To ask my parents for financial help

One of our children is your age, her and her older brother still live at home. It is really tough out there so I hope nobody here has given you a hard time about asking your parents for help! I tend to just read the OP posts. You sound like such a hard worker and so determined to achieve this massive thing on your own. Law is very expensive and very exhausting, not many can do it without some kind of help or support. If you were my child I would want you to come to me, I would absolutely hate to think of my child having so little left over for themselves if I was doing well and had money spare. You are only 24, that is so young to have so much pressure. These are some of the best years of your life, prioritise enjoying them as well as achieving something. Your parents won't want you to be miserable, I can assure you.

OP I'd be so proud of you if you were my child and I'd offer you the money as a gift. You've clearly worked hard without a break and are very dedicated to your future career. Let your parents help you if they offer more than you are asking.

@concernedchild

I'm in the US so obviously can't help with any financial tips.

However, one thing for you to think about (and it's what we told our sons when we paid for educational expenses, car expenses, & had them living at home rent free during Uni) is that by helping you financially now to get your qualifications your parents are actually also helping themselves for later on in their own lives. By helping you now they are setting you up for a good career and thus you'll probably need very little help from them when they, themselves, may have more financial needs (carers, special equipment, care home fees, etc). Or it just may leave them with extra money to spend on some little luxuries for themselves down the line. And of course, if life takes you that way, to spend on your children.

So don't feel guilty and don't turn down any help they offer. It's a favour to themselves as well as to you!

Good luck and best wishes!!!

You live at home

Your parents are wealthy

You're studying to be a solicitor

Yes, you can ask them for money.

Not rocket science.

OP, I have read some of your posts (not all as there were quite a lot), you come across as a very very thoughtful, considerate and hardworking young woman, I’m sure your parents will be happy to help you, you should probably have gone to them sooner as your financial situation seems to be causing you an immense amount of stress and that could impact your study and work

My DD is about to go through the same thing, although she's hoping to get into a firm that will pay SQE, we are fully resigned to helping her financially for a few years yet. No harm in asking for help

So would it be right that the anxiety about asking for a gift/loan is really about the expected effect on family dynamics and sibling relationships?

In the 2023/24 academic year, a household earning £200k is expected to contribute £4,710 towards a child’s living costs (living at home).
Maximum maintenance loan £8,400
Government help £3,690
Parental contribution £4,710

YANBU to ask for help, however
you are now in an age that is expected for you to be financially independent. I understand how you feel.

Are your uni courses ending in the foreseeable future? Can you look for extra income or move jobs as soon as is reasonable practicable? Those are questions you need to answer to yourself.
BTW you are not a failure in any ways, you are doing a good job.

Btw you should absolutely not do any unpaid babysitting! Cheeky fuckers.

Is there a huge backstory that stops you talking about finances with your parents? I've always had a very open relationship with my parents when it comes to finances - they gave me most of my financial education! It's very saddening to read that you feel it would negatively affect family dynamics to get a temporary loan that you'll pay back.

I feel you're yet another victim of the hidden university parental contribution. If the student loan letter had explained you received the minimum loan and your parents were expected to contribute £x, you wouldn't be in this bizarre situation. The student loan system EXPECTS your parents to contribute - it just doesn't tell them or you. Have a read here: https://www.moneysavingexpert.com/students/student-loan-parental-contribution-tool/guide/

Fingers crossed the chat goes well tonight.

You need to admit to yourself that you can't afford expensive summer plans in your current circumstances. I'm sorry but that's just life.

Another solicitor here. Self funding outside of the big firms isn't unusual and hasn't been for a very long time.

My parents very generously paid for my LPC - I had set money aside that they wouldn't accept as they wanted me to focus on the course not how I would pay for it. Having qualified many years ago, I am fortunate to earn very well now so there is no question that it was worth paying for.

I don't think you're unreasonable asking. Your parents have likely not realised the financial position you're in. Sounds like you have a good relationship, I hope things work out.

You absolutely haven't been a fool and you're not failing. You've made the best of your circumstances by securing another training contract after your last firm closed.

As others have said, law in the early years is often badly paid and tough. The end is in sight. This is a stop gap. Once you qualify, your salary will increase (without the qualification you'd stay a paralegal with limited earning potential). You can then move firms, improve your salary etc. things will get better so just hang in there.

I’d be helping my child with this without being asked. I’m not well off at all and don’t even own my own property (live in southeast and a single parent) but I’d be helping my children out as much as I can. My ex is paying for my children’s uni fee’s as he got a free education and wants his children to have one. If I had a couple of hundred grand, well I’d certainly be helping. It’s great you’re so independent but don’t be too proud to let them help you. Good luck for the chat

If you’re a student can you not get an interest free overdraft? I lived in mine at uni!!

Are you taking the SQE? They are quite expensive. Hope your parents help you. You will earn all money back once you are in the job.

This might help OP if you decide you'd like to set up a loan from your parents on a more formal basis.

https://justlend.co/