Partner turned off (My) wifi and upset my Son - AIBU

This!

Why on earth has a strange man of a mere few month’s meeting so involved in a child’s life when he isn’t their father.

Get rid.

Please tell us you’re not staying with this man? He should be nowhere near your children, what an abusive bastard.

You mess with my wi-fi, you take your life in your hands. You mess with my sick kid, you're REALLY in trouble.

In his mother's defence, I dare say she didn't get an accurate account of the event from her son, and is standing up for him because even though he's no longer a child he will always be her child. However, I don't see how that translates into her deciding to contact the girlfriend to criticise her parenting! That's weird stuff. I've got 4 adult sons so I've listened to more than a few relationship issues over the years, always prepared to give sympathy, advice and if called for a bit of tough love. But contacting the girlfriend directly is way beyond the job description.

OP, you did right. Don't let anyone tell you different. Having household rules is important, of course, but it's a harsh parent who isn't prepared to relax them in certain circumstances. That in itself can be a useful life lesson.

I think the main problem was that he did not feel hungry enough to eat a main meal, and the OP had put something aside for him to eat later. A social videogames session with his Dad was a nice distraction from him feeling ill. That's how I read the original post anyway.

Controlling twat. This is so wrong I don’t know where to begin. Don’t let him back in OP.

LTB. Your son will end up abused. Who the fuck is this man thinking he's in charge of your child over and above you as a mother? This will escalate. You already see you have no backup in MIL. For your son's sake you have to leave.

This would be such a HUGE red flag and trigger for me if anyone did that in my house, its a trick my very abusive ExH used to pull when he'd decided it was time for me to go to bed, He used to come downstairs with a face like thunder, switch it off at the wall and demand i get off my computer and go to bed, it never worked btw, and he'd be told to fuck off, but it pisses me off SO much.

Make this tosspot an Ex quick sharp and don't look back.

He's overstepped the bounds of his authority but I can see where he's coming from. One should be inclined to suspect that an 11-year-old who is too poorly to join the family for dinner but well enough to play social videogames may be trying it on.

This man would never step foot in my house again. He and his mum can go swivel.

Not read the thread but, why the fuck did he do this? So sad.

Has he apologised? Is there a back story?

Please do not put this man before your children, which you will be doing if you stay with him. Tell him today that he’s no business parenting your children or controlling your wifi. Please notice this huge red flag flapping in front of your face.

A mamma's boy whose mother will medle.in his relationship. Using "under his roof" is bs in general but doing that in a house ehe doesn't own or even live in. 10 months in and thinks he has a say. Time to get rid.

You made the right call

Thats so bizzare. He is so boldly controlling something that isnt his to control. Hopefully this is the end of your relationship.

So not only is your boyfriend of a few months MASSIVELY overstepping, so is his bloody mother

good that you’ve kicked him out, keep him gone and block his mother from everything

who the actual unmitigated fuck do these idiots think they are?

DO NOT INFLICT SUCH POISONOUS PEOPLE ON YOUR KIDS EVER AGAIN @candragonsbepurple

Agree with what everyone else says.

Cut all contact.

This signposts how he would behave if he DID move In permanently and how he would treat you and your children. If he’s doing this kind of thing 10mths in when he’s staying on a casual basis imagine what his narcissistic attitude would be in the future. The discipline he’d be drilling into your children - and you! He would be dictating everything you do and making the rule book to suit his warped patriarchal role- just no!

It would be goodbye to the boyfriend (and the potential future MIL) for me.

Well done op you will never regret kicking this knobhead out. They usually wait a bit longer to show their true colours so you are lucky in a way. Stay strong.

You said it well. It’s not your partner’s place to parent your children. End of

Firstly, well done sticking up for your son. You’d given him permission and that sounded completely reasonable.
Poor boy thinking his dad had just disconnected when really it was this awful man. Hope he gets to catch up with dad again soon.

Secondly, HIS roof?! The absolute audacity.

Thirdly, his mum can stick her opinion where the sun doesn’t shine.

Finally, you’ve left him, right? Right?!

ah well, ten months in isn't serious, you can get rid of him and things will be back to normal quite soon.

OP, he's a complete cock. It's NOT 'his' house (even if you shared joint ownership that wouldn't be the case, and if it were wholly his ownership then he'd be a dick to try to exploit your vulnerability like that. Nice people don't do that). It's not his kid. It's none of his business to try and enforce your son's contact with his dad, or even his gaming. It's a bit much to be coming the pater familias on 10 months' standing when he doesn't even live in!

Please just change the locks and move on.

Hope you've not let him back in op
10 months in a boyfriend should not be thinking he has the power to treat your children like that full stop as for under his roof what a twat!!

I do hope not.

My stepdad came into my life after a short time (he was a lodger in my DM’s house), he disciplined us without DM knowing and years later lied about that, loves control and of course after years he gets on with most of the family including me. But he’s certainly not easy.

I do know with DM and her own parents (divorce, living apart from her DM) there are reasons why she goes to men with issues, but no way she’d admit this.

Let’s hope OP grows a pair and ends it with this loser.

just wanted to chip in and say well done for the way you handled it and stood up for your son . It’s not easy when you are caught between but you obviously have your priorities right and are a good mum

What a twat. It's not even his WiFi!
Get rid! Your kids most probably hate him and will never what to live with him.