To ask my parents for financial help

24 and living at home is totally normal so you’re not a failure. I’m 42 and considered asking my parents to help pay for my masters as it’s only part funded by work. I feel at 42 I’d be being a bit cheeky but at 24, I’d be happy for my child to come to me.

Hang in there op.

I was so strapped for cash when I was training (unfunded pupillage, I’m quite old) but it worked out long term. I ended up getting a bank loan which I paid off after qualification, family help was not available.

Don’t compare yourself to people who’ve inherited, that’s a completely different situation.

Oh, @concernedchild , you're getting yourself in a right tangle. If your parents are decent people then of course they won't mind helping you. I've a teen DD and if she came to me struggling and I could help then I would want to. In fact, I'd be cross if she didn't ask me if she was sinking as badly as you appear to be. And, for what it's worth, I think you are sensible to keep to the wee treats you have planned. As you say, you have to have something to look forward to. It'll give you a good lift that could see you through future tough months. You sound like you are trying your very best. If you were my DD I'd be very proud of you. Please let your parents help. All the very best to you.

honestly, what's the point of having rich parents if you can't ask them for help.

If I was in you position, I'd create a spreadsheet of my incomings and outgoings, future expenses and details of the financial help you need, I would also be inclined to include interest on any amount you need (although they may not want you to do this) the offer will mean you aren't taking it for granted and that it's clear that it is loan, strictly business.

But a word of advice, do NOT overpromise your payments back, just set it at something you can EASILY afford, like 100 per month until it is paid, I wouldn't offer a set time limit either as the last thing you want to do is delay it or even worse go back to them for more help if an unexpected expense crops up, while you've got the opportunity give yourself the breathing room you need to make the most of it.

Good luck OP, this is only temporary, as long as you get there, it doesn't matter HOW you get there.

OP, really hope they give you the help you need. Mine did in the same situation as you and I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have lasted till qualification without their help, as 2 years is too long to go with literally nothing to look forward to, especially when you're also working hard all the time.

Please stick at it, even if they can't or won't help you - it really is worth it once you're qualified (I'm now 10 years in and I couldn't have dreamed of my current financial situation when I was studying!). Best of luck with it all x

I do not understand - if you are working for a legal firm why aren’t they paying for your exams? Is this normal - other posters seem to say the company pays. How many hours/days are you working as your earnings are exceptionally low?

If you are not working in law could you change your current job to boost earnings?

Are you guaranteed a better post with your current employer when you pass/qualify or will you have to take your chances elsewhere? Are there vacancies in your field in general?

Glad your parents have agreed to help. If you can find it, some evening babysitting might allow you to earn cash for fun while still studying for your exams.

Of course you should ask. Honestly, some of the responses on here...

You sound very switched on and logical. I bet your parents are dead proud of you and will be more than willing to help. Good luck OP.

What I don’t get is that your parents don’t realise you are struggling.

Our DS is doing an apprenticeship, and I can sense when he gets a bit tight at EOM.

You are writing like you are the most hard done to person that has ever lived! It is normal to be skint when you are a student or starting out in a career. I remember I didn’t have a holiday from the age of about 15 until I was about 25. I was overdrawn at the end of each month for the first three years of my working life and I certainly wasn’t “saving”. I am honestly flummoxed that you are talking about saving and holidays and concerts in the same breath as wanting to ask your parents for money.

Anyway I am 53 now and after those first three years in the workforce I came out as a qualified accountant and have never worried about money since, but I did the hard yards first.

All that said, I don’t think there is anything wrong in talking to your parents if you are struggling, but I don’t think this is the tale of woe you think it is. Some people don’t even have parents they can fall back on.

Hope your parents are receptive to the conversation 🙏 Like your dad said there are much worse things you could be asking for!!

There is no failure in having to struggle to achieve what you want.

It can feel galling when others seem to have things handed on a plate.

But...

Remember how you feel now. When you are qualified and have trainees of your own to manage this struggle you are having to make now will inform how you you deal with them.

You can and will get there.

Have an honest conversation with your parents. They may not realise how tight you are finding things right now. They may well not see the realities of your financial situation.

You are not a failure because you are still at the start of your career journey. You are someone who is working hard to fulfill their potential.

We are really open with our DC about money. There would never be any doubt in anyone’s mind about any of it, because we all know where the others stand.

Other people having an inheritance is just one of those things- it has put them ahead. It doesn’t mean you are behind.

Where have I said that I struggled?

I worked my way through my degree and into my current job, I didn’t struggle, I wasn’t going out drinking every weekend or to fancy holidays/concerts etc but I chose the career path I did, my husband also chose a career path that started on next to no money, we lived the life we could to fund the decisions we had made for ourselves thats all.

I’m glad that your message has gone down well @concernedchild and hope your meeting this evening is a positive one. Good luck with your course and qualifying, I’m sure you will look back at this time and not believe how far you have come but you can absolutely do it. The fact that you are doing it now on so little when it would be easy to just quit just proves that.

Of course you should ask. Once you are qualified you'll presumably be earning quite high, and so you can pay them back. I'd imagine they'd be mortified if you had to quit studying and working towards your career goals due to financial pressure. Think of it a cashflow issue. It's not as if your asking for money for a holiday or facial fillers or something frivolous like that.

It sounds like you have built this up to be much bigger than it really is. Possibly you are struggling with your feelings about where you are right now. Plus general exam/study stress.

I'm an accountant and can well remember how hard the study stage is.

My DCs are your age. We have happily helped them out whether for living support or for extra things like driving lessons.

We have made clear to them that we would far rather they asked for help earlier than later.

Best wishes for the conversation with your parents

My children are younger than you, but I couldn't let them struggle so much when they are working and studying.