So upset and confused - issue at work

@LipikarAP thank you. I have never had any problems with work until I started working in schools. I did this so I could have a better work/life balance for my family. I wish I had never made the decision.

My boss is fine as long as he doesn’t have to make any decisions or communicate anything. There have been a number of things that have happened that have not been right over the years.

@Puzzledandpissedoff I am such a stickler for fairness. I am an honest person and am always thinking about others. Too much so I think. I am a very conscientious worker. I have put up with a lot in this job. Having to give a task back because my boss wouldn’t deal with an incompetent co worker which resulted in me not being able to do my part of the task. I begged for him to help and got stressed but he didn’t do anything. Then he offered me another, higher paid role only to take this away that afternoon because he had decided to set on externally. I had only been back at work 2 days as I have been off due to bereavement.

Its no wonder I feel
like I do now. The straw that broke the camels back!

@RandomMess Fridays and Mondays are notoriously busy. If I can’t answer the phone then we could end up with complaints. It’s important the phone is answered due to the nature of the business. The work coming in on a Friday is usually last minute, must be done now jobs. I will have no choice but to complete this.
We each have certain responsibilities on set days. These have had to be swapped around because Jane will not be in for the full day on Friday and I have to do this. That’s fine but it’s now added to my workload on a day when there is only me available.

Any work that I can’t finish will
pass to Monday when I am in and another colleague (the job share). We work together but look after different parts of the business. It’s a school so I look after certain years. It means that on a Friday I will be looking after my part of the school and my colleagues part of the school in the afternoon too. If I don’t finish a task for their part of the school, I will carry that onto Monday. It’s not like we all work on the same pot. It’s a clear split and responsibility.

@Puzzledandpissedoff thank you. I will make notes and maybe it won’t be as bad as I am thinking. It’s just the injustice of it all. I like fairness. I think we all like to feel we are being treated fairly and I certainly ensure I am fair with my colleagues. I am so disappointed that Jane took this decision knowing the result for me. She made it clear that she wanted to work Friday mornings so she could benefit from being at home in the afternoon, in case she was going away for the weekend. I never thought she would ask for it and even more shocked she got her wish on that reason alone.

I just can’t be bothering with some one like this. She makes out like everything she does is for the good of the team and has high standards for her colleagues. Always preaching about work morales. She didn’t even speak to me about the change in her shifts but instead sits opposite and emails me instead. Spouting about how we should all be happy that the holidays are approaching and, oh by the way, I have changed my shifts so you can pick up the extra work you sucker!

Sorry I am venting!!!!

Thanks. I agree and think I am overthinking it so appreciate your honest advice. I have gotten myself into such a state about it, it’s ridiculous. It has been on my mind constantly because I feel so angry. @Liquidity.

I don’t know why I am reacting like this. I think I feel like no one was willing to listen to concerns or offer any guidance. I also feel
like it was done for the wrong reasons and not communicated. I feel like I don’t matter.

I don’t care what my manager thinks to be honest. He made a decision that makes no business sense and which directly affects me and will more so in the near future. He did this without explanation or communication. I have every right to ask why that decision was made and to air my concerns in a professional manner which I did. I know the reason it was agreed and that was because he didn’t have the balls to say no to a colleague that feels she should get everything she demands. Otherwise she causes issues.

There is no one else doing the work. When we break for holidays the whole business shuts down. If I am totally honest, I do more than my share of work anyway and always have. I am an idiot and this will not be happening in future.

I decided to take up the offer of speaking to the top boss. I asked her if we could meet and she agreed. However, the week went on and after asking 3 times and being told she was busy but would get around to it, I gave up! We were breaking up for the Easter holidays and I didn’t want to leave the issue for 2 weeks. I did explain this but it made no difference.
My colleague also got the email from Jane and asked to speak to me about it. She said she was 100% in agreement with me. She also has concerns and, although it doesn’t effect her as much, it will effect her if work isn’t being completed. I asked her if she would be willing to speak to our bosses boss with me but it was clear she didn’t want to. I did notice that she was in a meeting with our boss later that afternoon when I unexpectedly returned to the office. Maybe it was about the issue but she hasn’t spoken to me about it since.

I have spoken to my Union rep. She took details and advised me to log everything on my return to the office next week. She did say she would accompany me to any further meetings.

I have had time to consider my next steps and I still feel hurt and under valued. I know that Jane is very aware of the teams workload and that she is fully aware that changing her shifts would have a negative impact on me particularly. She is always very vocal about the amount of work we have, last minute jobs and the amount of calls we answer. She is always saying that Friday is a busy day and often leaves work for her job share to complete because she was too busy on a Friday. She knew exactly what she was doing and suddenly Friday isn’t that busy after all!

I am trying very hard to think she was just looking out for herself and that’s okay! But it’s not okay. I would never have done this to my teammates. I thought we had each others backs. That we respected each other but I have made a mistake and this makes me feel very stupid. My other colleague could have used this opportunity for us to band together and spoken out about it. After all, there is strength in numbers but she doesn’t want to upset Jane!

