Cheeky Fckers

OP she will move easily to the next mug, and rinse them until they've also had enough.

I wouldn't lose sleep over it.

She's a master user.

No - you aren't babysitting ( that us in the childs home except some circumstances that make it essential for them to be in your house after 6pm)

You really cannot go charging for favours done months back . Unless you stated at the time that you were to be paid ( which as you are not a Registered Childminder are you ? does not apply )

If I was your CF Friend I'd laugh my socks off .

You need your money for the Club refunded .
I think everything else you'd have a hard time proving .
Cut your losses and cut her out .

You've definitely posted about this before . Big girl pants on and just send the message . You were told last time to ditch this friend. You're still quivering now over sending the message . You've been given loads of ideas on how to send a straight to the point message . You don't deserve to be treated like this , you're obviously a lovely person trying to do the best they can . Get this done and have a lovely Easter weekend .

Hope you have you messaged her.

If not, please do.

Tell her you have no support, a single income. You had an exhausting work trip and you did not like her dropping her child without any consideration to you.
Remind her that last year, you offered her support on X occasions and also paid for her kids with your single income, and have had them when they were sick. But you have now realised that this friendship is one sided, your friend has no consideration to you, so now on you would no longer provide any child care.

Why didn't you say I am not in the city/ country and will arrive very late, won't be in condition to look after?

@thisisasurvivor - I wouldn't use the email as the primary form of communication here. I'd send a few bullet pointed text messages instead. Not all at once but text messages/WhatsApp messages can be very powerful in getting your point across without needing to be too wordy.
I would send her a message saying that you cannot have her kids next week and you'd appreciate her letting you know when she can have yours.
Then a few hours later I'd send a message about the outstanding amount for the summer club that they haven't repaid.
I'd also then a few hours later send a final text saying that you're no longer available to look after her child(ren) and she'll have to find alternative childcare.

Three bullet pointed texts, each with a different message and each stating clearly what you want to happen.

You can always follow up with an email but I'd use texts as the first form of communication.

I wouldn’t bother with an email.

Just text and say ‘I’m checking my accounts from last year and following up on money owed to me, you owe me £40 for the summer camp, can you revolut it to me today thanks’

no need for a big showdown.
Ask her to have your children 2 days next week. Then be quiet.

You just need to say no from now on now and stick to it. Just do it once and you’ll be off!

good luck

This isn't mine but it's good.

Put your coat on before you open the door. If it's someone you're happy to see, you've just got in. Otherwise, you're on your way out so could they please go away.

Failing that, don't open until you know who's there. And invest in heavy nets so no one can peep in. She'll get the message.

No, you don’t have mug all over your face, you are allowing this situation. You should have texted her that you weren’t home from work, had had two long working days and that it wasn’t convenient. If she still had the cheek to turn up, you should have answered the door and told her the same. She’s a CF, but if you don’t want this to happen, stop enabling it, set boundaries and stick to them.

When my future in-laws found out that I was a teacher it was a case of Whoopee, free school holiday child care! I made a point of not being home at the start of the school holidays for about a year and they eventually got the message or, in their terms, that their brother had married a mean cow!

It’s sort of bullying as well, nobody minds helping out in an emergency but she is really taking advantage. The resentment just builds up in this sort of situation and it’s not so easy to be one step ahead of someone like this.

Unless there was a definite Yes then it shouldn't be assumed you can dump off your child if you're a decent, caring mother and not just a grifter.

Then take them straight back home

And block

'I'm working, not childminding. If you drop them off I'll call social services for abandonment of children. In the meantime, you owe £££ for past childminding.'

The plane on the tarmac is neither here nor there. Just this sentence is enough:

I can't look after him tomorrow, you'll need to make other arrangements

I am a lone parent and I can't believe the balls of your CF! I mean seriously how brazen! I really hope you also get your money back.

I like this message. It gives notice and gets the point across. All the people suggesting angry, or argumentative, or rude texts are wrong. If OP hasn't clearly said she is unable to provide any childvare and said no clearly enough then the CF friend is possibly unaware of how much it annoys her.

I hope you get the results you need from this.

I wouldn't say that the OP's response was weird: she simply expected her friend to be reasonable and to have the common sense to understand that she was in no position to look after the child when she clearly said that she was not even home yet.

ETA I agree that just saying "No" would have been better but I totally understand the OP's thinking.

Be angry about this morning. Tell her it was one step too far and it broke the camels back.

OP, you are braver than you perhaps believe yourself to be. You escaped an abusive relationship. That takes courage. Putting this CF non-friend user in the bin should be easy after that. But it seems that you may not yet have escaped the people-pleasing ingrained feelings and habits of your abusive relationship. Read and re-read this thread. Let it soak into your psyche and tell the CF to get out of your life forever. You’ve had many great suggestions for wordings. You deserve to and are allowed to say NO MORE. You can do it. We’re rooting for you!

You need to be firm. This person is a CF, clearly giving her details of how inconvenient it will be for you is not enough. You have to say you can't drop him off, no need to give a reason just say no. If she turns up don't answer the door.
Stop being a doormat for these people