Broken beyond belief

Oh and well done for bagging up his stuff. It’s a marathon not a sprint and your doing so well

I’m the same with social media, for similar reasons.
I did enjoy it when I had it under a nickname, I ended up having to change it to my actual name and then add work people etc. I miss a lot of life on there and probably opportunities. On the whole it’s better for my mental health though. However, with a view to you (and my reason to post!) you could have it under a Nick name so you get the benefits, get to add anyone you want and keep it slightly more under the radar?

Yes!!! 💪🏼🥳 You got this. You are so much stronger than you believe. I hope the sun is shining where you are today and you can get out and do something nice today. X

Excellent work! And excellent attitude!

You've just taken a huge step forward. Applaud yourself, do something for yourself, even if it's just buying yourself a bar of chocolate or a pair of new socks.

Celebrate yourself!

Well done OP. You brought yourself back from the brink single-handedly.
I love that you recognise that his mum’s excuse for his appalling behaviour is weak and inexcusable. She simply isn’t strong enough to help him …he has to help himself, so she will be abused by him over and over again until she finally kicks him out.
The disappointments and betrayals are so tough to get over and let go of but keep going OP. You are past the frozen stage. With each filled black bin, hard as it is, you are actually starting to deal with it. Doing the practicalities forces you to deal with the emotions.

I've just read this thread all the way through. You need the applause, you are a strong and amazing lady, don't ever forget this!👏👏👏👏🤩

Well done for starting to get his stuff together. You are soon going to realise just how strong you actually are. I know it perhaps doesn’t feel that way right now. But you are strong.

My (single parent) cousin used 'meetup' (in the US) after her last relationship broke down. She's found a lovely group and they meet for breakfast once a week and she's gone on outings with different members. Her DD used it to find an all female hiking group.

Could you have a look at meetup.com?

Loads of groups on there for a variety of interests - could you have a look to see what your town has?

In my town there is a Facebook group called Insert town name girls. And they do loads of different meet ups for local females- group walks, girls nights out, different meet ups for women looking for friends in their 20s/30s/40s etc, small hobby groups. All run by local volunteers. It’s amazing for meeting new people and building a social life. Maybe look and see if there is anything like that local to you.

I’ll be here responding to your threads and sending positive thoughts your way for as long as you’d like to keep posting here.

You perhaps don’t have a thriving support group of friends around you right now because all your energy and focus has been sapped by your awful ex. And potential friend may have been put off by his presence in your life. Once you get him out the picture you will have much more time to focus on yourself and widening your friendship circle and hobby time. Start small by making more effort to chat and be friendly to your colleagues, your neighbours. When you feel ready you can look into hobby groups, group exercise, local walking groups etc whatever floats your boat. If you let us know your hobbies and interests maybe we could all brainstorm some ideas for you? X

And we'll stay here to keep you company for as long as you want.

Just keep this place in mind when you're struggling. It's invaluable that way.

You're understandably in a right state ATM but if you can, take time for some deep breaths, a cup of tea and a chat with a friend. You certainly won't be fired. You're doing great. Self care all the way at the minute ❣️

@StuckHurtDone

The fact that you are taking time off because you know it's the wise thing to do shows that you do have your head on straight. Hopefully, your employers will realize this. I'm sure they will. Perhaps you can use these extra days to bag his stuff up. Even if you aren't ready to dump it on his mum's porch, it's still a gesture you can make towards cutting him out of your life. Bag it, throw it in the closet or the garage. At least you won't have to see it.

I think I've kind of figured out the sim contract thing lol. I think others are right, if there's no way to suspend service, you should report it as stolen. Have you by any chance looked at your online account? We used to be able to suspend/reinstate service online. We used it a few times when our sons were teens and weren't following the 'phone rules'. What's odd is that the sim is tied to your account, yet he can use it in a phone that's in a totally separate account.

I guess you could always send a text to the bastard saying "The sim in your phone belongs to me as it is on my contract. You must take it out of the phone and return it to me immediately". Then when he tells you to fuck off (which he will) you'll have proof that you asked for it back in case you're asked to prove you don't have it. If your old phone was wiped and then he set it up under his own Apple account, then no you can't wipe it. But I agree with a PP who said that you should call and explain the situation, stressing perhaps that he used coercive control to get you to add him on. Maybe you'll get someone sympathetic.

Woudk it help to get seom clarity round your rights and so on? I would like to think a person can't lose a jon due to being unwell/ in a crisis?

Wise decision.

You need the time off. Take the break now, avoid the breakdown later ❤️