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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Cheeky Fckers

410 replies

thisisasurvivor · 29/03/2024 20:43

I had a work trip on mon and Tue

Tue was a 12 hour day and was up since 4 working

My friend text at 9.30pm to let me know she needed to drop her soon uo at 8am
The next fcking day to be looked after

I text back that I was not even home yet

She didn't respond

7.40am next day knock on door
She dropped her son off

I was so angry/tired/ bewildered to go bat shit

SHE DIDNT TEXT AFTER TO EVEN SAY SORRY OR TO THANK me

I'm so done with letting this shit happen

Sorry I just need to vent

Next time she asks I need a firm response

No doesn't seem to work as she has been known to come up anyway and say she has no one

I'm a single parent and I work from home

She has dropped her kids to me many times while I work from home

Fcking cheek

She has many sister in laws who can step in wt f is she still as this utter shit

OP posts:
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Original poster
thisisasurvivor · 16/04/2024 05:37

AcrossthePond55 · 15/04/2024 21:41

@thisisasurvivor

I'm sure that CF has realized that, as sisters, you and DSis have gotten together and compared notes. I doubt either one of you will hear from her again. She'll now be looking for someone new to impose on.

Here's hoping

OP posts:
AcrossthePond55 · 15/04/2024 21:41

@thisisasurvivor

I'm sure that CF has realized that, as sisters, you and DSis have gotten together and compared notes. I doubt either one of you will hear from her again. She'll now be looking for someone new to impose on.

Original poster
thisisasurvivor · 15/04/2024 15:53

No

Nothing

She was wanting to see if CF would get in touch first

Total silence so hopefully that's an end to the cfery

And yes me being direct weeks ago would have worked wonders too 😐🙃

OP posts:
Pipsquiggle · 15/04/2024 11:17

thisisasurvivor · 15/04/2024 09:52

Not a thank you

Or an apology

Appears she has the hump as my sister explained to her family the trouble that she caused on Saturday

🤷‍♀️

but did your D sis actually say / text anything to CF?

Like 'You absolutely took the piss today. I will never be available for babysitting for you again'

Original poster
thisisasurvivor · 15/04/2024 09:52

Not a thank you

Or an apology

Appears she has the hump as my sister explained to her family the trouble that she caused on Saturday

🤷‍♀️

OP posts:
Astariel · 14/04/2024 18:28

AhNowTed · 14/04/2024 16:45

Why are folks insisting the OP "report her".

To who, and for what?

Woman leaves children with grown adults!

To social services.

She routinely and regularly leaves her kids with people then doesn’t turn up to collect them - picking them up many hours after she should have.

That is not ok. Just because the other people are adults, it is absolutely not ok to just decide you’re going out for brunch (presumably drinking) and turn up 9 hours later when someone said they’d have them for one hour.

That is a safeguarding issue. A childcare setting would call social services if you did that.

AhNowTed · 14/04/2024 16:45

Why are folks insisting the OP "report her".

To who, and for what?

Woman leaves children with grown adults!

Original poster
thisisasurvivor · 14/04/2024 16:36

LookItsMeAgain · 13/04/2024 21:36

You won't do anything to stop this woman dumping her children on other kind and generous people (like your sister or yourself) and you've just said your sister won't do anything either?
If you won't do it for the mother in this situation, why wouldn't you step in and do something for her poor kids??? They didn't ask to be in these situations but they are clearly being left in them because their own parents are such shitty people.

Do it for their kids.

If you don't do anything, then by your own inaction you're also part of the problem here.

Flip sake

OP posts:
Original poster
thisisasurvivor · 14/04/2024 16:36

WaitingforCheese · 13/04/2024 22:32

Reminds of when my friend had this open weekend where people came to stay in tents in her garden (I didn’t go, I don’t camp). One couple asked her to look after their toddler whilst they popped to the shop in the town about 10 minutes away.
They came back 7 hours later, after refusing to answer the phone, after deciding to have a day out as ‘they never have time on their own’. Apparently toddler had never been left before and cried all day. They didn’t think they had done anything wrong.

Wtaf

My stomach turned reading this

Fck sake

OP posts:
LakeTiticaca · 13/04/2024 23:00

If she appears on your or your sisters doorstep again with the kids in tow, just don't answer the door

WaitingforCheese · 13/04/2024 22:32

Reminds of when my friend had this open weekend where people came to stay in tents in her garden (I didn’t go, I don’t camp). One couple asked her to look after their toddler whilst they popped to the shop in the town about 10 minutes away.
They came back 7 hours later, after refusing to answer the phone, after deciding to have a day out as ‘they never have time on their own’. Apparently toddler had never been left before and cried all day. They didn’t think they had done anything wrong.

70isaLimitNotaTarget · 13/04/2024 22:25

I would also second the reporting . And as your Sister is a Dr then really it is her moral responsibility as a Health Care Professional to do so .

It will carry more clout too .

If your sister had contacted the resturant and got them to relay a message "Excuse me CF , we have a Dr SisterofSurvivor on the phone and she says you must get home immediately . No she didn't say why but said it was imperative you got home now"

Not saying there's a medical emergency , that is cruel to lie like that , but enough to shift her arse .
It would have showed her up in front of her fellow brunchers

Are you going to persue her for the owed money ? Then block her .

