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Original poster

Night out drama - old boss

243 replies

Geordielass35 · 24/03/2024 03:08

I've been on a hen night in Belfast. It's been a great weekend and people have been so friendly. Been drinking and dancing, went to the Titanic museum as well.

My old boss is on the hen night. She was a bitch at times when I worked with her and was very judgemental of others, including me, when I worked for her.

Anyway tonight she has clearly cheated on her husband. I saw her leave the bar with a man now I can hear her in the next room and she's not alone...

I know people that know both of them. Do I say something or just keep it quiet, since it's none of my business. I'm desperate to tell people and it's wrong what she did, but is it my business to mention it?! I'm torn on it. Reasonable or not reasonable to tell the people close to her husband?

OP posts:
Nicetobenice67 · 24/03/2024 16:38

HRTQueen · 24/03/2024 09:20

its not your business to get involved in other peoples relationships

if you knew them well as a couple maybe talk to her and have a discussion around why she should tell him but you don’t have that relationship

if you want to gossip about what you saw and hear to feel you are getting your own back is one thing to act as the moral police is quite another

So if it happened to you you would be ok with people keeping it from you …wow your so understanding

Original poster
Geordielass35 · 24/03/2024 16:35

Mummame2222 · 24/03/2024 16:31

Yeah same. Wouldn’t cause myself so much hassle due to someone else’s poor behaviour.

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@Mummame2222 Pleased I didn't say anything and it came out anyway. She caused me a lot of hassle in the early hours of this morning though!

OP posts:
Mummame2222 · 24/03/2024 16:31

Emotionalsupportviper · 24/03/2024 16:28

I wouldn't lie for her - but I wouldn't make a point of dropping her in it, either.

To me this would be none of my business. She isn't a relative or close friend, so OP has no loyalty to other family members or friends (that would be different). Just keep out of it.

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Yeah same. Wouldn’t cause myself so much hassle due to someone else’s poor behaviour.

Emotionalsupportviper · 24/03/2024 16:28

Mummame2222 · 24/03/2024 16:21

If I was asked I wouldn’t lie for her.

I wouldn't lie for her - but I wouldn't make a point of dropping her in it, either.

To me this would be none of my business. She isn't a relative or close friend, so OP has no loyalty to other family members or friends (that would be different). Just keep out of it.

Original poster
Geordielass35 · 24/03/2024 16:27

diddl · 24/03/2024 16:14

Well of course just because she thinks he's cheating it doesn't mean that he is or that she should cheat!

I'm guessing she realised she was seen leaving the bar with the bloke & felt she had to explain herself?

Seems as well that you said nothing Op.

I was going to suggest that when you met her husband at the wedding you could have said that you didn't recognise him when you saw him at the hotel in Belfast!

@diddl As tempting as that would have been I wouldn't have done it out of respect for the bride. First and foremost my loyalties are with her and making sure she has a happy time.

OP posts:
Mummame2222 · 24/03/2024 16:21

If I was asked I wouldn’t lie for her.

Bigcat25 · 24/03/2024 16:20

Can't stand cheaters. I'd be tempted to tell.

Ohlookwhoitis · 24/03/2024 16:19

Treesandsheepeverywhere · 24/03/2024 15:31

😅, True!

Not making excuses for her but sounds like she was trying to portray a happy home life whilst being cheated on and taking it out on her colleagues.

Hopefully it's that and gets a chance to redeem herself other than her being naturally not a good person.

I believe in hurt people hurt others.

I was cheated on and managed not to treat people like shit. Imagine the same reply if this thread was about a man cheating. Wouldn't happen.

diddl · 24/03/2024 16:14

Well of course just because she thinks he's cheating it doesn't mean that he is or that she should cheat!

I'm guessing she realised she was seen leaving the bar with the bloke & felt she had to explain herself?

Seems as well that you said nothing Op.

I was going to suggest that when you met her husband at the wedding you could have said that you didn't recognise him when you saw him at the hotel in Belfast!

Emotionalsupportviper · 24/03/2024 16:14

MississippiAF · 24/03/2024 03:09

No, keep your mouth shut. It’s not your business.

This - nowt to do with you.

Keep out of it.

I can promise you that if you give in to your desire the dish the dirt it will end as badly for you as it will for her.

Nicetobenice67 · 24/03/2024 16:13

Ohlookwhoitis · 24/03/2024 16:09

Who gives a shit if it's 'gossiping'. Don't cheat publicly if you don't want to be caught. The people on here breaking their necks to defend a dirty cheater is astonishing.

