To ask if anyone has given their DCs an “old fashioned childhood”?

I don’t really understand this idea that kids need ‘tech’ at home so as not to fall behind. All the tech I have ever had to use personally and professionally has either been completely intuitive or useable after a quick Google for instructions. Surely when the time comes that they need it, they’ll work it out quickly? Unless you’re talking about coding but that’s a niche skill.

Lived in Germany for 6 years and almost noone had kids on screens and phones. Moved to the USA and our kids didn't get a phone until 13 or 14.
They all had a young childhood (under 12) that was what I would consider wholesome and not dominated by media. They are 17-23 now, so this was 5+ years ago. You need friends and a community with the same values as much as possible.

Mine did, although my youngest is 19! I also stayed at home until they had all left school!
They did watch quite a lot of TV though (but no screens in their rooms) and loved their games consoles but the winters are long and dark where we are! Walked to school, played in the park after, lots of playing in woods and fields, visits to friends farms, camping holidays. Later on there was a bit of alfresco drinking as is traditional in country areas.
My main regret is that we didn't move to the town where their high school was located as they would have had a better social life.
One is a bit of a screen addict, mostly online gaming but he is studying computing so hard to avoid, however the other two are studying subjects related to activities and interests they developed as kids that had nothing to do with screens.
None of them are particularly into social media and are a bit scathing about those a bit younger than them who are really into it.

I don't think restricting access to tech will have the same effect for all children. Much will depend on the child themselves (aptitude, interest etc), their socio-economic background and what they actually do with the tech at hand.

Several hours of mindless doom-scrolling on social media is arguably not as productive as a couple of hours of focussed effort at coding.

@colouredball this why we're learning the harms of it while it's harming our kids. Yes it's amazing technology if we're using it to learn but it can be harmful and addictive if we're consuming it mindlessly.
How many adults are addicted? Is this what we want for our children? We can't deny there's a danger here too.

Ours mostly did. We live rurally and had terrible internet until about 5 years ago and no mobile phone signal. There really wasn't an option to be glued to a screen.

I'm always surprised when people say kids won't manage to handle technology if not exposed to it. My generation wasn't but we managed to learn to use computers, internet, phones, etc no problem.

We learnt at the same speed though, being exposed to each thing as it came along. To deliberately withhold tech from children will leave them behind their peers, so while they will of course be able to learn, they will not be at the same level as the other children.

I think it's funny how parents are falling over themselves to have the highest achiever, best reader, etc but don't want their kids to progress with technology at the rate their peers do

It sounds totally bonkers out of context, doesn't it?! TBF it's pretty bonkers even in the books.

@SarahAndQuack

Oh, I didn't know that! Thank you

Not really but I tried to give them lots of time outdoors and lots of time with books.
We did lots of things outdoors like skimming stones, paddling in streams, flying kites, building forts on a beach and gathering twigs to build dens and homes for wildlife and so on.
They still had screens though. I couldn't cope if The Lion King couldn't act as a babysitter from time to time.

Who is 'we'? The many people who are currently struggling because they didn't manage to cope with technology changing? Perhaps you mean you were the rather lucky, well-adjusted people who would have managed fine anyway?

OTOH, if you are a pensioner who is struggling to cope with paying your bills, and you've never used the internet and have always worked in jobs where you didn't need to so much as turn on a computer, you may find it harder.

It's not a different situation from today's children. It's probably fine to deprive your child of access to technology if you also have 4-5 acres, money for a pony and sailing lessons, and so on. Your child will doubtless be given the resources to catch up.

But if your child is living in temporary accommodation, and you're finding it hard to pay for clothing and food, let alone access to technology, it's another story.

Ours were also allowed to "play out" from about 5 and walk to the shops (about an 8min walk with a pelican crossing) from about 8ish(?). However, we don't live in a city, we live on the edge of a town, in a fairly middle class area, which makes this easier, though.