Mnk711 · 13/04/2024 22:05

Another vote here for reporting her. As others have said this is a form of neglect and if she's doing this how do you know she's not e.g. leaving them home alone when it suits her? It is good you are now saying no but I am surprised neither of you feel confident enough to say to her - this behaviour is not OK. Abandoning your children and treating people like your servants is not OK. We will no longer enable you.

Pipsquiggle · 13/04/2024 21:56

@thisisasurvivor

I really do hope you and your sister find your rage and make sure you direct it at CF

LookItsMeAgain · 13/04/2024 21:36

You won't do anything to stop this woman dumping her children on other kind and generous people (like your sister or yourself) and you've just said your sister won't do anything either?
If you won't do it for the mother in this situation, why wouldn't you step in and do something for her poor kids??? They didn't ask to be in these situations but they are clearly being left in them because their own parents are such shitty people.

Do it for their kids.

If you don't do anything, then by your own inaction you're also part of the problem here.

Original poster
thisisasurvivor · 13/04/2024 20:46

Astariel · 13/04/2024 19:42

You and your sister should call the NSPCC and report serious safeguarding concerns.

These are serious safeguarding concerns. This woman (and her husband) are routinely abandoning their children with people and turning up many hours later with no communication.

And that’s the shitty parenting that you can see here. What the fuck goes on behind closed doors?

It is a big problem to agree 1 hour of childcare and then turn up 9 or so hours later. If she did it to a nursery or childminder, they’d call social services.

Mg sister won't

She has had enough and is just exhausted now

I have her blocked

Too much time wasted for her and she does so little

Fwiw she was never a good friend
When I fled d v she was trying to get all the details out of me when I just wanted to hide away
She was a real gossip relaying it back to her wider family etc
One of those types sadly

OP posts:
TeabySea · 13/04/2024 20:13

Astariel · 13/04/2024 19:42

You and your sister should call the NSPCC and report serious safeguarding concerns.

These are serious safeguarding concerns. This woman (and her husband) are routinely abandoning their children with people and turning up many hours later with no communication.

And that’s the shitty parenting that you can see here. What the fuck goes on behind closed doors?

It is a big problem to agree 1 hour of childcare and then turn up 9 or so hours later. If she did it to a nursery or childminder, they’d call social services.

Completely agree.
She gets away with this because people let her. Even so often she drops a gift or returns a favour and theoretically is forgiven and therefore permitted to do exactly the same thing again.

AhNowTed · 13/04/2024 19:59

AhNowTed · 13/04/2024 13:36

Another banking it will be more like 5.

What did I tell you 😂

Astariel · 13/04/2024 19:42

You and your sister should call the NSPCC and report serious safeguarding concerns.

These are serious safeguarding concerns. This woman (and her husband) are routinely abandoning their children with people and turning up many hours later with no communication.

And that’s the shitty parenting that you can see here. What the fuck goes on behind closed doors?

It is a big problem to agree 1 hour of childcare and then turn up 9 or so hours later. If she did it to a nursery or childminder, they’d call social services.

dapsnotplimsolls · 13/04/2024 19:38

Please tell me you've blocked her.

Original poster
thisisasurvivor · 13/04/2024 19:36

dapsnotplimsolls · 13/04/2024 19:35

Your sister needs to contact her 'After today's 'one hour' turned into 8.5 hours, I will no longer be available to look after your children.'

And then block the fucker.

Exactly !!!

Rather than say nothing
Which is the mistake I made

OP posts:
dapsnotplimsolls · 13/04/2024 19:35

Your sister needs to contact her 'After today's 'one hour' turned into 8.5 hours, I will no longer be available to look after your children.'

And then block the fucker.

Original poster
thisisasurvivor · 13/04/2024 19:31

hottchocolatte · 13/04/2024 15:25

They are cheeky but it's ridiculous you e allowed this to happen again and again.

I stopped it a while ago

I did not directly let today happen now come on

When the nit picking. Starts

Is today my fault now too?

Well done CF
Well done

OP posts:
Original poster
thisisasurvivor · 13/04/2024 19:30

PuppyMonkey · 13/04/2024 17:40

I’m just catching up on this and trying to work it out, as it seems a tad ridiculous. But these kids are now at a party that they’ve not been invited to? And the CF is expected to go pick the up from there? On time?

What could possibly go wrong?

This is after she dropped kids to my sister for one hour then text it will be 3pm

My sister had to bring her kids to party
My cousin stepped in to offer lifts

And yea it is utterly ridiculous

Maybe if she had said to my sister when she dropped them off so sorry it will now be a lot later than I said my sister could have made her mind up there and then

Or at least have the fcking option

OP posts:
Original poster
thisisasurvivor · 13/04/2024 19:28

dapsnotplimsolls · 13/04/2024 17:49

Have the poor bleddy kids been collected from the party yet?

Yes they have

My cousin told me she rocked up at half 4

Original pick up time 3

She has not text my sister does not seem very happy with her right now

Oh the irony

It appears she is peeved that we got her mother involved too

She's a cow and is used to people bending sideways for her

OP posts: