To say no more bringing the dog to our house

It would be a hard no from me and would have been the first time. I’m not a huge dog lover, don’t mind other peoples and giving them a fuss but wouldn’t want them in my house. The smells, potential for accidents inside etc, no

If the children want to bring the dog with them personally, I would happily let them, but I love dogs and would enjoy the walks as a family. People saying the mum should have thought of this etc are assuming she is asking the kids to take it, no one knows that for sure. OP you are within your rights to say no and tell children/their mother you don’t want them bringing it - she will likely be fine with it and was just trying to keep the kids happy, if she’s not she will have to sort something else out. Keep in mind kids may be hurt/upset or annoyed you won’t let them bring their dog, but ultimately it’s your house so up to you.

No way I would have a dog in my house. I don't like their mess. You are not unreasonable to put your foot down on this one OP. anyone who thinks otherwise is frankly bonkers.

Say no now before this gets out of hand!

Don’t tell me your husband thinks you should be doing it…?!

I agree with the sentiment that a dog shouldn't be left all night, but it's not the OP's dog! She has no responsibility at all.

It's not your responsibility but if you didn't want the dog, why on earth did you agree to have it in the first place?

God no. Just say no from now.

Poor dog. It's not your fault and you're not being unreasonable, but that poor dog. What were they thinking?

I'd be interested to know what your husband says. What if it falls ill while you have it? Has an accident? Who'll pay for the vet?
For me, this would be a lesson for the kids that you do your research before getting any animal, about how it'll be looked after, how it fits with working patterns, before you get it. It doesn't become someone else's responsibility if you fuck up and can't manage it. She's taking the piss.

Right so...I'd love to have a dog but unfortunately there's no one at home in the day...everyone is at school or work. It wouldn't be fair to the poor dog being left alone all day.

@Copperoliverbear you're not Edinburgh way by any chance? If so, I'll rethink. Thanks so much. 😊

You need to get a couple of hamsters who cry all night when they're away from the children.

I would be very quickly discovering a dog allergy. I say that as a dog lover who can't have a dog currently due to our set up.

I meant mother not step mother!

Because it isn't her dog! What about all the other dogs that have to stay home while their owners are out? Is she expected to put her hand up for them too? You are the unreasonable one!

Wow. You've been nice enough by letting the dog stay at all, call it a day now love

Are you ok?

This. OP didn't get the dog. It's not her problem the dog is alone. Sad for the dog yes but still not her problem.

in the interests of the dog welfare, perhaps it should be rehomed be rehomed if the ex can’t look after it. Yes the children will be upset for a while, but they’ll get over it.

I’m a dog owner and I agree with you. Dogs are big responsibilities.

How old is the dog? A puppy? If so, that’s harder work. It’ll need letting out etc during the night, going for walks, and generally someone watching it most of the day. They can be relentless.

If the mum wants a dog, she needs to take full responsibility for it.

You’re there to look after your step kids, and not a step-dog.

Hold firm. The dog is NOT your responsibility.

Yes. You’re at home anyway. Can you have my 4 dogs for a couple of days next week as well? Oh and my cat? Thanks. 🤣🤣🤣

I feel sorry for the dog and my kids wouldn’t actually want to leave our dogs for 3 nights a week. Oldest misses our dogs terribly when he’s at uni.

In this case though, the step mother has been irresponsible, but that’s not your problem. Does step mum sleep in the day presumably? When does the dog get company on those days? Again, not your problem. I’d do it for the dogs sake but you’re under no obligation here. SM should never have got a dog without a plan for how she’s look after the poor thing properly.

Ah, the classic assumption 'you're at home all day, so your time and energy can be treated as a free resource for any CF who wants to take advantage'. Funny how that only seems to apply to women.

Are you ok with having your house smell of dog? If not, don't have a dog in the house.

YANBU. It'd be all the nopes from me. Bloody cheek!

Of course you are not being unreasonable.

As you put it OP if you'd wanted a dog, you would have your own.

The issue of the dog being alone overnight is the owners responsibility to address and something they should have considered prior to getting a dog.

Frankly I'd not have even allowed this once. It's a slippery slope. Keep having the dog overnight and I'll bet good money the next step will be you providing doggy care for holidays/sickness/nights out and then mum can no longer look after the dog at all (because it's clearly an ill thought out premise to start with) and you'll be expected to home it full time as the kids have bonded with it and the dog knows/is comfortable in your home.

You'll say no and be the evil step mother for breaking the children's hearts when dog has to be rehoused.

Draw a firm line now. Owning a dog is a big responsibility and not one you should be pressured into even on a part time basis.