None of ours had screens until 7 and no phones until 11 (and their first was a "brick"). . No TV or phones in their rooms until 14. And no computer/laptop in their room until 18.
They are allowed to go online/game/etc... but it all needs to be downstairs. No social media until 13 (which, incidentally, is the age for a lot of SM platforms anyway, so from that perspective we were just "following the rules").

They all had to take turns with chores around the house from a very young age and were given increasing responsibility for things as they got older.

I'm still trying to work out how effective all of this is.

Agreed. Train your child to thrive in the age and area they live. Anything else is setting them up for difficulty.

@ZenNudist 😁That brings back memories! I'm not sure if I'd want my children playing with the locals - I hear that corporal punishment is rife in your area.

It's a reference to Enid Blyton?

We didn't have any tablets/iPads or games consoles when mine were little. They are teens now and we've still not got iPads in the house but of course they do all have phones now.

We couldn't afford consoles and tablets when they were small which is why we didn't have them. But when they went to other kids houses they'd get obsessed with the consoles and I'd wonder if it would be better to have them at home so it's less of a novelty when at friends houses.

They got their own games console for their rooms when they were teenagers. We were grateful for these over lockdown!

In my experience it's hard for kids to be different to others - can't easily do an "old fashioned" childhood unless all their friends are doing that too!

I still don't allow phones at the dining table at home or in restaurants. Even if we'd been able to afford iPads I don't think I would ever have allowed them out and about. They'd have been useful for long journeys mind! There's only so much I Spy a mum can take 😂

I'm always surprised when people say kids won't manage to handle technology if not exposed to it. My generation wasn't but we managed to learn to use computers, internet, phones, etc no problem.

Can't quite work out if you are being sarcastic or not here.

I did already give an example of how being let out from contemporary technology is alienating. But you'd have to read the whole thread, sorry! It's quite a lot of text but it is there.

Can you give examples? Because this is not something I’ve experienced in years of working in schools.

Really? Early Years here learn basics about coding at school. Do you sincerely believe waiting until year 5 to access tech is sensible?
Also what about the "technological requirements" of life. Very little is paper based.
I believe in 2024 there should be a balance / happy medium of tech plus outdoors/ social interactions.

And to answer your question OP - somewhat. No small screens is easy tbh. Just don’t introduce them. The playing out thing is a bit dependant on where you live; our neighbourhood isn’t great for it so instead we meet up with friends at forests, beaches etc where the kids can play out of our sight and try to give them plenty of unstructured free outdoor play that way.

I beg to differ! Children who aren't able to access technology at home are at a huge disadvantage.

Do you mean because kids are less tech savvy, or because they can’t actually access homework?
if the former, no. If the latter, I think it depends on the school - we haven’t had any issues until P5 as homework has all been paper based, but it’s now online so DD accesses it via my phone.

It’s absolutely not the case that kids need to use tablets etc at home (for fun or ‘educational’ apps) in order to be prepared for the technology requirements of the curriculum.

Me! I made my daughters wear nice dresses, my son wore trousers and jumpers, none of this tracksuit lark. We also had my siblings child living here some of the time but she was more inclined to dress up.

In the mornings the kids helped me in the house whilst DH went out to work. The girls did domestic tasks, cooking, cleaning and tidying. DS did garden and heavy lifting work.

Once they'd done their tasks, in the absence of screens I let them out to play in the local area. We live somewhere very rural and there's a woodland next to our house. The kids spend hours there and beg to be let out to play again.

They seem to have made friends with some other children in the local area but they all have bizarre nicknames like Silky Moon-Face and Saucepan Man.

It hasn't done them any harm and it's really helped their creativity and imagination. I often hear them talking about the games they play in the woods. Something about a tree far away and lots of strange lands they visited. Its done them the world of good to be banned from the ipad and xbox.

Of course whilst they are out playing I'm on mumsnet and DH plays grand theft auto.