/03/2024 12:39

The problem is she has 2 days left in the UK and she can write this holiday off as there's no way to save it but what is she going to do next year and the year after? This surely can't go on forever, there needs to be some compromise from the mil too jumping on a plane or meeting half way.

Movinghouseatlast · 30/03/2024 12:38

T there are loads of nice places near Farnham. The Surrey Hills, Box Hill, Dorking are all reachable on the train. Get off at Dorking Deepdene and you can walk to any of them, there is a vineyard near there too.

You could get the train to Reading and from there it's not too long a journey to Bath.

Nevermindtheteacaps · 30/03/2024 12:37

@LittleBearPad

I know, but the suggestion was to go jump on it, as OP HAS NOT booked in advance

EscapeTheCastle · 30/03/2024 12:35

I actually have a reoccurring nightmare like this. I arrive somewhere really wonderful but I haven't planned it properly and I'm stuck in one place or end up wondering around confused regretting not planning the trip effectively.

Jimjamjaroo · 30/03/2024 12:34

The weather has been particularly shit, to be fair!

Agree with pp train to London for a day.

LittleBearPad · 30/03/2024 12:33

Nevermindtheteacaps · 30/03/2024 12:31

'Jump on the Eurostar'

That costs well over a thousand pounds for a family 😂

Show quote history

No it doesn’t. Not if you book in advance.

RainStreakedWindows · 30/03/2024 12:32

Oh dear. When I read your preferred type of holiday I am not sure how you ever thought a holiday in Aldershot in the rain with no money would be fun.

Meet your MIL in Scotland next time and do all the things you enjoy there.

GoldenSpraint · 30/03/2024 12:32

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This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Pinkdelight3 · 30/03/2024 12:31

Your MIL won't fly. Your DH doesn't want to manage the DC on his own. Neither of these are your problems to solve. If DH wants to visit, he can manage it. No reason you and, tbh mostly your SIL have to shoulder the aggro.

Nevermindtheteacaps · 30/03/2024 12:31

Ginmonkeyagain · 30/03/2024 11:27

Get the train to London and jump on the Eurostar. You'll be in Paris in under 3 hours

'Jump on the Eurostar'

That costs well over a thousand pounds for a family 😂

Didimum · 30/03/2024 12:30

Sounds like you’ve planned your trip badly. That’s no one else’s fault but yours.

bumblefeline · 30/03/2024 12:30

I would not visit again and spend that 4k travelling around USA. The UK is a stunning country but to spend it stuck in a grotty house being ferried about is my worse nightmare so I get why you hate your holiday, I wouldn't even call that a holiday to be fair. Either your MIL gets over her fear of flying or combine next years trip with a week on the continent. Don't waste precious annual leave or your life.

LittleBearPad · 30/03/2024 12:30

It’s a beautiful day today OP, I’m not far from you. Go and do something!

Menomeno · 30/03/2024 12:27

Eastre · 30/03/2024 12:21

Ungrateful for weeks of sitting in a smelly little house having the occasional walk up the road? Sounds like an absolute nightmare

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You must have missed “So far we have visited Whipsnade, Woking, Windsor Fleet and Guildford. We can't go anywhere without SiL because she does the driving. We have to be back every day because we have to collect her kids from school.”

Original poster
Backwoods57 · 30/03/2024 12:27

Redtedbed · 30/03/2024 12:06

So if you and your DH go on holiday normally what planning do you do? Or do you just get to your hotel or lodge and sit down and that's it.

We go on holiday to Portugal on Monday - I've already got plans of which days we're doing day trips and which days are resort days. The day trips are booked. The kids activities are booked. We needed a dinner reservation for a really nice restaurant down the road, that's booked. I don't just leave it up to the holiday gods to provide a nice time for me.

We normally do a camping trip, in Maine or Canada, we take the kids and the ATV's and do a 200mile wilderness ride camping on route.

we also have a remote log cabin we go to where we all hunt, shoot, fish, canoe hike etc.

OP posts:
LittleBearPad · 30/03/2024 12:26

Nevermindtheteacaps · 30/03/2024 12:25

He needs to man up. Plenty of women travel with two under 5s without whinge bucketing about it

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Both the OP and her partner need to woman/man up. They’ve been ferried around for the last 10 days like children.