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Absolutely some ppl need to give there head a wobble I wonder if these defenders would rather someone said nothing if it was happening to them or would it be a case of why was I the last to know 🤣🤣

Ohlookwhoitis · 24/03/2024 16:13

IfIHadAHeart · 24/03/2024 11:26

I absolutely will judge anyone using misogynistic language and tearing other women down by calling them sluts, dirty bitches etc. it’s abhorrent.

I spent ten years married to a serial cheat. I still wouldn’t use such awful language. You are no friend to women are you.

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Oh FFS. Grow up. The fucking irony of this post. "Don't judge other women but I can judge you"

SplendidUtterly · 24/03/2024 16:10

I'd snitch!

Ohlookwhoitis · 24/03/2024 16:09

MILLYmo0se · 24/03/2024 10:30

No, if my partner cheated I would want someone to approach me directly with the information /proof, but that's not what the OP is proposing is it? She is proposing gossiping about it with a group of people on a hen party (and I completely understand the temptation given she's a wagon OP!).

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Who gives a shit if it's 'gossiping'. Don't cheat publicly if you don't want to be caught. The people on here breaking their necks to defend a dirty cheater is astonishing.

Nicetobenice67 · 24/03/2024 16:05

Whatevershallidowithmylife · 24/03/2024 09:16

I would tell him absolutely. Wouldn't matter if she hadn't been a bitch, if my partner cheated I hope someone would have the guts to tell me.

💯 I with you on that

Treesandsheepeverywhere · 24/03/2024 15:31

😅, True!

Not making excuses for her but sounds like she was trying to portray a happy home life whilst being cheated on and taking it out on her colleagues.

Hopefully it's that and gets a chance to redeem herself other than her being naturally not a good person.

I believe in hurt people hurt others.

Original poster
Geordielass35 · 24/03/2024 15:24

Treesandsheepeverywhere · 24/03/2024 15:15

Oh good. I've had one of those bosses before and know it can unintentionally steal your joy.

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@Treesandsheepeverywhere not so much my joy this time but certainly my sleep!

Anyway things I've learned/been reminded of:

  1. sometimes saying or doing nothing is better than doing something.
  2. People's lives can be very different to how they portray them on social media
  3. What goes around comes around
OP posts:
Treesandsheepeverywhere · 24/03/2024 15:15

Geordielass35 · 24/03/2024 14:53

@Treesandsheepeverywhere Not at all. Her shagging didn't start till the early hours of this morning, my weekend started late Friday. It's been a good one overall.

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Oh good. I've had one of those bosses before and know it can unintentionally steal your joy.

Trulyme · 24/03/2024 15:10

I’m glad you didn’t say anything, as IME the messenger always ends up getting the blame somehow.

She sounds like an awful person but I wouldn’t do anything that would ruin the brides time or backfire on myself.

Original poster
Geordielass35 · 24/03/2024 14:53

Treesandsheepeverywhere · 24/03/2024 14:37

For an ex boss, you're sure giving her private life too much thought.

Your weekend has been about her and her snagging, focus on your fun and the bride.

@Treesandsheepeverywhere Not at all. Her shagging didn't start till the early hours of this morning, my weekend started late Friday. It's been a good one overall.

OP posts:
Treesandsheepeverywhere · 24/03/2024 14:37

For an ex boss, you're sure giving her private life too much thought.

Your weekend has been about her and her snagging, focus on your fun and the bride.

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 24/03/2024 14:27

KimberleyClark · 24/03/2024 09:10

Absolutely!

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Yes, one thing MN excels at is double standards.

Nicetobenice67 · 24/03/2024 14:07

MoonWoman69 · 24/03/2024 13:58

Mind your own business, she will get found out soon enough. It's absolutely nothing to do with you, however much she pissed you off when you worked with her!

Would you want to know if you were getting cheated on ? Anyway she has admitted it now 🤔

MoonWoman69 · 24/03/2024 13:58

Mind your own business, she will get found out soon enough. It's absolutely nothing to do with you, however much she pissed you off when you worked with her!

Nicetobenice67 · 24/03/2024 13:50

Geordielass35 · 24/03/2024 12:22

Update. She's been withdrawn this morning but has just came out and admitted it. People were like "What's wrong with you" she was saying "Nothing" then suddenly just said it.

She said she is going to end things with her husband, that things hadn't been right for a while and she suspects him of cheating. 2 wrongs don't make a right, I know.

Mixed response from the group but I've kept out of it. So pleased I said nothing! I was going to add a bit of humour about the noise to cut the tension but I didn't.

Not my problem, it's all out. What she does now and others do is up to them but I'd be surprised to see husband at the wedding.

🤣🤣🤣🤣 she won’t end it with him I bet let’s see guess I see a different side to it now she has said her husband is a cheat too but it doesn’t make it right what it means is they deserve each other 🤔