To ask my parents for financial help

OP, you are going to have much more uncomfortable conversations than this once you qualify. You’ll need to talk to opposing solicitors, negotiate outcomes, talk to judges, senior lawyers, you’ll have to explain to clients why they cant have what they want, why you can’t secure the money they think should be theirs or whatever area of law you cover. You should be able to chat to your own parents an about your finances. None of this is insurmountable. If you don’t ask you don’t get.

You sound like you’re trying really hard for a bright future. You should be proud of yourself. I would help my family in a heartbeat 💓 hope yours help you.

Hi OP, I have a son in a similar situation to you and we are continuing to support him financially. It feels totally natural to us.

You should be very proud of yourself, in how far you've come so far, and in your goals that you are moving closer to every day! I am sure your parents are proud of you too.

Please don't feel crap - it would probably kill your parents to realise the agonising you've gone through before approaching them with this request. I am quite sure they will be happy to help - but, like another pp, I'm also puzzled that they haven't already worked out your situation for themselves.

Don't neglect your mental health. Concerts and things are terribly important if they are all that's standing between you and despair. I say this because it seems obvious that your parents easily have the means and will wish to support you.

Please ignore anyone who is saying you're a fool - how terribly cruel and wrong of them - and also ignore any could-have would-have should-have talk. It's pointless and irrelevant.

You should be proud of yourself, you are working hard for a better future/life. Ask your parents I know I would help my child out if I could x

I self funded mine and am now a senior lawyer on a high salary.

Sit down with your parents and tell them exactly what you've said here.

I have 2 kids around the same age as you - one living at home. If either of them were in your current predicament I'd help them in a heartbeat.

You're not being unreasonable. You just need a bit of a dig out in the short term.

OP, you know what? You're so hard-working and lovely, and so considerate about your parents - you don't feel entitled to their help which is nice. I'd be so proud if my children turn up like you 🙂.

But I almost feel emotional at the thought of a child of mine struggling in this way and feeling sick with worry at the thought asking me for help.

If your parents can afford it, they will want to help you, OP. This is money for your future livelihood, not for some frippery.

I pay for our DD rent whilst at uni £500 per month to help her whilst she's studies and have budgeted for it. It's something I wanted to do as I never had the opportunity to go to uni until later in life due affordability.

@IncompleteSenten is absolutely right, @concernedchild - I know it isn’t easy, but you need to focus on the fact that, once these exams and this training is over, you will be able to reap the rewards of all your hard work.

Your dad sounds lovely, and I think you do too - and I admire the way you have approached this - it is sensible and reasonable.

We have three dses, and we have helped them all out financially, at one time or another - and we will carry on doing so as long as we can manage to do so. We are in a secure position, financially, and we are happy that we can help them out. Sometimes it’s been a loan, and other times it’s been a gift.

Hopefully your parents will help you out but also you need to change the way you think. You are sacrificing in the short term for gains in the long term. Yes things are really tight now but it isn't forever. You'll come out the other side and reap the rewards. You have to look at what you can have long term instead of focusing on what you can't have now.

I think you re doing amazingly well. You are only 18 months from earning real money and no fees! You are getting real experience and studying at the same time.
Once you have a decent law degree there are many jobs open to you.
If you were my daughter I would be very proud of you.
Your parents will be glad to help you, let them help you.

Seriously showing how little you know with your very unhelpful posts.

You do know there are law firms outside of the City who operate very differently…

My cousin self funded and is also now working a City law firm, doing pretty well for herself.

I self funded. I got a training contract and am now working at a City law firm. Several of my classmates who also funded are similarly qualified, with some working in both magic circle and silver circle firms.

So no, not a waste at all.

Ds1 (28) still lives at home. He’s had a slow start to employment, having to repeat a year at uni, ill health, losing his job during Covid. He’s now got a good job and is saving for a house. There are times when he has needed help from me and times when he is able to put a bit into the house. I have very little to spare but I would willingly give him, or his brothers whatever I had if they needed it. I’m sure your parents will feel the same. Don’t make it too complicated. Speak to them and see what they come up with.

You poor thing, I twigged from your first post that this was going to be a law training contract/exams. Guess which profession I am in!

I qualified a long time ago and it was tough then. There were half as many TCs as people wanting them and I've heard it's more like 10 people for every TC now. So people saying you are foolish for not getting a TC at a big/top firm have no idea how hard it is to get one at all. Well done for getting yours.

I too had people shocked I had to pay for my own LPC course and exams. They told me "your firm HAS to pay" because they knew others in this situation. Erm, no, they don't have to at all!

Have you looked into getting a Career Development Loan? I got mine with HSBC but it might be called something different now. That was how I managed ...

Good luck. I hope they help you. I helped ds1 as much as possible when he was at uni. He didn't work just studied. He did a law degree but isn't in law. He couldn't get a job. He earns well though.

I would help my DD out (same age as you) in a heartbeat.

It's clear why some help is needed here, and it's for a worthy reason, so I wouldn't hesitate.

I'd be more disappointed that she'd not asked sooner and were feeling so anxious about even approaching us.

I think you sound really sensible, OP. Your parents will hopefully be impressed to see that you have a plan, and they will already be able to see that you are the not sort of person to waste money. They are your parents and I expect they are really proud of you and can see a bright future. You have to think of the situation you are in now as temporary. You are a student, and your chosen career path may be costly upfront, but you will reap the rewards later on as you are going into quite a stable field with opportunities all over the country. Over the course of your hopefully long career you will earn well for a far greater length of time than when you earned peanuts. Do not be embarrassed, we all need a little help every now and then. We don't all get it but you may as well ask.
Best of luck to you, I hope it goes well with your parents.

Hi OP,
I hope your parents will be happy to help you.

Are you an only child? If you are your parents might not be too concerned about you paying them back as they will probably hope that a lot of their savings will come to you one day. If you have siblings then they have to consider being fair to each of you.

I also think you are over complicating your request with all the talk of interest/10% of this and that etc. Just ask to borrow 5K and pay it back in regular installments. It's just over 4 years if you pay back £100 each month or just over 2 years if you pay back £200 each month.

Or you could just ask your parents to pay your exam fees direct and you will pay them back say £200 each month after you qualify. Bear in mind when you qualify you will also be wanting to save for a deposit for a house I expect so it will slow your plans down. If your parents offer that you don't have to pay them back accept!

Also remember that if you borrow 5K and pay back 5k no tax is due. If you start paying interest then that interest is taxable income for your parents.

Good luck with your meeting later

You're not being unreasonable in asking for help, there are a few things to consider

1. Are your parents comfortably able to lend the money
2. Are there no grants/student loans available to you ?
3. Will completing your course increase your earning ability?How long will that take ?
4. Can you make a realistic promise to them about how much you will pay back and when ?