Anyways, Jane has tried to contact me a couple of times in the holidays. Once to ask if I am enjoying the break and another to ask me to join her and other colleagues for a drink. I have decided that I will remain professional for my own sake but I do not wish to have any contact outside of the office. I think I have learned a big lesson. So my plan is to go back to work, note any issues with the workload and to only discuss work. I think it’s call boundaries. I feel I have to distance myself for my own wellbeing. I think I may have to look for something else but I don’t want to jump ship too quickly until I have had a good think about things. This is one of many issues I have encountered in this job and I know it’s because our manager is not the best.

Any further advice or help??

I posted over a week ago about the issue below. I wanted to give an update….
Below is the original
post

So upset and confused about work.

I have worked there for 5 years. I work in admin for a large company and have 2 colleagues that do the same work as me. General admin, answering calls etc. I am a hard worker.

I am full time. My colleagues job share. One works Mon, Tue, Wed. The other 1/2 day Wed, Thurs, Fri. There is always 2 min admin staff on any day.

Our manager wanted to propose a home working arrangement with his boss. He asked what days we would like. The colleague that works 1/2 day on Wednesday ( let’s call her Jane) was very vocal and felt that anyone that got the Friday working at home was at an advantage as they wouldn’t have the travel time so, in her words, could go out early for the evening . This was quickly dismissed by our boss. Due to the short patterns, there was only actually Jane that could benefit if she got her shifts changed. She got very angry and said “well I might change my shifts to work full day Wed and Thurs and half day Friday so I can finish early on Friday then”. Our boss just laughed.

Last week we had a meeting. Boss wanted to confirm proposals for home working before he spoke to his boss. He gave everyone a home working day. When it got to Jane she was down to work half a day Friday in the morning. I raised my hand and asked how it would work because I would be the only admin person in the office for the afternoon. I explained that the phones are very busy and we always get an influx of last minute admin work before the weekend. I also asked what would happen if I was ill or had an important appointment as there would be no admin staff. My boss advised that he was okay to deal with this as it’s only an afternoon.

As the home working had not been agreed, I decided to wait to see what would happen next. Yesterday we were told that his boss did not agree to it. I thought, fine, that’s the end of it all. No home working, no problem.

Until today when this morning, I got an email from Jane, who was sat opposite me, to say her new shifts had been agreed with our boss and his boss. I just can’t understand the reasoning behind it so asked to speak to my boss. I advised again that I would struggle and explained that it meant that 3 admin staff would be in on Wednesday and only me on Friday afternoons. This balance doesn’t match the workload. I asked how I would be expected to manage this extra workload but he didn’t really answer. I asked what the business need was but he kept referring to a “possible” business need in some months to come. He basically could not give me an answer. We went round and round. I explained that I felt like I am being expected to pick up the work and if there was a real need, I would accept it, but I could see the benefit and he couldn’t provide me with a reason or what the plan was moving forward to help with this increase of workload. Basically, Janes shifts were changed because she shouted loud enough. Our boss is not exactly a great leader and he tries to avoid any kind of conflict.

This is not the only issue he has created in the office/team but I just felt completely dumped on. I was upset that he hadn’t spoken to me because it directly involves me. I was very upset that I got an email from a colleague that was sitting in front of me.

My boss got very defensive and tried saying that I should have tried harder to tell him there was a concern which I did in our meeting. He was raising his voice and became confrontational.

I got so upset that he said I could work from home so I went. His boss emailed me later to say she was sorry I was upset and that I can speak to her on Monday if I need to.

What shall I do? There have been a number of these types of incidents and today feels like the straw that broke the camels back. Jane messaged me to see where I was but I just can’t ring myself to get in touch. Please help?

I guess it’s just been one, too many things and it’s starting to have a real affect on my wellbeing.
He doesn’t lead or manage anything or anyone which is cool, until you have a problem that you need help with. He creates issues because he has no boundaries with staff, allows unprofessional and toxic behaviour to continue until it gets so bad, people leave or are desperate to leave.

I had a project given to me that I worked hard on and enjoyed but I had to work alongside a member of his staff that was seriously underperforming. I had 15 meetings with my boss because she was having a major effect on my work on the project. I did everything I could and in the end, had to give up and had the project back. Sad thing is, he was pleased because it meant that he didn’t have to address these issues with that member of staff. She took on the project and he keeps telling me that it’s a mess and that all my hard work was for nothing!! WOW

Thank you everyone
I will take your advice. I will let you know how I get on.
The other really weird thing is, when Jane comes in on a Wednesday afternoon, she has to sit at someone else’s desk.
That phone is not on our loop for calls so doesn’t receive the incoming calls. We were always told they couldn’t change this so every afternoon, Jane doesn’t have to worry about answering anything! I mentioned this in my meeting and was suddenly advised that, yes, we will change that!!! She has been sat there for years without once picking up a call and suddenly, change can happen!!!

Another side note, the other job share colleague aired her concerns and also pointed out that I would be working alone. She advised that was the reason for the shift agreement in the first place. To make it fair for everyone.
I am not in the union. Would/could this be a union issue. We have no onsite HR and we are not told how to contact them. They are an external agency. We do have an onsite union rep? I will speak to the big boss on Monday but I am so nervous 😥