Different perceptions of autistic adults and those with adhd?

@Cornemuse 2 hairdressers, chef, yoga instructor, realtor, architect, IT, and instrumentation tech. The realtor, architect, and IT family members have uni degrees. Instrumentation via a college program and apprenticeship.
interestingly only those with inattentive adhd take meds the others all incorporate fitness into their workday and are very careful with food choices/coffee.

Many people seem to identify with ADHD traits/behaviours in my experience though I only know a few women with a formal diagnosis. Some of my friends have scored highly on ADHD tests or the RAAD-S R test for ASD, but either didn't pursue formal diagnosis or are still waiting. Until a few years ago, nobody seemed to know much about ADHD in adults. In females it's often missed until 40s.

In my area the wait for neuropsychological testing is around 3 years.

May I please ask: what kind of careers are well-suited to your ADHD family members? I have an ADHD child so I'm trying to start thinking about the sorts of jobs he might want to do and for which he might be well-suited.

This was my DD (diagnosed with autism at 14). Quiet, clever and compliant through primary, burnout and mental health crisis on transition to secondary.

@Coincidentally

How rude

Maybe you
Need to Open your eyes to those children quietly sitting at the back that never cause trouble and rarely say anything in class however their work is of a high standard.

These are the kids that get.
"Very bright but doesn't contribute in class "
On every school report.

Maybe those are the ones that get to secondary and can't cope and end up with serious mental health issues.

Maybe as a teacher you could see that 2+2 isn't always 4 and what you see in your classroom is not reflected at home or in secondary school.

No wonder ND kids hit crisis at school with this type of bias in the profession

Perhaps this is because of the more recent change in definition? Autism did use to only be given as a diagnosis to males with intellectual disability. Asperger’s was given as a separate diagnosis and the high IQ and monotropism led to many famous and truly exceptional people. Autism spectrum now covers females, Asperger’s, PDA etc. the general population will catch up with this at some point!

I've got both , diagnosed
Never given it a thought how I'm perceived.
Seriously ,I couldn't care less who thinks what of me ,to busy trying to cope with life

I have a son who was diagnosed with adhd several years ago and very recently got a diagnosis of autism. From my experience I found it more difficult to present autism in a positive light in the way we did when we talked about him having adhd; autism seems to be considered as more of a disability to me than adhd (I know that's not always the case, just that both me and his dad felt this). People often talk about adhd superpowers but this is less talked about with ASD.

I am autistic and possibly ADHD by the way but don't tell anyone as I worry how they will think of me

I think the perception may be that autistic people may have "something wrong with them" especially if those perceiving know children who are severely autistic, non verbal, whereas they think ADHD are just a bit hyper!

I'm autistic and ADHD as are my kids in various mixes of ND.

From my experience autism is seen as a deficit. It's confused with learning disability and people assume you are less intelligent and less able. ADHD is seen as a fad like you have jumped on the band wagon to be cool- you are an attention seeker etc. People seem less aware of the struggles that go with adhd so while the understanding is often poor it doesn't come with the assumption you are ignorant as comes with autism.

There is also huge difference in the sexes and innate sexism at play i would say. My girl child's struggles are dismissed because she's social masking and therefore can't be autistic. My boy child has bad behaviour allowed 'because he's autistic' where I would actually pull him up on it. I see this a lot with boy autistics they get away with things, often rightly so as they are struggling, but the girls never get the same allowances made for them

Or maybe the children are masking at school and are out of control at home?

My sons teacher suggested to me that he had ADHD.... which led to my own ADHD diagnosis. 2 years down the line DS is still on a waiting list but his behaviour at school is now brilliant, hes very good at school now....... then he comes home, unmasks and hes a completely different child. Thankfully he has had the same teacher these last 2 years who knows how to support him and has helped his behaviour, because if he had a new teacher now and I said suspected ADHD I doubt theyd believe it as hes so good at school!

My DD has suspected Autism and I've found people to be more understanding of the autism rathar than the sneering ADHD gets

Do you point out that one/both parents probably also have ADHD - I think there is a bit of a stigma for adults whereas hyperactive children with short attention span is ok.

ADHD is very fashionable-I am a a teacher and parents seem to be queuing up to get a diagnosis- but for autism no so much. Sadly there does seem to be a stigma still attached to autism, whereas an ADHD label is seen as licence to be ‘delightfully disorganised’ and unfortunately attracts the attention seekers. W

“The Social Model of Disability was developed by Disabled people and describes people as being disabled by barriers in society, not by our impairment or difference. If modern life was set up in a way that was accessible for Disabled people, then we would not be excluded or restricted.”

https://www.disabilityrightsuk.org/social-model-disability-language#:~:text=The%20Social%20Model%20of%20Disability,not%20be%20excluded%20or%20restricted.

Autism and ADHD are different; whilst my very young (at the time) ds was being pulled apart from the age of 6, mostly made awful by some very young teachers diagnozing ds's difficulties as due to a 'parenting deficit' with the LEA fully complicit in that.

12 years later Devon CC (Yes- looking at you DCC) were put into Special Measures and a letter of apology were sent to all of us SEND parents.

Anyways, CAMHS were massively supportive at the time but after ds Yr2 was permanently excluded, the next nearest school would only accept ds if he was 'medicated'.

Well, that only lasted a few weeks as I wasn't going to drug my son for a condition he didn't have. If you don't have ADHD, Ritalin is similar to amphetimines - what sane person would give their 6/7yr old speed?

We had to leave Devon for nearly a decade, just to get ds back to being 'sorted out' enough to overcome the shit he was dealt.

We're doing ok now. Autism and ADHD are not the same although quite a few might have both conditions.

But it’s not what you’ve described

I know exactly what the social model of dusability is thank you. I just don’t agree with it.

Eg I can’t stand people who are late or flakey ( but I can manage friends who have rigid thinking (possibly as I lack spontaneity too). But I’.m not very tolerant of people who are over anxious.

People who have autism and people who have adhd are not autonomous groups though. Each person will have things which they struggle with as will other people who don’t have those particular neurodiversity’s.

You’re friends with people you like and have things in common with and less so with others,

I agree OP. I'm autistic and feel it is definitely more stigmatised than ADHD amongst adults. I think autism is seen as "Rainman" still whereas ADHD is seen as someone who is energetic, distracted easily and perhaps disorganised. (Obviously both untrue representations).

I think you’ve misunderstood the social model of disability and what it means.

This type of toxic positivity rubbish completely invalidates the struggles ND people have. And not everyone who is ND experiences positives from their condition. The social model of disability is similar. While I can see the advantages to it in encouraging adjustments and adaptations for disabled people, adjustments and adaptations do not stop you being disabled. I am disabled by my condition sat at home on my own. I don't need to venture out into society to experience my disability. It's very apparent almost all of the time.

Ironic that you can’t see in your post what you have criticised others for. Many people have both ASC and ADHD and social difficulties are common with ADHD too. Many people with ASC mask so don’t do any of those things you have stereotyped the ASC community with. Those with adhd can be blunt, have social difficulties, continually butt in during conversations, have annoying impulsivity…. I don’t write all people with adhd with such traits though.🤔